Emotional/Anger Issues

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hiswife
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 12/17/2008 1:30 AM (GMT -6)   
I am brand new to this forum.  My husband has been diagnosed with MS for about 2 years. 
At the time of his diagnosis he worked in a very phyiscally intense job and now has moved into a job that is still physical in nature, but no where the same extent. Due to this, it was hard to get a good idea of what was work related and what was MS related.  Since he and I married nearly 6 years ago, his temper has increased significantly.  He tells me that he cannot control his outbursts/rages and that it feels like his head is on fire (with rage).  His MRI shows multiple lesions in his frontal lobe.  I want to know if anyone has experienced any symptoms like this and if so do you know of any medications/treatments that could help? I have been told that this is the dark side of MS and is not openly talked about, but as a frustrated (and emotionally spent) wife I need to talk about it with someone - so please someone break the silence.
 
Thanks in advance.

Gretchen1
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3521
   Posted 12/17/2008 8:05 AM (GMT -6)   

Welcome to the forum,

Wow!  You need some help here.  Your husband needs to make an appointment with his neuro and you need to go along.  You both need to talk openly with the doctor about what you are both seeing and experiencing.  Your husband cannot be happy like this and I can only imagine your frustration!!!  You both need some support here, whether it be medical, therapuetic or both. 

I am far from an expert but I have heard that damage to the frontal lobe can cause personality changes.  Is your husband on a progressoin therapy?  I am sorry I don't have a real helpful answer here.  I want you to know that you are very welcome here and we will support as much as we possibly can.  I hope you will keep us posted as to how you are both doing.


Gretchen       co-moderator MS board       diagnosed with MS July 2006
 
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.


rhondab
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2146
   Posted 12/17/2008 10:11 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey Friend

Welcome to the forum. I too don't have any real answers here, but wanted to say we're glad u'r here and hope u'll stay. U both do need some support on this. Have u talked with him about maybe an MS support group?? If u two could go together it could be so valuable to u. It can help him to see others who face this and HOW they manage it. He seems to need some coping tools (as well as u) and i'd suspect learning those in person from those who use them will be much more helpful. We will be right here for u both friend. Don't try to go this alone. Rage and anger can be hard to understand. U can't really get thru to the angry person and of course u'r feeling is to respond angrily as well. Hang in there friend. U are doing great. Keep reaching out. U will get thru this.
rhonda
Co-Moderator, MS Forum
 
*~*Sometimes the Lord calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child.*~*
 
Things that make u go hummmm......
*I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.*
*One day without sunshine is like...um..well...night?*


Sweetlydia66
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 260
   Posted 12/17/2008 3:02 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey there,
Being diagnosed with a chronic illness is very hard to accept. Gretchen and Rhondas advice to seek some help regarding this is the best place to start i think. I know just from my experience alone, i had a real hard time accepting this. My temper was absolutely rediculous. I would fly off the handle at the drop of a hat. It wasn't until my mother in law was visiting us and i had a melt down in front of her, did i realize i needed some help dealing with this. She told me that this was not me, and that i deffinately needed to talk to someone. I m so glad i did because i feel so much better about things. I think i was just so mad, and so frustrated at this darn disease, and why me why me all the time, that i seemed to forget what was important. My neuro gave me cymbalta. It is an antidepressant but it also used to treat nerve pain. So it is a 2 fer for me. I am not saying he is depressed, just telling my story. But, It is so wonderful to feel like myself again. I never even took an aspirin, and i think that is why i was so hesitant to ask for something to help me cope, but you have to have some quality of life. He deserves to be happy and so do you. Be as supportive as you can. Maybe he is having a hard time getting to the acceptance phase of this awful disease. Definately seek help from your doctor. You all just have to take the first step. There is help out there! I wish you and your husband the best. Keep us updated, were here to help any way we can.
Lynn
Dx MS December, 2006
Started Tysabri March, 2008
Zanaflex as needed
Cymbalta


hiswife
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 12/18/2008 1:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks everyone for the advice. I am glad to see we are not the only ones out there dealing with a similar problem. I am trying to encourage him to begin going to a support group with me.

Gretchen1
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3521
   Posted 12/18/2008 8:19 AM (GMT -6)   
That is a great way to start.  You are doing some good thinking on this.  If he sees others willing to talk about this disease perhaps he will feel more willing to open up.  Good luck and let us know how you are doing.

Gretchen       co-moderator MS board       diagnosed with MS July 2006
 
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.


robin smith
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 12/18/2008 9:50 AM (GMT -6)   
I have just been diagnosed 7 months ago and I would love to communicate with people who are battling the same thing as me. I feel so alone, but I know there are millions of people out there that have the same thing as me. I am trying to find support groups or different sites where I am able to communicate with other people. If you can help me that would be great.

Thank you
 
Mod Note: Please put u'r personal contact information in u'r member profile. This is for u'r protection against spammers trolling. Any member who needs to contact u will be able to click on u'r user name and access u'r email address. Please let me or the other mod know if u need any assistance in getting this set up.

Post Edited By Moderator (rhondab) : 12/18/2008 9:09:32 AM (GMT-7)


rhondab
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2146
   Posted 12/18/2008 10:10 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey Robin!

Welcome to the board! I'm so sorry for u'r recent diagnoses, but really glad u've found us and hope u'll post often and let us get to know u. We have a great community of people here who are all willing to do what they can to help u get answers or just offer support when u need to vent. Again, welcome to the board.
rhonda
Co-Moderator, MS Forum
 
*~*Sometimes the Lord calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child.*~*
 
Things that make u go hummmm......
*I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.*
*One day without sunshine is like...um..well...night?*


bohuck2
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 196
   Posted 12/30/2008 1:30 PM (GMT -6)   
Hiswife,
Please listen to Gretchen and make an appointment for him at his Neurologist's office. You need to go along and tell the neuro just what his actions are, I know because my wife goes along with me and tells my neuro tales about me that irritate her but my Neuro usually has a solution for us. Yours probably does also. Good luck and God Bless You!
Happy New Year my new friend!
 
 
 
 
                                           Chuck Huckaba
                                    AMWTP Training Instructor
                                          Idaho Falls, Idaho
                                  Diagnosed with PPMS May, 2007
                                   but still working at the present.


tiredoffighting
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2012
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 9/6/2012 5:11 PM (GMT -6)   
My heart goes out to you. It is a very difficult thing to live with someone that cant control their angry outbursts. It is especially hard when they dont show any remorse for how they have so negatively affected their loved ones. My soon to be ex wife, her choice and i will spare the details, is/was at first verbally/phsycologically, then physically abusive to me. She constantly called me worthless, and told me that she hated me. She would often throw things at me and break my things. Allthis while i told her that i still loved her. If you plan on staying with you husband, i strongly recomend that you seek family counseling, and try to get him into a phyciatrist to help him. In my my expdrience it is best not to confront or argue back as people with ms tend not to lisren to reasonable arguements. That is all i have time for. GOOD LUCK.
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