JoAnn, my thoughts are with you right now. I know it is easy to become discouraged. It seems like with liver disease there is no cut and dried remedies or solutions doesn't it? I think that we as caregivers as well as the victims have to take each day for what it is. Some are bad and some are good. It is the good days that seem to sustain us. For me, when I was at my moms trying to get thru each day I made it my mission to find something good about that day. Even if it was a smile from her or a pat on the face. Now that she is gone I try to remember those little things that I tucked away in my memory banks. Even though it has only been 6 weeks the pain she suffered as well as the illness itself seems to be diminishing a little for me. I look at a beautiful picture I have of her on my wall in my bedroom everynight and try to imagine all the good times we had. Her smile, her humor, her wit, and her never ending guidance in our lives. The only pearls of wisdom I can share is what I have already said and add that you are a wonderful loving wife who has given everything you have to give to him. Even tho he may not be able to express himself the way he used to believe me when I tell you he knows and appreciates all you are doing. Go get your nails done or get your hair done. Do something good for you. Not only do you need it and deserve it you will find out that you actually will be mentally stronger. Trust your instincts honey, they are usually 100% correct.
Never say to yourself, "I should have, or could have, or would have" because in the whole scheme of things you do the best you can at the time that you did them. So none of the could've, should've, would've really matters.