I've had a some thoughts this week...but just haven't really taken the time to post.
1) I'm not sure how I feel about the Activia commercials. I actually think it's a little bit of jealousy that people have 'irregularity' issues regarding the lack of going...I wish that would have been remotely my problem. I think to myself...'she has her colon...and she feels super good by eating that nummy treat...I had to take a couple dozen pills and infusions to attempt a feel-good state...she sucks.'
I also find myself just observing women my age every so often out in public and think to myself...'she has her colon I bet...I'm sure she's not thought about what life would be like without...she sucks.'
See the pattern? So, I've concluded that I have...
Granted, I really do not feel the jealousy regarding the ability to poo again...but I think I'm just a little resentful right now b/c I've suffered a great deal, and now that I'm feeling better it's kind of like...'What? No consulation prize?'
2) I'm feel very disappointed with the Adapt lubricating deotorizing stuff. I was really hoping it would be great to have while out of the house for the day, work and night class. However, today I learned it doesn't necessarily clean my accessory better, nor does is deotorize as well as the M9. Such a let down. I rinse my accessory with a water bottle each time I empty it at home...so when it public or at work or school I really do not want to take the time to put water in the bottle and go about my normal routine. I was so hoping the lubricating stuff would be great. Is there another brand that works well? I LOVE the M9...I just wish is were lubricating or something.
3) I'm finally feeling more like me. I'm going to wait about a week or two before working out at the Y a few times a week, and this week I'll start with my little home workouts. My stoma has shrunk more, and it doesn't hurt anymore. I'm able to be more active with my son and I'm almost doing everything I was before the surgery and more! It's AWESOME!!! I totally broke the lifting rules, but with a week and a half on bedrest and really light activity I was almost as good as new! I just get really exhausted easy...but oh well...I have no pain...and I get to do things I had figured I'd never be able to to again!!! I love being UC Free!!!
4) I about peed my pants today and I LOVED IT!!! I'm sure you can understand that with super angry UC or CD the urge to pee was far and few between b/c we were in the bathroom all the time for our disease issues. My bladder never really had the opportunity to fill up! So, today I drank an entire super huge cup of tea (from Subway) with my lunch, and continued to sip on another one on our trip to KC. Half way there I had to use the powder room super bad, but my son was sleeping and if we slowed down (we were on the interstate) or opened a door he would wake up and be a little cranky b/c his nap wouldn't have been all in. SO...I decide to wait until we're closer to our destination. I almost make it, but requested my husband take me to the nearest facility be it a fast food establishment or a gas station...the closest available had to have been the oldest Taco Bell in Kansas...seriously...the looks, decoration and smell took me back to the late 80's and early 90's...Taco Bell has always been my favorite fast food (next to Taco Johns...yum!).
Anyway, aside from my rambling, I loved the idea that I had to pee as bad as I did and there were no bm issues!!! WOW!!!
5) It's been five weeks today since my surgery! Whoo-Hoo!!!
6) I am a control freak and really like routine and schedule. Now that I'm getting my game back we are slowly starting a routine for our son and ourselves! I LOVE IT!!!
7) I forget I have my ostomy all the time. I only remember that it's there if I happen to hear the plastic of the bag or feel the pressure on my tummy b/c i'ts getting full. It's been so long since I've felt normal and stress-free regarding medical conditions. I'm just so happy...so appreciative...and just so much more like 'me'...it's AWESOME!!!
: ) Robin
28 year old Mommy of an amazing 1 year old and Wife for 2 years!
Dx-May 2007 Moderate/Severe Pancolitis - failed all medications
Proctocolectomy w/ permanent ileostomy on 02/06/09!!!
"Your mind is like a parachute, it only works when it is open." -Unknown