Feeling really depressed

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sfgiantsjo
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 420
   Posted 2/27/2008 9:35 PM (GMT -6)   
So, this is a little personal, but I'm feeling really sad right now. I have a close group of friends that are all married. A couple are already pregnant, and the rest are actively trying. I can't even try because I still need to have one, possibly two more surgeries. I want kids. I'm 32, so it's not like I have forever. Now all my friends will have kids and I won't. I know I'm being whiney, but it's bugging me today. I guess because the last one of my friends, who was always my not pregnant buddy, told me today that she and her husband are going to start trying and charting. :( I'm also so so scared that the surgery has affected my fertility - what if we can't get pg even when we can try?
Seriously, even single one of my close friends are pg or trying. I'm sad. Thanks for listening.
UC diagnosed: December, 1999
Asacol: 1600 MG daily
Immuran: 150 MG daily
Prednisone: 4 MG daily (Woo-Hooo! Getting lower and lower!)
Remicade: Infusion every 7 weeks
Probiotics 4 billion CFU Daily
Glutamine 500 mg 2x Daily
 
OFF all meds!! Liver failure, and emergency surgery as soon as liver levels return to normal. ACK!
 
Surgery August 24, 2007. Home now!


Ash83
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 128
   Posted 2/27/2008 9:44 PM (GMT -6)   
I understand all too well how you're feeling. I have major fears that my surgery has left me with fertility problems. I'm terrified that my body won't be able to carry a healthy baby to term. It's hard because right now I should have two babies with me. My girls would be almost 5 months, had they been born at term. It's hard waking up to the reality everyday.
 
It seems as soon as I came home from the hospital, everyone and their mother was pregnant, trying to get pregnant, or just gave birth. Even now I'm surrounded by it. It's hard to be happy for those who easily have what we so desperately want.
 
All I can say is take it one day at a time. That's what I've done and it's gotten me 9 months so far. Long enough to have another kid by now! Your time is going to come, without a doubt. It's hard to be patient and optimistic, but both are key.
 
 
Is your next surgery going to be a reversal? I've decided if I'm a candidate I'm going to wait on the reversal and add on to our family first. I don't want my body invaded anymore than it already has been. I'd rather live with this bag for the rest of my life than go without children. It's a no brainer for me.
 
 
There's always a solution to every problem, issue, or worry. So sleep well knowing it's going to work out, one way or another.
 

praying4healing
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 739
   Posted 2/28/2008 4:02 PM (GMT -6)   
I wrote a really long response to u sf, and for somereason it disappeared!

N e way, it boiled down to this
I'm 25 and i constantly tell myself that due to my illness and the circumstances i've been thru w/this bag and so forth in the last 2 years, that i don't want kids or marriage. But i know i tell myself these things because i know that there's a possiblity these things wont happen (i'm glad you have someone in your life who loves and cares about u no matter what).

I was saying how i have no sisters, but i have a bunch of female cousins whom are like my sisters. We all grew up together. And all of them are either married and/or have children, even the younger ones! Imagine how i felt when my younger cousins graduated from college b4 me! all b/c i was sick. I did eventually finish, but things like this have been a constant reminder throughout my life of how this illness has changed and affected my life.

But i'm a firm believer in the philosophy that "What God has for you is for you!), and no circumstance, age, or sickness can take that away from you. You don't know what's in store for your future!

Bsides smile! 32 isnt old! my mom has a few friends who waited until their early 40's to have children...wouldnt necessarily be my choice, but its not uncommon. You have time.....
Feel better
25 y/o female- crohns disease since 14
Ileostomy pending-very worried
Tried asacol,pentasa,prednisone,remicade,6mp,azasan, no avail
Seatons placed
Worst year ever!

"For God has not given us the spirit of fear....."
Where does mine come from?!
 
Temp Ileostomy performed 1/29/08
Still Adusting
 
Healingwell.com has been my Godsend...Thank you


peggy113
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1998
   Posted 2/28/2008 5:13 PM (GMT -6)   
Sending hugs your way, SF. I totally understand as I was unable to have children due to hysterectomy at age 24. So, I really do relate. Just hang in there - one day at a time and don't fret. Keep your chin up and keep a positive attitude.

Hugs,
Peggy
      
Diagnosed with CD in 1979, many resections and meds
Perm Ileostomy July 1984 at Cleveland Clinic
Disease free since surgery 
 


donut
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 54
   Posted 2/28/2008 10:55 PM (GMT -6)   
I was 34 years old when I had to have a hysterectomy due to endometriosis. My husband and I went through seven years of infertility..surgery, drugs, pain. It was a horrible time, especially when everyone in the family asked when I was ever going to have kids. I am now 53 and have two beautiful adopted daughters who are now 18 and 20. If I hadn't gone through all of that pain..I wouldn't be their mom. You really never know where life will lead you..even when things seem hopeless. I now try to have the same attitude as I have dealt with the colon surgery, fistula and ileostomy. Tomorrow is my reversal and I am so excited! I know that my ostomy has only been temporary, but I remember those feelings when I was young dealing with a devastating disease. New medical breakthroughs, better drugs...you never know what good things are ahead. Good luck to you!

praying4healing
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 739
   Posted 2/28/2008 11:16 PM (GMT -6)   
be blessed thru ur surgery 2morow donut!
25 y/o female- crohns disease since 14
Ileostomy pending-very worried
Tried asacol,pentasa,prednisone,remicade,6mp,azasan, no avail
Seatons placed
Worst year ever!

"For God has not given us the spirit of fear....."
Where does mine come from?!
 
Temp Ileostomy performed 1/29/08
Still Adusting
 
Healingwell.com has been my Godsend...Thank you

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