When and how to take away the car keys

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

kgbkind
New Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 5/13/2009 5:45 PM (GMT -6)   
When and how to take away the car keys

Overall, many older adults are capable of driving safely, even into their seventies and eighties. But people age differently. Several factors place seniors at much greater risk for road accidents. More important, a person 70 or older who is involved in a car accident is more likely to be seriously hurt, more likely to require hospitalization and much more likely to die than a young person involved in the same crash. Knowing the risk factors and warning signs of an older loved one who has become unable to safely operate a vehicle will help you gauge when it’s time to take away the keys. There are also strategies to help you talk to seniors sensitively about giving up driving and present them with practical transportation alternatives.

Changes that come with age can adversely affect driving ability. These include:

* Visual decline—including poor depth perception, narrowed peripheral vision, poor judgment of speed and poor night vision, along with increased sensitivity to bright sunlight, headlights and glare.
* Hearing loss—especially the ability to hear important warning sounds while driving.
* Limited mobility and decreased flexibility—which increases response time slows pedal selection and steering control, and limits the ability to turn one’s head to look for hazards.
* Chronic conditions—such as rheumatoid arthritis, Parkinson’s disease, sleep apnea, heart disease or diabetes can impair driving skills, even suddenly.
* Medications—as older people often take more medications, which, in combination or taken with alcohol, can result in risky unpredictable and dangerous side-effects
* and drug interactions.
* Drowsiness—is often due to medication side-effects or sleep difficulties that come with age, resulting in daytime tiredness and an increased tendency to doze off during the day (or while driving).
* Dementia or brain impairment—makes driving more dangerous and more frustrating. It can also cause delayed reactions and confusion on the road.

When it’s time to hang up the keys:
Talking to a relative about his or her need to stop driving is one of the most difficult discussions you may ever face. However, it’s better if it comes in the form of advice from you or someone he or she knows rather than by an order from a judge or the DMV. One of the main reasons seniors are reluctant to give up driving is that it is one of the few ways they can continue to feel self-sufficient. The discussion becomes even more difficult when the person still maintains most of his or her faculties, just not those that enable safe driving.

How to approach “The Talk:"
It helps to have a thoughtful, caring plan in place before saying anything, says Harriet Vines,
author of “Age Smart: How to Age Well, Stay Fit and Be Happy.” She suggests:

* Be empathetic. “Imagine how you would feel if you were in your parent’s place,” Vines says. Ask others to join in the meeting. It helps to involve other family members in the discussion—to help, but not to confront.
* Keep the conversation non-accusatory, honest and between “adults,” not “child and parent.” Say things like, “We’re concerned,” “We care” or “We don’t want you to get hurt or to hurt others.” Once you’ve both come to an agreement, you can continue to support your loved one in ways beyond just offering rides.
* Encourage the senior to use positive language to describe their situation to others and help them gain comfort in asking for assistance.
* Help the senior make a schedule. He or she can plan activities and combine trips on oneday when a caregiver can drive them.

Martha's Vineyard
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 1119
   Posted 7/1/2009 8:14 AM (GMT -6)   
The thing that worried me the most about losing my keys...it was not the car. But my independence. How was I going to buy food. How was I going to get things done?
I think that these are the things that need to be addressed. In a positive note. Alternative transportaion. Teaching them another way to get around. Or living in a place that makes that easier. To be able to still have a life of sorts and not be stuck at home.
2004 in Martha's Vineyard me and my two daughters then 11 mos and 6 all got Lyme Disease. This was only known to us because we found the tiny ticks on us and we got very ill. My dog also got lyme and he went lame.
We have fought it for 4 years to no avail.
We all got it again this summer is Texas.
I am now in treatment in Scottsdale Arizona at Envita.

"The eyes cannot see for for what the mind does not know."


Martha's Vineyard
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 1119
   Posted 7/1/2009 8:18 AM (GMT -6)   
You take the keys away from a loved one who cannot drive.
If there is a chance that they could hurt themselfs or worse yet....another person in the street. It is your moral obigation to take the keys away. But first I would start with the alternative ways to get about.
And if you want to keep yourself from being the focus of alot of misery over being the one to take the keys away.
Lie....do something under the hood of the car so that it will not start at all.
So it will not be your fault. Then stall for some time. Have the car taken to a mechanic etc. Taken away. And then day by day....stall. Say how much it is going to cost...etc...no parts...etc...
Till you can figure out what to do.
2004 in Martha's Vineyard me and my two daughters then 11 mos and 6 all got Lyme Disease. This was only known to us because we found the tiny ticks on us and we got very ill. My dog also got lyme and he went lame.
We have fought it for 4 years to no avail.
We all got it again this summer is Texas.
I am now in treatment in Scottsdale Arizona at Envita.

"The eyes cannot see for for what the mind does not know."


akhiker
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 7/12/2009 10:22 AM (GMT -6)   
I would just add that while it's good to have a few family members present to discuss taking the keys; it shouldn't be a group confronting an individual. It's embarassing to the individual to have a group present when they're told they no longer function like the competent adult we all want to be.

I'd also present the alternatives at the same time...like how frequent the bus comes, the friends they can meet if they go on the group outings w/ your local senior center, etc. Biking and health reasons can even be an option to mention depending on their situation. There are some very sturdy trikes for adults that are becoming more and more popular.

Hope it helps.
New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Monday, September 26, 2016 7:12 PM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 2,694,397 posts in 297,465 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 152141 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, jagnight.
398 Guest(s), 13 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
guygpooh, notsosicklygirl, AzerilA, Katerina-b, jagnight, rocckyd, supapfunk, Redwing57, NiceCupOfTea, exqualls, Going for brachy, evianangel, iPoop


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer