MESSAGE FROM DEE-DEE

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hep93
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Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/2/2010 3:08 PM (GMT -7)   
DeeDee (Sandy) has been in touch with me and wanted you all to know that she is safe.   She is away from her husband and doing well.  She wants to thank Rick, WG, and everyone for their messages and prayers.  Please continue to keep her in your thoughts as she plans what to do next.  I will continue to maintain contact with her and keep everyone updated.
 
Hugs,
Connie (and DeeDee)
hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


worriedgirl
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Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1130
   Posted 2/2/2010 4:51 PM (GMT -7)   
if you talk to her again let her know i would like to talk to her. i hope all is well and i hope she finds peace and that i am here for her if she needs someone as i know what its like

The only person who can make you happy is you. Be your own self and love who you are because each and every one of you are wonderful for who you are


hep93
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Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/2/2010 6:13 PM (GMT -7)   

WG, I'll pass on your message.  She is not using a computer right now.

Hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


worriedgirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1130
   Posted 2/3/2010 7:36 AM (GMT -7)   
is she doing ok without her hubby. i am a little worried bout her. i hope all is well with her. she will be missed when she is not on here.
The only person who can make you happy is you. Be your own self and love who you are because each and every one of you are wonderful for who you are


hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/3/2010 11:14 AM (GMT -7)   

She has grown children nearby and seems resolved to not go back to her husband--a hard thing after 30+ years of marriage, but she's had enough.  I'll let her know you are concerned about her.

Hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


worriedgirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1130
   Posted 2/3/2010 12:43 PM (GMT -7)   
yeah she called and talked to me today and seems to be doing well. i told her she can call anytime she needs a ear.
The only person who can make you happy is you. Be your own self and love who you are because each and every one of you are wonderful for who you are


hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/3/2010 3:33 PM (GMT -7)   

WG, glad she called you.  I tried to reach her and didn't get an answer.  May try again later.

Hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 2/5/2010 9:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Connie and Wg, I am doing fine. I'm staying with my son for now. My grandkids are going to be here for the weekend. I need to get more min. on my phone and my son doesn't have long distance so I will call u or email when I can. I,m on an unsecured network so don,t want to be on to long. My son said hubby stopped drinking and going to meetings ,heard and seen this before so time will tell.
Thanks for talking to me and for the advice and the listening ear.
Rick, I used your screen play moto to hubby and he was I guess shocked and dumb founded, he didn't know what to say. Thanks so much to all of you. Hope to call or be on soon.
Luv u guys,
Dee Dee

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/5/2010 10:29 AM (GMT -7)   

Dee, thanks for posting!  I was concerned.  Remember what I told you--it takes 6 mos. to a yr. to begin to "get" the program.  Think about all the bad parts of being with him when/if you are tempted to return. 

Take care of yourself!

Hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


sad grandma one
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 2/6/2010 5:59 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey  DeeDee,
 
Hope and pray you are doing okay. Its  hard being with a "drinker". My mother was one for many many years. Thank God she finally stopped about 5 years ago.
 
Be strong.  Will keep you in my prayers.
 
Sad Grandma onecry

Pink Grandma
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 2445
   Posted 2/7/2010 8:26 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi DeeDee,  Glad to hear you are doing well.  Take care of you for awhile.  You need to baby yourself.  What you are going through is hard I know.  When I finally left my first husband after 25 years of a very unhappy marriage it was the best thing that I could have done for myself.  But the guilt ate me up alive for the first couple of months.  (Don't know what I had to feel guilty for, but it was there.) I felt like a failure.   Once the guilt was gone.... I didn't look back.   Can't imagine where I would be had I stayed. 
 Hang in there.........lot's of thoughts and prayers..........
Pink Grandma
Forum moderator-Hepatitis

When the going gets tough....the tough get going! Don't always know where I going but I get there anyways.


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 2/9/2010 10:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi everybody, I'm doing ok. I'm still staying with my son. I enjoyed the grandkids but they do tire me out.
My son said my hubby is still going to meetings and staying sober. I hope for his sake he does continue.
It's hard not being in my own home but it is peaceful, no yo yo effect going on with out hubby.
Im on an unsec. network so I have to go for now, I don't trust some one getting my info.
Thanks for all your help and prayers.
Take care and my thoughts and prayers are with you all,
Dee Dee

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/9/2010 3:42 PM (GMT -7)   

Dee-Dee, I'm so glad you posted and are still with your son.  If there's a number where I can reach you, please e-mail it to me or call me and I will call you right back.  I'd really like to talk to you, though evening is best as I will be out much of this week during the day.

Hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 2/10/2010 5:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Connie! I'm doing ok, It's a big adjustment being with out hubby but I think It's for the best. I talked to him yesterday and he sounds good and says he understands my decision to leave.  He has been going to 2 meetings a day and he hopes he stays sober. He seems to be serious about it this time and he say's he doesn't want to lose me so he hopes I will come back home in  time. I told him he needs to be sober for while and he needs to prove himself to me. I told him I love him and want the best for him but that I need to take care of me now and only time will tell if I come home.
I will call you when I get out and get more min. on my phone. I just didn't have time and today we got alot of snow and its just starting to slow down but the winds are about 30 mi. hr. gusts.
Take care and thank you for thinking of me ,
Dee Dee

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/10/2010 5:27 PM (GMT -7)   

DeeDee, it's so good to hear from you!  I am very glad to hear that you are continuing to stay away from your husband.  One thing he needs to be sure of is that he is sobering up for himself, not for you.  It just doesn't work if an alcoholic or addict does it for someone else--voice of experience here.  You are going to need to keep the bad times with him fresh in your mind to stay strong in your convictions.

Try to keep warm and stay out of the bad weather!

Big hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


sad grandma one
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 2/13/2010 8:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey DeeDee,

So happy to hear you are doing fine.

Think of yourself right now and take good care of you.

Will keep you in my prayers. I pray everything works out great for you.

Take care,
Sad Grandma one

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/19/2010 12:27 PM (GMT -7)   

I got an e-mail from DeeDee today.  She is still away from her husband and doing well.  She found out that he has stage 2 varices and portal hypertension, but continues to be sober.  He was told that he needs a transplant, but of course he has to be sober for 6 mos.  She asked that I say hello to you all and to tell you that she misses you.

C.


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 2/23/2010 4:38 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone. I'm back home but not why you think. My hubby started drinking again and tried to kill himself I had him taken to a hospital and be comitted but there was no beds available so I stayed with him 1 day and he became violent so I called police and now he is in jail and I got a PFA on him. He can't come back home and he hasnt been released on bail yet. He actually called me to get him out. I didn't even talk to him, my son did and he told him NO! My son told him that he promised to get help and his response was I was only home 1 day and my son said and look what you did in 1 day. Alot happend to much to go into and I'm pretty tired It was a long night and day. So I will get back to you when I get some rest and I have alot of changes to make. Thank you all for your support and I hope all is well with everyone.
Rick I'm glad your appointment went well, Hope it continues for a long ,long time. Keep doing what your doing it's working.
Connie, I will give you a call.
 
Take care and my thoughts and prayers go out to you all,
Dee

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/23/2010 5:03 PM (GMT -7)   

DeeDee, those protective orders really mean nothing.  He would have to violate it before they could do anything to him and by then it might be too late.  I know he's in jail now, but I'm thinking ahead to his possibly getting out.  I hope that he can be transferred to a psych. ward in a hospital rather than released.  I just want you to be safe and to know you don't have to worry about what he might do.  He could harm you in a blackout and not even remember doing it.   And he really should be the one to have to leave the house, not you.  However, I'm not sure you are safe there.  You see now why I was insisting on him being at least 6 mos. sober before going back to him, and why transplant centers require that?  Also, remember our conversation and me telling you that he would try to manipulate you by threatening suicide?  You simply cannot get involved, regardless of what he is saying or doing.

Please do call me when you can.  I expect to be here the next few days and nights.  I can call you right back.  Try to make it after 5 PM, though, if possible.

Hugs,

Connie



hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Post Edited (hep93) : 2/24/2010 11:10:38 AM (GMT-7)


sad grandma one
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 2/24/2010 2:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Dee Dee,

So glad to hear your alright. You just protect yourself.

Your son has really stepped up for his mom. Let him help you. At times like this it sure helps that you hsve someone to help you. I bet you feel better back in your own house.

Will keep you in my prayers, So glad to see you posting again.
Sad Grandma one

worriedgirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1130
   Posted 2/24/2010 6:01 PM (GMT -7)   
and you can call me anytime. ill be here til friday afternoon then im going out of town
The only person who can make you happy is you. Be your own self and love who you are because each and every one of you are wonderful for who you are


hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/25/2010 5:48 PM (GMT -7)   
I talked with DeeDee this evening.  She is okay and staying in her own home while her hubby is with their son.  There's a court hearing next Tues. regarding the restraining order. 

hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 2/26/2010 9:00 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Everyone! It's great to be back home. Theres no place like home. I'm doing pretty good and my home is nice and quiet and I'm really enjoying the peacefullness here. It seems like I was gone for alot longer than I actually was. Hubby is out of jail but not bothering me. He is going to meetings and is very remorseful. He has alot of sole searching to do along with being sober. He needs to take care of himself now and get is life on track without me. He needs to learn to do things for himself. I can't help him he has to help himself.  I hope he can stay sober so I can trust him again, I would hate to throw away a 30 plus yr. marriage but it will take time for  me to be sure he is really sober. I need to take care of me now .

I want to thank you all for your support and prayers. Now, how is everybody???? Please get me caught up.

Dee Dee

 


hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 2/26/2010 9:26 PM (GMT -7)   

DeeDee, it's good to see you posting!  You've been missed.  Your husband has a long road ahead of him to sobriety.

We have a lot of new members here.  Hope you can read some of their posts and participate. 

Keep in touch!

Big hugs,

Connie


hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis
 
"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland


deedee48
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2009
Total Posts : 148
   Posted 3/2/2010 11:35 AM (GMT -7)   

Connie, I had the hearing today I will call you tomorrow and tell you what happened.(he is still not home) I'm going to my daughters today to watch her kids until she gets back from school tonight. She has parent teacher conferences and where she teaches it's a very large school so she won't be home until about 9:30 and then I have to drive home. She lives about 1 hr. from me.

Take care ,

Dee Dee

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