Hello....It's Been A Long Time Since I've Posted

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Shel
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 122
   Posted 10/16/2007 1:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello everyone, I hope everyone is doing good under each of your circumstances.  It's been several months since I've been to the forum.  My husband Robert was diagnosed with ESLD/Cirrhosis almost two years ago due to alcoholism. When he first became sick in December 2005, he was admitted into ICU with upper GI bleeding (varices) and lower GI bleeding, extemely high amonia levels, jaundice, ascites, and couldn't even function on his own.  Now almost two years later, I'm thankful that there is light at the end of the long and dark tunnel.  First, I proud to say that Robert has been sober going on 1 year and 10 months. He completed A.A. and counseling which really was to his benefit even though in the beginning, he wasn't happy about it.  But he made up his mind that he was going to take care of himself and not return to the awful lifestyle that he was living.  He cares about his health and quality of life.  I've seen a lot of changes in him over the last two years.  From hitting rock bottom to rising to the top.  Robert is a much better person.  He was always a wonderful person but when he was drinking, he was not himself as I'm sure most of you know what it is to live with an alcoholic.  He is patient, more loving, more kind, more compassionate, more helpful, the most I've ever seen in the 10 years that we have been together. Most of all, he's been a terrifc father and is able to see and be around our 8 year old daughter growing and being involved in her life.  He continues to have hospital stays with bleeding varices, sugar diabetes and a pancreatic problems, all of which is being managed as well as can be expected with meds and doctor visits.  He is on the liver transplant waiting list through Mayo Clinic in AZ. Infact, we're headed for an appointment November 7-9 for some routine testing and screenings.  The docs say that Robert is really in good shape for all that he has endured over the last two years.  He has other problems such as Thyroid, Sugar Diabetes, Pancreas Damage and a Heart Murmur, most of which the doc says is a result of the ESLD/cirrhosis.  But it's up to Robert to take care of himself the best he can, and he does.  I work full-time, full-time Mom and his caregiver, even though we have been through so much, I wouldn't have it no other way.  We have been through the worst of the worst from almost death to financial worries and we have pulled through with the grace of god and many prayers.  Even though Robert is not working, he collects his pension and social security, which is a great help towards our household.  He keeps active around the house the best he can, he takes and picks up our daughter from school everyday, runs errands and loves to cook, so he helps me with all of these things while I'm working.  I would have never seen this out of him two years ago.  I feel so lucky and blessed to have a wonderful husband and wonderful family support.  I just want to let you folks know out there, that are going through some really tough times with your illness or are a caregiver to someone with an illness, be strong, keep your faith, believe in prayer, because I believe that "God" will help us through and help get us through our most difficult times in our lives.  Most of all, believe in yourselves, because you're the only one who can make great things happen for yourself.  If your a caregiver, never give up and put all your heart and soul into it because it will all be worth it in the end to know that you have helped someone through a difficult time in their life.  Take care everyone, I'll continue to read and post when I can.  I'll keep everyone on this forum in my thoughts and prayers.
*Hugs, Thoughts, and Prayers*
   *Shel in New Mexico, USA*
 


Pink Grandma
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 2445
   Posted 10/16/2007 6:32 PM (GMT -7)   
A Big WELCOME BACK to you Shelley, you have been missed! So happy to hear that Robert is doing so well. It's wonderful to hear from you again. We have quite a few new members since you last posted that can use any of your advice or support that you can give. Please come back and share. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family.
Pink Grandma
Forum moderator-Hepatitis

When the going gets tough....the tough get going!


Butterflythree
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 954
   Posted 10/16/2007 8:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Shel, I am fairly new here but wanted to say I am glad that your husband is doing well. My husband was diagnosed with cirrhosis in July of 2006.

It is good that you have such a positive attitude. I will have to keep coming back to this post when I start feeling negative. You have been through so much more than I, and there are times I think that I don't know if I can do this.

Thanks for being an inspiration.

Shel
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 122
   Posted 10/17/2007 7:25 AM (GMT -7)   
Butterflythree, I'm sorry that you're husband was diagnosed with cirrhosis, believe me, I know what you're going through. Before my husband became seriously ill, he was diagnosed with cirrhosis about 5-6 months prior and was warned about his drinking. He didn't care what the docs had to say and continued doing his own thing. Then in December 2005, his body just couldn't take it anymore and that's when all his complications began. All kinds of things happened at one time, I didn't know what to do or who to turn to because I felt like my whole world came crashing down on me, I felt the same way you do, but you know what, I didn't give up and I turned to god to help me through difficult times. So I can offer the same advice to you that helped me get through the times I didn't think I could do it anymore. I knew in my heart that in the end things would be okay, I just had to have patience, strength, will power and to believe in god. If you have some family support, please turn to them, because you can't do this all by yourself. Please try to stay positive and be strong for your husband, he needs you the most right now. Take care and I'll keep you in thoughts and prayers.
*Hugs, Thoughts, and Prayers*
   *Shel in New Mexico, USA*
 


Butterflythree
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 954
   Posted 10/17/2007 4:10 PM (GMT -7)   
Shel, My husband quit drinking right after he was diagnosed with cirrhosis. After reading a lot of the other posts I realize that he has been fortunate so far. He has portal hypertension, ascites, and varices. He has had no bleeds yet and the ascites is being controlled with medication. He has sometimes frequent events of encephalopathy(??spelling). I guess that is when I worry the most. I am handling it better now since I have been coming here. You are all such a great help.

Thanks for your prayers. I will also keep you in mine.

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 10/17/2007 8:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Shel, what wonderful news!!! However, it concerns me that you say Robert "completed" AA. AA is never completed. He still needs to go to meetings to continue to "live life on life's terms." Also to read the Big Book, meditations, and other literature, and to maintain close contact with God. He sounds as though he has AA working in his life, when you mention his involvement at home and with your daughter. Don't take it for granted. There are even online meetings, which I go to sometimes...and I have 21 years of continuous sobriety.

Keep your wonderful, positive spirit and all will be well. And tell Robert congratulations from me, an "old timer."

Hugs,
Connie

Shel
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 122
   Posted 10/18/2007 2:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Connie, you're right A.A. is never completed, basically what I was saying is the Robert has met all his requirements to be listed for a transplant. He's completed his required 6 months of A.A. He does continue to attend every now and then and has a great sponsor. We have brought "God" more into our lives and couldn't be more happier. Sure I sometimes question why "God" has put us through so much, but in the end, I always know that if I continue to keep "God" close to my heart, I know things will work out.

Thanks for your encouragement!
*Hugs, Thoughts, and Prayers*
   *Shel in New Mexico, USA*
 


Butterflythree
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 954
   Posted 10/18/2007 5:14 PM (GMT -7)   
Shel, I am really glad Robert has almost 2 years of sobriety and is doing so well. If you keep God close to your heart everything will work out. I don't really believe that God puts us through the hard times. I think it hurts him to see us suffer. It is Satan that tests our faith. I think God trys to tell us things at times, and we just don't hear him. I've been told if you just give everything to God and believe, he will take all your worries and cares away. I guess I have never been able to do that totally. I'm trying to learn how. Don't believe that God gave this illness to your husband. As my sister would say "That is a lie from the Devil"!

When I read your words I can tell that you are letting God take control. You have such a positive attitude. I hope that one day I will be able to totally give it at all to God.

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 10/19/2007 3:03 PM (GMT -7)   
Shel, thanks for defining "completed" as you meant it. As for "turning it over" to a higher power, that's where faith comes in. ;)

You and Robert are both "winners." :)

Hugs,
Connie
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