Bunny, I am so sorry to hear about this. You've had a lot of trouble with this guy and I can't believe there's no one to get a second opinion from! Where do you live again? Do there happen to be any tertiary care centers somewhat nearby? I'm talking places like Cleveland Clinic, Mayo, etc. If you want to be seen at a tertiary care center, your PCP should not prevent you from doing so; s/he should get you a referral. If they give you crap about it, you know you need to switch PCPs.
As far as the job goes...are you on FMLA? Family Medical Leave Act? If you are a full-time employee, working 40 hours a week, you should be protected from losing your job due to illness. Here is a website explaining it. http://www.dol.gov/esa/regs/statutes/whd/fmla.htm
Keep us posted. We don't want you to lose your job! Have you spoken with your boss about the whole thing? Is anyone understanding??
this may not be constructive but i would sue the pants of him for mal practice and get him struck off.
Gotta throw in my two cents even though they won't be very motivating...generally, successful malpractice cases result in profound health loss (meaning...they cut off the wrong arm so you have to live without it for the rest of your life, or they give you a dose of epinephrine that makes you a vegetable for the rest of your life, or something of that nature) that could have easily been prevented if the physician hadn't been off in lala land or neglectful. If your diagnosis is in question, though, and you had a bit more D because of what they gave you or you waited two extra months to get proper treatment for a chronic but incurable illness, a suit won't likely be successful. It would be extremely costly and stressful and it wouldn't likely win. That isn't to say it wouldn't for sure, but if you do a cost/stress-benefit analysis you might find that a malpractice suit would leave you in the poorhouse if it wasn't successful.
This is NOT coming from the pre-med/my-family's-full-of-doctors standpoint (even though I suppose I can't help but be biased!). This just comes from a LOT of reading. There was an article in the New Yorker a couple of weeks ago on malpractice that you might want to check out. Great article...maybe you can go to newyorker.com and see if there's a link to it.
It's not fair when doctors don't give us the treatment we deserve, or when they give a treatment that seems to be pulling at straws. It is downright infuriating. I know this blazingly well. If I were you, I would write my physician a letter explaining why I think he's an idiot and send it certified mail so he's sure to get it. Those letters from patients can mean a lot. It may not get him to change his ways, but it will get him to think. Maybe it'll even keep him up at night a bit if you write it strongly enough. That may not seem like enough with all the crap you've been through, and I hear ya there; I've left doctor's offices crying in rage because they were being such a-holes/idiots/morons, and I've wanted the sue the crap out of them too, but ultimately realized that my experience with them empowered ME more and thought, well, at least some good has come from it.
Definitely, definitely you need a new doc, maybe a new whole team of docs. I know you're strugglin', girl. Go get those referrals from your PCP and let us know how it goes.