Advice needed Please!

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try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 11:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Ok so here's the deal. I'm 15 years old and have just been diagnosed with IBS even though I've had it for about 5 to 6 years already. I really don't know what to do about my parents. I've gotten high depression ever since I got this. It's so hard for me to go to school now b/c of the urges and pains I get during class. I'm missing tons of work and my teachers keep getting more and more frustrated with me even though I have a note from my doctor. I haev one parent telling me its my fault and the other telling me its not. I don't knwo what to do anymore. I don't want to live my life in pain. I want to have hope that it will get better but I just don't know anymore. It's getting to the point where I can't leave my house to see my friends or go to parties or even go for a walk without havign a pain or an urge. I'  have thought about commiting suicide but have usually been talked out of it. I need somone, anyone to help me out. What should I do? And has anyone had any situations like mine?

NH66
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/4/2007 11:38 AM (GMT -7)   
try2survive89x,
Welcome, i'am sorry to hear you have IBS. Have you tried any antidepressants??? Maybe you can talk to our parents about feelings. You are so young, you have have so much to live for and you don't even realize, it may seem dark now but things will get better. There is nothing in life so bad, it's worth taking your own life. If you ever need to talk, you found the right place. The folks here can make you smile. and forget about your problems.
Why does your patent tell you it's your fault??
 WRINKLES ONLY GO WHERE SMILES HAVE BEEN


try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 11:51 AM (GMT -7)   
MY dad tells me its my fault b/c he says that ibs is psychological. He says that at any minute i could get rid of it. But i've tried and it never works. Then i started reading this and i think hes wayyyy wrong. He threatens me to get a colonoscapy bag and tells me that if i keep missing school i'll be in big trouble but my mom seems to understand alittle. I have been told that "I make all the problems" in my house b/c of it. I have two other sibling who dont have it and they laugh atme for it. My friends and enemies even laugh at me for it b/c i have my own bathroom at school. (When I can make it to school).

7Lil
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 3269
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi and welcome to HealingWell!
Sorry you are having such a difficult time right now. You are so young to be having as much trouble as you are.
What sort of tests have you had done to be given the IBS diagnosis? Does GI trouble run in your family (ulcers, IBD, IBS, acid reflux)? Are you taking anything meds or supplements?
Most of us on here take some type of probiotic. Probiotics are essential for healthy gut function. Many of us also take fiber as well... it will bulk up the stool and help keep things moving. Some of us also take calcium to help control D. Calcium + Vitamin D (with NO magnesium) seems to be the concensus on what is best.
NH66 is right about antidepressants. They have been known to help ease the gut. Has your doc mentioned this?
I hope you can find some help here on the site.
Co-Moderator for the IBS Forum
 
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try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:05 PM (GMT -7)   
My doctor wont prescribe me with anti-depressants he wants me to wait until I see a Psychologist before he does anything. I've taken a few tests. Like samples and stuff. I havent gotten a colonoscopy. I do take fiber suppliments like Konsyl and fiber choice and metamucil. I don't know if it runs in my family or not. My mom was adopted so i dont know but my dad told me he doesnt have it on his side.

NH66
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:12 PM (GMT -7)   
First of all, it's NOT your fault. See if you can calmly talk to your dad and show him some of the info on the net, maybe he needs to learn more about it to fully understsnd it. The more you and your dad know about it the easier it will be to live with it. When your siblings and friends tease you, ask them if they ever had a stomach flu, b/c that is what it's like everyday. I'am sure they can relate to that. Not so funny is it.

Keep your chin up
 WRINKLES ONLY GO WHERE SMILES HAVE BEEN


try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:16 PM (GMT -7)   
I keep trying to keep my hopes up so that tomarrow can be a better day but its all so stressful. My friend just called me like 2 minutes ago and asked me why i wasnt at school and started laughing at me. It's so hard for me to keep going on like this. I mean i'm really trying to make it work so i can be happy but happiness just doesnt seem like an option anymore. :(

NH66
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Do your fiends know what you have?? Can you ask them to help you and be supportive? People in general are very heplfull, but sometimes you have to remind them. Do you have any hobbies?? Something to take your mind off the situation.
 WRINKLES ONLY GO WHERE SMILES HAVE BEEN


try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:32 PM (GMT -7)   
No, I think it's kind of embarassing to say. "Hey I have IBS and I have diarreah constantly." I mean some people spread things around. I use to be able to write but since this thing started getting worse i havent had the time. I try to sleep most of the time to try and ease the pain alittle bit. I really want to be able to pick up something to be able to get my mind off it.

NH66
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Guess what, you just found your new hobbie. If you keep reading though some of the posts on this forum, you will find yourself feeling better. Some of things other people have gone though will make you think that your situation is not so different. Readind other problems, makes your seem less severe.
If you love to what a better place to do it. Write something funny, embarrassing, it's OK you don't know us.
 WRINKLES ONLY GO WHERE SMILES HAVE BEEN


try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:49 PM (GMT -7)   
lol thanks.

NH66
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 52
   Posted 4/4/2007 12:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Fair warning, this place is addicting.
 WRINKLES ONLY GO WHERE SMILES HAVE BEEN


7Lil
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 3269
   Posted 4/4/2007 1:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Check this brochure out: IBS Brochure
 
Pass it to your friends and family.


Co-Moderator for the IBS Forum
 
Please donate to help HealingWell continue to help us..... www.healingwell.com/donate


Keriamon
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 4/4/2007 1:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Lil; I was just thinking Try needed that very brochure for family and friends.

We have had several other teens with IBS come on here. A number of them have had to apply for special homeschooling because they can't go to regular school anymore. There should be a program set up with your school for kids who are too medically ill to attend classes. The one guy who was in it said that he had to meet with a small homeschool study group of other sick kids and a teacher for a short amount of time a few days a week, but most of the time he was on his own to study and learn. I think they had some sort of web contact with the teacher too. Anyways, while his IBS didn't go away, he felt that it wasn't as bad either once the stress of ridicule and finding a bathroom had gone away. You just need to meet with a counselor or advisor at school and discuss your options for leaving school for the rest of the semester and find out what options they have for you to study at home. Surely there's got to be one teacher there somewhere that cares a little bit about you and will be your advocate.

Shame police are now arresting kids for pulling the old laxative-in-baked-goods joke. Nothing like sending everyone you know to the bathroom while YOU laugh at them for once! Lol, fun to think about, anwyays.

It's hard to get a picture of your life at home just from the little that you have written, but it seems like your dad is a bit on the verbally/psychologically abusive side. I mean, if this is the only thing he's totally stupid on, then he's probably not abusive, just an insensitive, immature lout (hey, my dad's been immature my whole life). If he is constantly blaming you for other things out of your control, if he is constantly telling you that there's something wrong with you, that you're fat or ugly or stupid or lazy or not as good as your siblings, anything of that nature, then he's being abusive. You can always talk to your school counselor about it, because you are not required to live under that sort of abuse.

It's a shame that you seem to have such sucky friends (frenemies--new slang word I picked up the other day); they could be a refuge for you if they wanted to be. I've heard of more than one kid bunking down in a friend's parent's house because the parents at home were too much to handle. Of course, at 15, your friends may just be going through their own stupid, insensitive lout stage and may grow out of it, but there's only so much you can take, despite whatever other redeeming qualities they may have. But, if any of them have parents that you are close to, you may want to talk to them about your situation and ask for advice. Another good place to go is to other family members whom you are close to. Heck, when I moved back home after college, my mother got so needy and controlling and making all sorts of crazy accusations against my then-boyfriend (now husband) that I ended up moving out and moving in with my grandmother. My grandmother has always been my escape from my mother when she's in one of her moods. You may just need to escape from your Dad and other siblings. While stress makes IBS worse, it doesn't cause it in the first place. You may, however, make your IBS better by getting out from under all your ridiculing jerky friends and family members.

try2survive89x
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/4/2007 2:03 PM (GMT -7)   
You are mostly correct on what you said. My father does yella t me somtimes.But I'm trying very hard to keep my cool with about my IBS. I'm trying my hardest to also get my mom to understand it alittle more too. I'm alittle uncomfotable with my home life. Mostly because when it's time to go. I get flack about it.

Post Edited (try2survive89x) : 4/4/2007 3:36:21 PM (GMT-6)

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