First off, I am truely sorry I only pop in when I need something and yet manage to never show up to provide anyone else support. Those of you who know/remember me know I have a very full plate.
So heres what I did. My Wifes health had gotten worse in these last few weeks and it added a TON of stress to my life. I already was struggling with a phycological block when doing injections and that was just too much. So since Jan 31st I've had one. I've tried more than that but been unable too pull the trigger. The other night I gave up and was going to empty the syringe down the toilet and coulden't pull the trigger on my betaject even then. I had to unload it and push the pluger manualy.
The reality I am now facing is, the numbness I had on my left side last summer that went compleatly away is starting to creep back. I noticed a few days ago both of my feet were kind of tingly. Tonight I noticed it has creeped all the way up my left leg to my thigh.
Now maybe this means nothing and maybe it is just old leasions rearing their ugly heads. Maybe it will go no further but I do suspect based on past experiance that it is my fault. Last Feb ('06) I was having a hard time with my injections and wound up with the optic nuritis that cost me much of the vision in my left eye for good.
I feel like such a failuer. I work so hard to take care of my family, and what sholud be one of the easiest things I do to take care of them, my injections, I fail at. Now before anyone jumps in, I don't say this to get anyone to tell me "it's ok" or "don't be so hard on yourself" I just know you all face some of the same problems. I am not looking for a pat on the head or absolution, I just knew you all would understand my rant.
Thanks for listening. I want you all to know while I may not post much, I do try to pop in here and read in spare moments. You are all often in my thoughts.
Take care all - Pete
"If you don't talk to your cat about catnip who will" - CCL
Post Edited (Papa_Bear) : 2/23/2007 11:41:04 PM (GMT-7)