I am meeting my surgeon today - I have never been this scared

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schrek-chewbacca hunk
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Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 2666
   Posted 1/26/2009 11:59 AM (GMT -6)   
Even after 8 surgeries last year for Charkot disease, and 6 months away from home - I am feeling like a scared little boy.  I know in my head this is the right thing to do and my suffering on the whole will be gone, I keep coming around to dreading the surgery itself and the pain that recovery requires.
 
I don't even know why I am writing this, because I don't know what kind of response I am looking for. 
 
Please forgive my pity party and emotional response to this.
 
Thanks and love to all
bob

Bennie
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 551
   Posted 1/26/2009 12:28 PM (GMT -6)   
Hugs to you, Bob. You have every right to be scared. It still is major surgery even if you know it will help in the long run. Remember we are all with you (if not physically then in spirit). Vent here anytime. It really does help.

--Mom of bratcat (17 years old) and nonamejames (20 years old)--
Daughter bratcat was diagnosed with pancolitis October 2006
Flared Fall 2006, Fall 2007, Spring 2008
Asacol, Rowasa, hydrocortisone enemas, prednisone, 6-mp, Remicade
7/3/08-Step 1 j-pouch surgery and no more meds!
11/10/08-Step 2 reconnect!
 
Son nonamejames was diagnosed with Crohns in Spring 2008
Asacol, Pentasa, 6-mp


Equestrian Mom
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 3115
   Posted 1/26/2009 4:37 PM (GMT -6)   
Keep your chin up! You'll be fine:)

Never worry about venting here...we don't judge!

summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 1/26/2009 5:43 PM (GMT -6)   
yep complain away! i sure do it plenty, lol
its so normal to be scared, in fact it would be weird if you weren't!
but just keep it remembering that the surgery pain is only temporary!

flchurchlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 2765
   Posted 1/26/2009 6:24 PM (GMT -6)   
((((HUG))))
 
It's completely normal to be nervous. Don't forget, they'll give you excellent pain medicine, too! wink


Dx'd Crohn's in '99 at 28. Proctocolectomy and ileostomy in '06.
Disease-free, medicine-free, and very thankful to be healthy again :)


Chasblah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 788
   Posted 1/26/2009 8:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Love the pain meds!!! If you can, I'd request an epidural. I had one for my colectomy and I didn't feel anything. One nurse came in and was pulling on my bandages and was like "Wow, you must not feel anything if this doesn't hurt you" NOPE! And I had a pain pump after the epidural came out.

Hey, we all have pity parties and we're all here to listen and support. B/c that's what this site if for!!!!!!!!
Chassity
28 yrs. old. married with one beautiful daughter (born 11/20/07)
-diagnosed with severe pancolitis u/c 2002 had total colectomy 12/19/08; emergency surgery due to abscess-had to redo ileostomy and switch to left side 12/25/08; 1/29/08 found blood clot in superior mesenteric vein (prob. from inf. and surgery inflammation)
pred. taper, zofran, immodium, lovonox, coumadin, carafate, prenatal vit., and pain meds
(ileostomy temporary....not so sure?)

"Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out."


summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 1/26/2009 10:02 PM (GMT -6)   
morphine is def your friend, lol.

peggy113
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1998
   Posted 1/27/2009 4:17 AM (GMT -6)   
Bob,
I didn't get a chance to check posts on here yesterday, but now that you have met with your surgeon, how did it go?

Hey, we all do the pitty-party thing. And we all support each other. Never feel guilty about that. I am sure, out of this whole group, that you will find at least one person that feels the way that you do. Hey, I have EGD's done annually, almost, and I am fine til they roll me into the procedure room. I just burst into tears - can't control it. Always do it. My GI is starting to give me extra drugs as soon as I arrive so he doesn't have to see me cry!!! I think it is fear that the procedure won't work for me (stretching my stomach). Enough about my story.

See, we all have pitty parties!!!
Peggy
      
Diagnosed with CD in 1979, many resections and meds
Perm Ileostomy July 1984 at Cleveland Clinic
Disease free since surgery 
 


suebear
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 5692
   Posted 1/27/2009 10:22 AM (GMT -6)   

Bob,

I was scared too but after my first consultation with my surgeon I felt relieved.  I knew from my surgeon's confidence that he could fix me once and for all.  He was the only doctor I had in over 2 years that said I would feel better after he operated and he was right.  I know from where you are sitting that you cannot imagine a life different than the one you have but it will be better.  You will be surprised at how those two body parts, the colon and rectum, can make you feel worse in other places.  The toxicity has been dragging you down.  I hope and pray for your renewed health, you deserve it!

Sue


dx proctitis in 1987
dx UC in 1991, was stable until 1998

1998 started prednisone, asacol, pentasa, nortriptylene, ativan, 6MP, rowasa enemas and suppositories, hydrocortisone enemas, tried the SCD diet, being a vegetarian, omega 3s, flax, pranic healing, yoga, acupuncture, probiotics

2000 lost all my B-12 stores and became anemic

2001 opted for j-pouch surgery- now living life med-free


flchurchlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 2765
   Posted 1/27/2009 11:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Bob,

I tried to back out of my ileostomy surgery the day before while in the hospital, because I was so scared. I had to have four (yes, four) GI doctors and the Ostomy Nurse convince me that I had to have it done, because my colon was in such bad shape. So, no worries, you are in good company here! :-)

Cecilia

P.S. - I'm really glad I had it done.
Dx'd Crohn's in '99 at 28. Proctocolectomy and ileostomy in '06.
Disease-free, medicine-free, and very thankful to be healthy again :)


schrek-chewbacca hunk
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 2666
   Posted 1/28/2009 2:14 PM (GMT -6)   

Well, It was quite a vivid desription of what they are planning to do.  Although I thought the surgeon was someone I could have confidence in...I have had a lot of complication with the surgeries that were supposed to have me walking by now (from Charcot Disease)...so when he said that I was a good candidate for my surgery amd everything should be fine.  I know how things can go south (hence my irrational fear).

He said that I could be looking at impotence and urinary incontinence as side effects from the surgery. 

Will I be swapping one incontinence for another? (fecal vs. urinary?).

I am prepping this evening for my colo tomorrow morning.  The surgeon is going to observe the colo.  That impressed me that he was willing to clear his schedule for my colo tomorrow morning.  I was impressed.

So, I am still very fixated on the operation process steps that he so vividly described.  I haven't been able to sleep too much, my poor wife.

I will be better after the colo tomorrow - I am just dreading the prep (you would think I would be an old pro by now!)

Anywho, I also found out that this surgeon did some surgery on my GI.  Also a bonus.  I really love and trust my GI - so this is very good for my unsettled nerves.

I will let you know how the colo goes on Friday.

Love to all

bob

 

 

 

 


Equestrian Mom
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 3115
   Posted 1/28/2009 5:07 PM (GMT -6)   
now that is a vote of confidence from your GI!!

There is a current thread from"crazybirdman" about the guy thing...you might want to check that out.

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. good luck:)

Ohio43
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 212
   Posted 1/30/2009 12:22 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Bob!

Hope all goes well for you today. Where are you having your surgery? Just wondering. I've been going up to the Cleveland Clinic. Are you in the U.S.?

Mary

peggy113
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1998
   Posted 1/30/2009 1:44 AM (GMT -6)   
Hello Bob --- well, what's the news on the colonoscopy? Waiting for an upate....
Peggy
      
Diagnosed with CD in 1979, many resections and meds
Perm Ileostomy July 1984 at Cleveland Clinic
Disease free since surgery 
 


Lonie
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 6447
   Posted 2/6/2009 1:22 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey Bob, even though I'm not officially on this board, I just wanted to stop by and give you a (((((BIG HUG))))) and let you know you are in my thoughts. I miss you over on the UC board, but I know you will be so much better off with the surgery and will feel a lot better when you are on the road to recovery. Be well my friend.

Carol

Remicade - will have my 27th infusion on March 19 Vitamin B-12/Biotin, Probiotics
 
Co-Moderator for the UC Forum
 
 


Chasblah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 788
   Posted 2/6/2009 1:45 PM (GMT -6)   
I don't think your fears are irrational. Sounds like you've been through a lot! Don't feel bad about being scared. If you were excited about having a very bad dz or dz's) and that you couldn't wait to have your insides chopped up, then we'd be worried.

NE WHO,
I hope everything turns out like you want it to.
Chassity
28 yrs. old. married with one beautiful daughter (born 11/20/07)
-diagnosed with severe pancolitis u/c 2002 had total colectomy 12/19/08; emergency surgery due to abscess-had to redo ileostomy and switch to left side 12/25/08; 1/29/08 found blood clot in superior mesenteric vein (prob. from inf. and surgery inflammation)
pred. taper, zofran, immodium, lovonox, coumadin, carafate, prenatal vit., and pain meds
(ileostomy temporary....not so sure?)

"Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out."

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