heres a few stories

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summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 5/28/2009 10:40 PM (GMT -6)   
So, my little boy is potty training, and he goes outside, and comes back in naked.  And says, go see what i did!!! So i go outside and he has pooped on the porch, BUT he has covered it up with the lid to his water table and then stood on it to smash it down! 
Oh the joys of "regular poop"
I gotta tell you that stuff looks much nastier than what comes out of us!
 
next story
Around here, farmers spread cow or chicken manure around on fields to help them grow, its cheap fertlizer and works really well.  But you can imagine the smell of 100's of acres of land covered in poo, not good.  now add in the heat and rain and it smells like death warmed over 10 times and killed again.
Now having all this poop around means you have lots of flies around.  And the flies are so bad in this area that people have swarms of them.  now my house is cluttered, i mean i have a 3 year old, and two other little boys here the majority of the time too,but i am NOT nasty, no food laying around or anythign like that.
But with all those little boys the door gets left open stuff like that.
We had a cook out last night and there were flies everywhere outside and inside.  My ceiling in my house was covered in them.  The side of my house, where they were cooking was black from flies.  The grocery store a few miles from here had actual swarms, so its not just me, lol.
Anyway, to get rid of them, i first get a fly strip and hang it in the laundry room then put some syrup out to attract the flies, this doesnt work, and the strip hangs right in front of the back door and people keep walking into it!
So, we then decided to vaccuum them down from the ceiling!  So here we are with the vaccuum trying to catch flies, that doesnt work eitehr, lol.
So now we hang the strips in the living room, yes disgusting and OH SO REDNECK!!!  and then, this is the best part, we get the brooms and start swiging at the flies so they will go to the strips!  It was disgusting but hilarous at the same time.
 
And now the final straw, and this is also gross, but so funny and i just dont have anyone else to share this with.
I go to empty my bag and the way i empty it is to put the tail in the toilet and then squeeze the stuff out, well i guess i didnt have it pointed down enough, and when i squeezed poop went flying straight up into the air!  Comes down on my shorts the floor the toilet seat!  Luckily, it was thick and there wasnt a lot in there!  But oh my god EWWWWW!!!
 
now all that has happened sine yesterday afternoon!

ohcountrybear
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 192
   Posted 5/29/2009 3:54 PM (GMT -6)   
That was funny Summer...awful but funny. Needed a laugh.

peggy113
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1998
   Posted 5/29/2009 8:09 PM (GMT -6)   
Only YOU!!! Maybe there are really similar stories out there, but only YOU are brave enough to share them!!! TOOOO funny, thanks for sharing and the much needed laugh tonight!
Peggy
      
Diagnosed with CD in 1979, many resections and meds
Perm Ileostomy July 1984 at Cleveland Clinic
Disease free since surgery 
 


Chasblah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 788
   Posted 5/29/2009 8:25 PM (GMT -6)   
Ah man.
The poop spout thing happened to me last weekend. It was not funny for me, b/c we were out to lunch with friends and MY output was runny. I threw my undies away and went com-man-do, with toilet paper lining the insides of my shorts.
After I told my husband what was up, he asked if I cleaned the mess on the floor up, OF Course I did! I would not subject anyone to that.
I will try to bring extra clothes with me.
Chassity
28 yrs. old. married with one beautiful daughter (born 11/20/07)
-diagnosed with severe pancolitis u/c 2002 had total colectomy 12/19/08; emergency surgery due to abscess-had to redo ileostomy and switch to left side 12/25/08; 2/15/09 found blood clot in superior mesenteric vein (prob. from inf. and surgery inflammation)
coumadin, prenatal vit.
(temporary ileostomy....maybe)

"Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out."


Chasblah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 788
   Posted 5/29/2009 8:27 PM (GMT -6)   
OH i have to add:

My daughter is having a hard time understanding why Mommy's butt is on her belly and we tell her that her butt is in the back. So when we ask where her butt is, she points to her belly button!

That's kind of cute. Poor girl!
Chassity
28 yrs. old. married with one beautiful daughter (born 11/20/07)
-diagnosed with severe pancolitis u/c 2002 had total colectomy 12/19/08; emergency surgery due to abscess-had to redo ileostomy and switch to left side 12/25/08; 2/15/09 found blood clot in superior mesenteric vein (prob. from inf. and surgery inflammation)
coumadin, prenatal vit.
(temporary ileostomy....maybe)

"Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out."


Fruitcake
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 112
   Posted 5/29/2009 10:13 PM (GMT -6)   
I just got back from La Paz Mexico. I had a funny thing happen in the ladies room at
the airport. I always rinse my bag with a water bottle so I was filling it up at the sink
and the bath room attendent came in and saw what I was doing. she started yelling at
me in spanish but I didn't know what she was saying so I ignored her so she pushed me away from the sink. So I just moved back in and kept filling up the bottle. She just kept
yelling at me and when I turned to go into the stall she grabed my water bottle and ran
out the door so I chased her and she went up to a police officer and started telling him
stuff and pointing at me. I didn't know what I had done wrong so I ask the policeman.
He said the woman thought I was going to drink that water and she just wanted me to
stop because everyone knows you can't drink the water from the faucet in a mexican
bathroom! the cop threw my bottle in the trash and told me not to do that again. I didn't
tell him what I was really going to do with that water I figured he would never believe
it1

Chasblah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 788
   Posted 5/29/2009 10:16 PM (GMT -6)   
Oh my gosh!
At least she cared enough about you to do that, even if she didn't really know what she was doing.
Chassity
28 yrs. old. married with one beautiful daughter (born 11/20/07)
-diagnosed with severe pancolitis u/c 2002 had total colectomy 12/19/08; emergency surgery due to abscess-had to redo ileostomy and switch to left side 12/25/08; 2/15/09 found blood clot in superior mesenteric vein (prob. from inf. and surgery inflammation)
coumadin, prenatal vit.
(temporary ileostomy....maybe)

"Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out."


summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 5/30/2009 10:17 AM (GMT -6)   
that was nice of the attendant. Although a bit strange to bring the police into it! i suspect if you want to get horrible stomach problems from the water thats your own business! LOL surely it shouldnt be a crime!

I think i am far too willing to share, lol.

Fruitcake
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 112
   Posted 5/30/2009 10:47 PM (GMT -6)   
I think i need to learn to speak spanish. I think she got the cop because he could speak
some english. when we landed in La Paz they made everyone fill out a health form. All
the workers in the airport were wearing surgical mask because of the swine flu thing
and they ask on the health form if you have a fever or cough or anything. Some guy in
line started coughing and the police took him out of line and into a private room. I don't
know what they did with the guy. I was thinking after dealing with CD for a number of
years and the side effects I think I would rather have had swine flu. Hey Summer I loved
your story about the flies. We have that same problem sailing near seal colonies on the
calif. coast. If the wind dies the flies cover everything so we have water guns that we fill
with wiskey and stuff and shoot them. My son uses cheese cloth nets and bedhead hair
gel. that seems to work pretty well.

summerstorm
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 6571
   Posted 5/31/2009 7:55 AM (GMT -6)   
Whiskey? thats an awesome idea!
Esp if we are having a party and drinking, we can so no, that alchol smell isn't coming off us, its from the air!
I had heard that listerine will work but we didnt try that, we just put some citrenolla (sp?) candles out and that made NO differnece, lol.
I did get some bait poison stuff for the flies, but was hesistant to put it down, i have an outside cat, and of course Michael and the other little boys.  And I did have a rabbit, but i found the rabbit dead, so now i dont have a rabbit, but lots of flies around the rabbit cage, obviously because there was food for him in there, so i put the bait poision stuff UNDER the rabbit cage, where the cat and the kids couldnt get to it, and then under the porch where noone ever goes, and (cross your fingers) it seems to have helped a little.

Post Edited (summerstorm) : 5/31/2009 7:58:49 AM (GMT-6)

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