Husband is cheating

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puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/5/2009 1:18 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey everyone.  I'm so hurt and angry right now.  My DH left open his Facebook account, so I had a look, maybe that was wrong, but there were messages back and forth between him and some woman he knew in high school.  He wrote thing to her like, I love you, I'm falling in love with you.  You are the best thing that's happened to me in years, I can't wait to see you, I want you so bad.  Now DH says he never he had sex with her, but now I just can't beleve him or trust him.  He says her husband is very sick and it was nice to have someone to talk to and that he's so sorry.  Right now I just wish I was dead.  I feel so used and hurt.  I want to leave but how am I going to raise two young boys by myself when I can't even work at this point?  I just don't know what to do.  Thanks for the imput, please pray for me.

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


jhmom
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 2244
   Posted 6/5/2009 1:30 PM (GMT -7)   
((((( Jennifer ))))) I am so sorry you are going through this. It is heartbreaking, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Stacie
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding ~ Proverbs 3:5 ~

DX: Lupus, Sjogrens, Raynaud's, Hashimoto's and Celiac Disease
RX: Imuran, Plaquenil, Methotrexate, Flexeril, Piroxicam, Levoxyl, Folic Acid, Folgard OS (B12), Vitamin D-50,000 IU, Tramadol (as needed) and magic mouthwash (for mouth sores)


redrose77
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 2573
   Posted 6/5/2009 1:33 PM (GMT -7)   
Please consider counceling both alone and together. There is a very good chance he has blown feelings of graditude for someone who understands what he is going through way out of proportion and that time spent not talking with this woman would offer him perspective. I know that being cheated on really hurts even when the cheating is emotional instead of physical but there is a chance he really does regret his behavior. The big thing is you need to deal with the anger and hurt however is best for you while remembering you have 2 children who need both their parents. I wish there was an easy solution. I would insist he delete his facebook account and that he discontinue all contact with this woman. Those would be non-negotible if it were me.
Dx:fibromyalgia 2002, systematic lupus 2005- definate CNS involvement dxed late 2005, psoriasis 2006, rheumatoid arthritis 2006, PTSD 2007, multiple allergies 2005, migraine, compression fractures T11 & T12, Sjögren's, damaged periphrial nerves 2007, exema
Tx: plaquenil, Enbrel, Tramadol, Singulair, Skelaxin, Baby Asprin, Imuran, Prilosec, lasix, Evoxac, Celebrex, Darvocet when things get too bad, prednisone again, various vitamin/mineral supplements, cozar


Debbie Downer
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 6/5/2009 1:54 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm so sorry!! I've been in a similar state. I always trusted my husband blindly, never suspected anything. One day, I came up behind him on the computer and he closed out of it really quick. But, he hadn't closed out, he had minimized the screen. I found email to his big great ex love. I was blown away. They had been talking on the phone. This is how I found out he was unhappy. Listen, I can't tell you what to do, none of us can. It is easy when things are tough to become vulnerable to an emotional affair. From your statements, it is CLEAR that he is having an emotional affair with this woman and she with him/whether it is physical or not you may never know. I feel for you right now. Trust is the hardest thing to get back in a relationship. Ours happened 3 years ago and I still struggle with it and to this day I have no idea if he cheated physically on me. I just wanted to pretend like it never happened, but it did. You found this for a reason. Maybe it was to save your marriage. Did you see premonition with Sandra Bullock? Maybe he hasn't slept with her yet and he is planning to. The grass always looks greener on the other side. My husband has a hard time understanding an illness that he can't see. I can't pretend to understand completely how you feel. I did not find anything so blatant as I love you and I'm falling in love with your or I want you so bad. It was much more vague. Has he been acting weird, leaving, being gone longer at work? If he really is physically cheating on you, he will have slipped up somewhere. I don't want to be the downer, but now is the time to start checking phone records, text messaging, etc. If you don't know for sure, it will eat you away. I promise you that. I suggest counseling as well if you want to work it out with him. I'm so sorry you are in such a bad place. I also recommend that you tell him to delete his facebook account and all contact with this woman. Don't be shy about asking for proof either. Maybe you should speak with her as well. It might help you understand how far this has went. I will say, your marriage will never be the same, one reason to go to counseling. Finding out that your spouse has betrayed you is devasting and it will cause you to distrust him for a long time, cause you to check up on him, put doubts in your mind. It's no fun. If he wants to make things work, he will understand that it will take you a long time to get over this.

puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/5/2009 4:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all for your replies. It's so nice to have people who are so compassionate. I don't think it ever got ophysical, I think I caught him just before it got that far. I sent this woman a facebook message, first telling her I'd tell her husband about it all if she contacted my husband again, and then I wrote her back saying that I'm not that petty and wouldn't do that but to understand that two little boys may be left without a father because of all this. To make matters worse, my father in law just arrived today for a visit. I don't know what my DH told him about what's going on, but I'm not going to discuss this with him. I told DH that when hyis Dad leaves, he needs to pack his stuff and leave. I'm willing to go to joint counseling with our priest, but beyond that i'm not making any promises. I'm really amazed at how level headed I'm being, especially when all I want to do is scream at the top of my lungs and beat the crap out of DH. I can't even look him in the eyes without starting to cry again. He went out with his Dad and that's good because I really don't even want to look at him. As far as making him delete his account, well, he can always make another one. So, I changed the password so he can't use the computer at all. PLease keep the prayers and good thoughts coming, I can feel your love and support making me stronger.

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


ivy6
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Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 6/5/2009 5:41 PM (GMT -7)   
(((Jennifer)))
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SadSickTired
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 99
   Posted 6/5/2009 7:23 PM (GMT -7)   

Jennifer,

  I am so sorry for what you are going through.  It sucks and he sucks.  I went through a similar scenario with my ex-husband.  Just follow your heart.  Anyone who's been through a difficult marriage or break-up can tell you something for sure.  There comes a point when you just know its over.  A weird kind of calm comes over you when you realize that the decision is clear and you just know what you are going to do and that its the right thing for you.  And until you get to that point, anything is possible.  Don't let anyone tell you what to do or how to feel.  Do what you want and take care of you and your kids.  You and your family are in my thoughts.

                


Thanks!
Trish
 
 


PattyLatty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2570
   Posted 6/6/2009 7:36 AM (GMT -7)   
(((((Jennifer)))))

I'm so sorry you're going through this. No one deserves to be treated this way and I pray that you can work things out with the help of your clergy or counselor. I wonder how your hubby would feel if the tables were turned. He needs a wakeup call and I hope you can get him to talk and open up.

Take care,

Pat
SLE, fibro, renauds, restless leg, hiatal hernia, double vision, migraines, costocondritis.

prednisone, plaquenil, leflunomide, neurontin, synthroid, triamterene, actonel, niaspan, tri-est, cymbalta, tricor, acifex


okie
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 2818
   Posted 6/6/2009 8:19 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Jennifer, Sometimes these stupid computers can get people in a lot of trouble doing and saying thing you would never dream of doing in person. Your husband is probably in love with the idea of the carefree easy going times of school.

I am absolutely in no way justifying what happened but if you love him and he loves you you both need to do what ever you can to make it work. Not for the kids because I think that's a cop out when I heard we stayed together for the kids. Ask any kid who lives with parents that fought all the time it's no picnic for them. Marriage is so hard sometimes but it can be so fulfilling too.

Like the others said get counseling talk to your preist talk to each other. My husband ands I used to fight like cats and dogs. but when had great times too. Then when I was 42 he died. I wish I had back all those hours and days back that we wasted fighting or not talking to each other. If you want to stay with him fight for your marriage don't look back 10 years from now and say I wish I had tried a little hard.

hugs

carol 


 CAROL
Possible scleroderma.  stage 4 COPD, sleep apnea, Osteoporosis,osteoarthritis
Prednisone,plaquanil400mg,azythromyacin,vicodin 4x5mg,Evista60mg, Effexor 150mg,Xanax 1.0 x3,Singular,nitro spray, provigil 200mg spirivia,aciphex,lasix ,pot.chlor.,B12 ,iNDEROL
 
Bear ye one another's burdens
Galatians 6:2 KJV

 
 


puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/6/2009 3:12 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all so much. I've lost all trust in him, I can't even look at him. I couldn't sleep at all last night, not one wink. Can't take a nap because kids are still up and hubby is out with his Dad. I'm glad they left because I just can't make anymore awkard small talk. I can't wait until he leaves. Anyone else feel a major flare coming?

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


MJLD
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1048
   Posted 6/6/2009 3:22 PM (GMT -7)   
I just wanted to say i'm so sorry that this is happening.  I can't imagine what you're going through.  I will be praying for you and your family.  Hang in there.  Judy

puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/7/2009 7:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Well, everyone here's the update. I decided not to leave him, but there are some ground rules. No more computer secrets. All passwords are to shared and I will check up on his facebook and email until I regain more trust in him. There are to be no inappropriate friends on his list, no flirting, etc. I also told him that if this or anything like this ever happens again there will no more chances, and me and the kids will be gone. I am flaring horribly today, I can barely walk around the house and I can't pick up the baby. I was up for 34 hours through all this mess and I'll be paying for it through the week. I told him that my body cannot handle this kind of strain and I will not go through this again. My children need me to function as best as I can. Somewhere along the way things got really screwed up and we started drifting. We have to work together if we're going to find a way to live with Lupus. It will be more work and more planning but it is the only way we're going to be able to live with any kind of happiness. We are still going to meet with our priest and try to find what got lost along the way. We had such a deep connection once and if we can find it again we'll be able to get through this. I want to thank everyone for all the support and kind words, it really meant a lot to know that you all care so very much. God bless each and everyone of you.

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


NanciLee
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 47
   Posted 6/8/2009 3:52 AM (GMT -7)   

well, this subject touched me. My husband of 10 years had a mental fling with a much younger waitress that flirted with him everytime he when in which turned into everyday.  They started calling , then texting then I found an email that florred me.  "I've never felt this way before," "I think about you every second" " "you are the sexiest women that every lived". These are just a few of the phrases that crushed me.  I forgave him and we moved on, but I never trusted him or believed him and that distrust ate at out marraige.  One day he told me a little lie and I snapped like a twig and threw him out and I swear to God, I divorced him in 3 months.

3 months after the divorce was final, we started dating. Its been 2.5 years and I will NOT marry him. I feel this is the best way for me. Now, the only way I would marry him is if I needed great health insurance,

bottom line, do what is best for you. Maybe I moved to quickly. Maybe I shoudl ahve gone to see someone. I don't know. I do love him and I still have moments of distrust. BUT I CAN WALK AWAY if I want, and that keeps both of us on our toes.

PS, I was partly responsible for his mental cheating. I will never tell him that!!


 


LovedbyHim
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 98
   Posted 6/8/2009 5:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Jennifer, I don't have a computer on weekends so i got this today. My heart is heavy as I know how it feel s to be cheated on. My first thought is that boundries need to be set.He really can not use the computer, because he crossed the line. Second, God' word says you are free to go. However, I would pray and wait upon God as to what He would have you do. I know to marriages in my church right, that are sticking it out after an affair. I admire them for it, because I could not. I divorced, because the trust think made me sick every day. Perhaps marraige counseling would help. Please try to remember, you are beautiful and very special in God's eyes, no matter what happens. Love and prayers, Tammy

I have SLE, Raynauds, mitrol valve prolapse,Haushimotos thyroiditis.
 
Meds I'm on are Prednisone, Vitamin D, Hydroxchloiquin, amitriptylin, levoxyl, colchcine, mobic, flexeril, and lyrica
 
Rom 8:18-19 "I consider that my present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." 


Debbie Downer
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 6/8/2009 6:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm glad you came to a decision. Although, do read what Nancilee said. She is right. Distrust will eat away at your marriage. Don't expect it to go away, it will stay with you for a long time. I'm still get angry at my husband at times for no reason other than it makes me furious that he did this to me. It is almost like I am the one who has to suffer because of his mistake. He took trust away from me. He MADE me this girl who is insecure, checks up on him, reads his emails, looks at his text messages, and checks phone records. It's heartbreaking to know that I am that girl now and I will never be the way I used to be. I miss that so much. The thing is, your husband will move on. He will think you have too. You might even think you have. And, then, bam, like nancilee said he will lie to you about something small or whatever and it will bring it all back. He won't understand either because it's in the past to him. You forgave him. He won't want to talk about it anymore so you will keep it to yourself and it will eat away. Every now and then, when I am having a perfectly happy serene moment with my husband, it will sneak into my head and destroy the moment. It's sad. Trust is just the hardest thing to get back. Have you seen the movie, "he's just not that into you" The wife finds out her husband is cheating on her and is willing to forgive him. However later, she finds a pack of cigarettes in his pocket and realizes he has been lying to her about smoking and she ends up freaking out and throwing him out and getting a divorce. You are going to need a lot of counseling and make him talk to you about this until he's sick of it. You need to understand what caused this to happen, what his thought processes are that led him to this emotional affair. I almost left my husband a couple of years ago because I found a text message he sent to that girl and it said simply "old times" and she wrote back "good times". This is a girl who he swore he never had an affair with. Just an acquaintance someone who worked for him yet he called at 3 am and used to spend time with her outside of work. Yeah, and I never met her. Some acquaintance/friend. She was a waitress that worked for him. He was her boss. Those text messages haunt me seriously. I know it sounds silly, but they scream intimacy. When I asked him about it, he denied knowing that number. I ended up calling her and finding out who it was. This is what pops into my head when he is being extra romantic and I feel really happy. "old times, good times". I just have this sinking feeling that it was more than an emotional affair. It really eats away at me. If I had found anything that said "I want you" or "I love you", I would of left him. That is just me though. I do not trust easily and I would of never have forgiven him. Look at hard it is for me to forgive him and I have no proof of anything more than a "old times" "good times" and some 3 am calls and a few times going out to a bar after work. I wish you the best of luck. I hope you guys can pull through this and I pray he has realized what an idiot he has been and is truly there for you now as he should be. God bless your family!!

Post Edited (Debbie Downer) : 6/8/2009 7:38:45 AM (GMT-6)


puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/8/2009 7:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you Debbie and i'm so sorry that you can relate to this situation. I must tell you all that my DH is a wonderful but sometimes simple man. Things have been really hard for everyone here with me being sick for over two years now. I think I told everyone about how when I was pregnant he gained weight, had pains and nausea. He cares so deeply for me that he feels my suffering. There has been very little joy in house and the pain had made us drift further and further apart. He was looking for happiness and joy and went looking in the wrong place. He felt helpless because he couldn't fix me, most men are very defeated by problems they can't fix. This in no way makes his actions right or hurt any less. I'm at the start of a huge flare and will be spending much of the few days in bed as much as possible. Yesterday I could barely walk. We are going to meet with our priest to find what we lost along this painful process. He knows I'll be checking up on him and I also told him there will be no more chances. If anything like this or even any inappropriate relations ever happen again, I am gone. I will not put my body or my heart through this again. We have a long road to recovery ahead of us, but I honestly think he understands what's at stake. Pray for us, we're going to need it. God Bless you all.

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


dbab
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 4151
   Posted 6/8/2009 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
God Bless you and give you the strength to work through this for you and your family.  Only you know what is right for you as you are the one that knows what is best in your situation.  Whatever that might be, I wish you happiness.
 
Please take care of yourself through this flare.  Will be thinking of you!
Dx: IBS 1989, Diverticulosis 2004, Idiopathic Acute Colitis 2006, UCTD 2007, Localized Scleroderma 2009
 
Meds: Plaquenil 400mg/day, Pred 2.5 mg/day (tapering), Methotrexate 10mg/week, Hydrocodone PRN, Fiorinal PRN, Baby aspirin, Prenatal Multi, Vit E, B12, Fish Oil, Biotin, Calcium, Folic Acid


puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/8/2009 10:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all so much for all the support and kind words. I know that meeting with our priest will help us get through this. My husband told me he was glad I found out because his head was getting all mixed up and although he says he was never planning that the relationship get physical,(I'm begining to believe that he did not sleep with her) it probably would have gotten out of hand. Last night he was looking at me with tears streaming down his face and he said, "Honey, what the hell was I thinking? You are so beautiful and I love you more then anything. I am so sorry." There was true sincerity in his eyes. He also was very emotional seeing how much physical pain I was in, a major stress flare up, I could barely walk yesterday because the inflammation is now all of a sudden in my left knee. He said that he knew it was his fault that I was hurting so much and I told him, "yes, it is. Never again." He is well aware of the consequences should he stray in the slightest of ways. One thing all of this has done is make me rediscover my own inner strength. I was strong enough to stand up for myself and to know that I deserve better then to be treated like this, I know that I am a strong and beautiful person and nothing anyone else does to me or even anthing that Lupus does to me will ever take that away from me again. God will always love me and He suffers with me, so I am never alone. Take care of yourselves and God Bless.

P.S. I'm taking better care of my appearance these days and it really helps me feel better about myself. I had given up on how looked beccause of the moon-face, potbelly, and hairloss. Make-up, new hair cut and fancy acrylic nails should be covered by insurace companies. LOL

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


Julia Hill
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 543
   Posted 6/8/2009 7:43 PM (GMT -7)   
I hope everything works out for you and your family. Always remember the look of sincerity on your husbands face. Sometimes we always find it easier to remember the things that hurt us instead of the things that brought us peace. What he did was wrong, but maybe you will now have a new beginning, and your marriage will be stronger than ever. Maybe you should make a point of going out for dinner, or a movie once a week (date night). All the best to you both, and I hope your Lupus gets better.


Julia

elcamino
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 1744
   Posted 6/9/2009 7:46 AM (GMT -7)   

Jennifer,

I'm very sorry to hear about your situation.  I just wanted to offer you some hope.  My husband did cheat on me once several years ago.  It was right after my mother had passed away and we had just learned that we had fertility issues (male issues) which prevented us from getting pregnant.  I know how devastating it is to have that trust shattered, and how difficult it is to gain back.  Despite statistics, we chose to go through counseling.  Because of counseling, and because we had started attending a church together for the first time in our marriage, we are still together 8 years (and 2 children) later.  If your husband is amenable to it, I highly recommend you talk to someone as a couple (or separately, if you have to), whether it is a professional counselor or a minister/pastor. 

Although I feel as though I have truly forgiven my husband for his infidelity, there isn't a day that doesn't go by that I don't still think of it.  You and your husband can recover as a couple, though, if you want to pursue that.  Some people don't ever get over the initial hurt.

Blessings to you,

El


Current dx: Rheumatoid Arthritis
Suspected dx: UCTD/Early Lupus
Current Meds: Enbrel, Plaquenil, Methotrexate, nexium, tramadol, nasonex,Tylenol PM
Past Meds: Relafen, Vioxx, Mobic, Voltaren, Sulfasalazine, Entocort, Prednisone, Humira, Reglan, zyrtec, zegerid, aciphex


Debbie Downer
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 6/9/2009 12:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Good Luck! That husband of yours is a very lucky guy! I hope he realizes it this time and makes good on his promises. If you ever need to vent than vent away. It will be difficult to overcome and you can't do it alone. If you ever feel overwhelmed by your feelings, understand that it's perfectly normal and don't be afraid to come on here and let it out. Take care of yourself. I hope you feel better soon! :-)

tink 2
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 371
   Posted 6/9/2009 4:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi see if your local hospital has councling for spouses who has a ill spouse. Do not know if they have something like this but it is worth a try.   Good luck my husband and I went threw something simular...   It is hard to deal with....  That is when my Lupus showed itself.
                    Good luck D 
Lupus since 2005, Fiberomyalgia since 2006,  sjogren's syndrome since 2005,  diabetes since 2006, Depression since 2004. who would not be with all of this.
 
       I just try to make it threw every day as best I can.
        God please remember I am on the diet platter.
                  So many beads so little time.....
 
                   Have a great Lupie Day Denise 


puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/10/2009 9:08 AM (GMT -7)   
This is soooooo hard. I've made the decision to stay, I do love my husband very much and I know he loves me, too. And we have two very small children. It's just hard to live with the hurt. You know Lupus pain doesn't hurt that much. Yesterday I went to the store and while I was out I thought, "what if he's calling her right now"? Then I thought about how happy he was the day he had lied to me to go meet her, when he swears he didn't sleep with her. How I wish I could get this crap out of my head. We're still going to meet with our priest, we just have to arrange a babysitter first and wait for father in law to leave tomorrow. This suck so much. Last couple of days I upped my pred to 20 mg just to ward off the huge flare that was comming, I think it worked. So far I'm doing better physically, but I'm still so angry that he made me go through this. ARRGGGGHH!!!!

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


puccini914
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/15/2009 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey everyone, Well, tonite we go to meet with our priest. My stomach is in knots, I'm in major flare and I'm taking alot more pain meds then I should be. You're just not going to believe this. Thursday night I asked my husband if there was anything unresolved with this woman because I just didn't want any surprises, he said no. Well, Friday when I went to talk to our priest to get my side of everything out, he got on the computer and set up a new email account, since I had the passwords to other one. He said he just wanted to make sure she wasn't going to call the house or anything. ARRRGGGHHH!!! I just want to scream. I made him give me the password and I checked her reply and it was a goodbye saying she knew what they did was wrong and to have a nice life. I just can't believe he couldn't tell me when I asked and had to try to sneak contact with her. I'm so sick of the lies, I don't trust him or believe anything he says. It just kills me because I love him so much, but I feel like I'm the least important thing in his life. I desreve so much more then this. Thanks again for everyone's support.

Jennifer

PCP pretty convinced- Lupus , Taking plaquenil,Propranolol,  Flexeril,Claritin, Zantac,Ambien,vitamin B-12, multi- vitamin, Lortab.  Prednisone 15mg daily added 03/09.   Mom of 2 boys 1 and 6.  Symptoms: Fatigue, joint pain, heat/sun sensitivity, mouth and nose sores, malar rash, migranes, awful hives, positive ANA, and RF.

 

 


SmurfyShadow
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 2386
   Posted 6/17/2009 11:36 PM (GMT -7)   
Ive been pretty upset with my finacee to. Similar case. He kept asking for my best friends phone number. I gave in, thought it would be good for him to have more friends since he has few. I let them go out a few times alone to establish a friendship. A few months ago out of the blue I started accusing him of cheating on me. I found out last month, he kissed her. I confronted him, he denied, so I pulled my phone out where I had it in text message and said "you want to try that again or should I show you the text message." He looked shocked, told me it was nothing and it wasnt cheating cuz it was just a kiss. He's more open to me now, and showing me a lot more love like he used to. You are in my prayers while you go through this. I personally refuse him to have any contact with her anymore. Said if she's around and they want to do something I'm going end of discussion to him. He understands. I think he is dumbfounded that I sensed it. When you find that right one, things just uhh clicks you know what I mean, its just too hard to describe it!
 
Smurfy Shadow/Desirèe 
DX: Wegener's Disease, Migraines, Diabetese Type II, PCOS, Lactose Intolerant, Benign Heart Murmer, Depression, Asthma, Asperger's Syndrome, Necrotizing Gramultous Inflamation in eye, A.D.D., Acid Reflux, Tumor Behind the Eye, Carpal Tunnel, Fibromyolgia, Clasterphobic, Arthritis
Medications:  Tri Nessa, Percocet, Metformin, Prilosec, Protonix, Zantac, Advair, Cingulair, Albuterol, Calcium + Vitamin D, Pro-Air, Pepcid, Rolaids, Zofran, Compuzeen, Refresh Plus Eye Drops  PRN: Epi-Pen, Albuterol Nebulizer, Benedryl
Undergoing Radiation Taking Lorazepam (Ativan) on Radiation Days

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