Hi i can understand your distress and unset. I am relatviely short (5" 3) and not long in body. When i had my first stoma i knew nothing about site placement etc. however i had a fantastic young and empathetic fashionable (whehter that makes any difference i dont know!) stoma nurse who dealt with everyone in that hospital.
however after a failed reversal i had another (unbeknown to me my one was away on holiday) stoma nurse site me and i actualy questionned where she put it but she said oh its okay you can offset the hole (little did she know that is not quite easy when you are on convex and also its nice to get the hold cut for you, also the wafter now covers half of my belly button whereas at the start it covered more - i think the sweling goes down and everyting flattens more.)
Also due to my own fault, i asked for it to be slightly higher - about an inch (as my new jeans actually cut into my old stoma wound) - i did not even think about the consequences of that, but she shuold have! also it is now on my left side. so i struggled for a few months and got really depressed and coudl not accept it, as i too found it digging into me when i bent down. try new products - some are rubbish. I have found coloplast mostly the best size flange and discreet.
Dont worry you can have it moved.
i however can probably not as i have been opened up three times now hence why i had to have my stoma on my left. i have gotten used to it now and actually the stoma is only around 1/2 inch higher - as i say i think things move and settle. So i have double trouble really.