Sheesh, that's bad. Nothing like kicking you when you are down. Have you thought about counseling, both individual and together? No matter what you decide, you need to concentrate on your recovery. You can postpone your reversal for as long as you like.
i went through near enough the same thing as you when i got sick. i have been with me boyf six years this year. we are not married or anything but have been together since we were teenagers.
i must admit i was being a total b***h with him most of the time but that is no excuse. i was sick and depressed and just needed support which he did kinda give me, he stuck be me through it all but i didnt realise he was text messaging another woman behind my back. i can usually tell when something is happening and when he started hiding his phone from me i got suspicious. i found text messages from this other woman on his phone calling him babe and so obviously flirting with him. i told him it was over and that i couldnt trust him but we decided to give it another try. although it took me a while to trust him again. i was so paranoid whenever he went out or anywhere basically. he aways told me that nothing ever happened between them and it was just friendly but i knew better.
not only was he doing this but it was with someone i knew and who i couldnt stand! she knew we were together, always has. i also know what king of gal she was so i knew it wasnt just friendly on her part.i just had to learn to trust him again but its not easy as you probably know.well thats my story thought you might like to know your not alone.