EMPATHY................APATHY..............Huge Difference!!!!!!!!!

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Howlyncat
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   Posted 3/6/2005 10:02 AM (GMT -7)   
      EMPATHY......The ability to put yourself in the other persons shoes,the willingness to try and understand just what they go thru on a day to day basis.an honest attempt at giving that person your support and love and understanding...............APATHY.........Not being willing to put yourself in anyones shoes other than your own:caring only about one person YOU.Not truly understanding what we are telling you about how we feel but "saying " that you do ..............................I was at the mercy of this type of person(nurse) this wknd and it sure made me see the light and also see what our world has come too especailly in the health care field.As he was asking me questions.......he wasnt waiting for my answer before asking another/asked me how long I had this "boo boo"......first off the so called boo boo is crater like and basically eating my finger away,but ok its a boo boo.I would never have treated a patient as I was treated by this so called professional.Obviously he missed the class of Empathy 101 while at school.As for the peeps in the waiting room I got some looks and side steps(want to yell at the top of voice its not contagious:but let them sweat)..... LOL ........My family all say they understand how I feel and yet they dont have a Clue........They keep piling more on my plate and adding to the stress,which in turn makes the crohns worse as we all know and the PG as well.They dont get it at all that the ones who ultimately pay for me being down is Cait and Howie (self).They dont have to live with me and see what I go thru.I find my HW  Family does care and they DO have EMPATHY......and for all of you I am so very thankful that I have you all.I keep you in my heart and in my prayers as I am able to EMPATHIZE with you totally and honestly.Take Care And God BLess........Lyn  


    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn

Post Edited (LKE aka Lyn Kyle Emerick) : 3/8/2005 7:13:57 PM (GMT-7)


SnowyLynne
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Date Joined Apr 2004
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   Posted 3/6/2005 1:41 PM (GMT -7)   
We,who have AD haev Apathy,we don't want to do anything,period!There are meds.for this,as it shows depression.I'm on Remeron,still could care less about doing much.
SnowyLynne


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/6/2005 3:33 PM (GMT -7)   
SL............You are on this board showing that you care for people...........you were in the nursing field for all those years, over 30 right so you may be apathetic now because of this AD:But at one time you must have been emphathetic to be the type of caring nurse you were.You still have some of those caring qualities as even with the AD you are looking after Larry.I hope you have a good night and are better rested than you were the other day....as you had said you were overtired and didnt know when to rest..thats my biggest problem as well................I am truly sorry about the chat mixup and I take full responsibility..............I hope we can set it up for Monday at 6pm if you are interested.i am posting this at 5:30 where I am so we can figure the time diff if there is one...........Take Care and God Bless you and Larry
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


SnowyLynne
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   Posted 3/6/2005 5:16 PM (GMT -7)   
I was,at one time.I do my helping over the internet,but I'm up front & to the point about things.Don't have time nor care about doing "oh,baby I feel so sorry"type things.I can say them,I just don't feel it.Yes,AD has done a number on me,can't help it.
I have no interest in cleaning house,doing dishes,laundry,stuff like that.
Alot of what I loved to do is gone.........
SnowyLynne


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/7/2005 11:38 AM (GMT -7)   
.....SnowyLynne............I am truly sorry that this AD has taken so much from you.May God Bless and Keep You Safe
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


SnowyLynne
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Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 1539
   Posted 3/7/2005 2:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Right now my main thing is getting Larry to & from therapy,& eating lunch out.lol.We'll be going 3 times a week for the next month.I can still do anything I want,I just son't want to.Make sense?
SnowyLynne


AlwaysRosie
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 3/7/2005 10:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello Lyn and Snowy . . .

Lyn: How did things work out with your soar ? If you went to the ER it must have been pretty bad. I didn't realize that Crohns caused such problems. I guess I should learn more about that, as Crohns is becoming more common. Let us know how things are.

Snowy: You do have your hands full!! The Jigsaw Puzzles are still Dad's favorite. He really likes to spread that glue on there and then when they dry we hang them on the wall. He has a real art gallary going. But he loves to show his finished puzzles to all who come to visit.

Lyn: Sorry, I have had computer problems and was at Dad's today (Mondays). . . I'm sorry I didn't even see the post about chat time until now. Lyn . . . you must be Eastern time because the time you typed in your message and the time of the post matched for me and I am Eastern time. If Snowy is in Texas . . . that might be Central time . . . but I have a hard time making a commitment for chat. I am home all day and when hubby gets home in the evening, I like to care for his needs. I am often on the computer around 8 or 9 or 10 in the eves. . . but 6:00 I am preparing or serving dinner.

Don't plan around me. I will catch you when I can.

Blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie
Psalms: 139

UCTD, Hashimoto's, SAD, Diverticulosis, Glucose Intolerance


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/8/2005 7:24 AM (GMT -7)   
AR..wondered where you had got to .I thought I had scared you off lol............No one is at fault but me over the chat times I said at the beginning I was only human so I learn thru trial and error right lol.How are you doing and how is your dad ?Been thinking about you.Yes crohns does do a lot to your body and with the pyoderma it just adds to it.My one finger is so bad right now looks as though its ready to come off.The pain is unbearable at times but hey i will get thru it .You let me know about your availability for chat and Peter has put me in the right direction for the calendar so i will yak to SL and go from there ok ........Take care and GOD BLESS
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


AlwaysRosie
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Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 3/8/2005 5:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Lyn,

How do you you treat that finger? What did they do for you at ER? ((((((Lyn)))))))))

My computer is on the fritz so I use hubby's when I can. Thanks for asking. Dad has developed a real closeness to me. He goes to my picture and asks mom why I am not there. When I arrive, he hugs me and says "I thought you were never coming back" sad I went 3x last week but he doesn't remember. So I just get over there when I can enjoy him in our puzzle making.

Blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie
Psalms: 139

UCTD, Hashimoto's, SAD, Diverticulosis, Glucose Intolerance


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/10/2005 9:10 AM (GMT -7)   
Ar am still on IV antibiotics but they dont seem to be doing the trick this time ..am in severe pain always i kinda think i would rather have no finger than one like this .........my daughter is just terrified as she doesnt see me get this bad usually..........Having hard time with mom as no one else looks after her and I cant just leave her on her own all the time ...cait and hubby trying to help out as much as possible.Thanks for your concern ..............take care of yourself and May God Bless
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


AlwaysRosie
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Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 3/15/2005 8:36 AM (GMT -7)   
Oh Lyn,

You are having a time of it!!! I am sure that your flare is made worse and longer by your exhausting schedule with all that you are doing. Would you husband consider getting on the phone with your sibblings to schedule some help at your mom's. Even if they could help with things that are not her personal care . . . like house cleaning, laundry, bringing in some meals and grocery shopping, maintenance on the home etc. You won't be any good to her in the hospital. No need to answer this post . . . just a thought.

You and your family are in my prayers.

Blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie
Psalms: 139

UCTD, Hashimoto's, SAD, Diverticulosis, Glucose Intolerance


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/15/2005 12:28 PM (GMT -7)   
AR....my siblings thoughts are to put her in a home thats all no talking it over just that one sided idea......they do not remember that she brought them into this world loved them .supported their every decision in life(good or bad) and still tries to be MOM..........I am not that way and never could be ......I have talked with HOwie over moving into their big house and having her f/t to give dad a break....both Cait and Howie are great with her and I know that Dad is getting tired and scared.Just recently found out that when she was at the docs(i didnt go for once) that he rx her ativan and I know now why she was flipping out and acting very strange....took the pills and info to the doc and told him NEVER to give her meds without my consent /knowledge as she has reactions to a lot of them.I am listed as her legal guardian and the doc was made quite aware of this so I am sure it will not happen again................................On a lighter note am glad you and your Dad are doing and spending so much quality time together it is very important for him as well as you .....I think about you always and have you and your family in my prayers...........God Bless and Keep You Healthy
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


AlwaysRosie
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Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 3/18/2005 10:19 PM (GMT -7)   
Sorry your siblings have closed a very special door. Hmmmmm, I guess we all have to make our own decisions. I have 8 brothers and sisters. One sister and I make sure we are there at least once a week. The others are either very busy or don't realize how much mom would appreciate a break or a visit. I have talked to them . . .but they probably think they have many tomorrows left. You are a GREAT daughter. . . and your hubby and daughter are to be commended for their compassion for your and your mom.

Dad and I tried an "activity pad". The ones that have follow the dots and color by number, etc. He really enjoyed it and wouldn't skip a page. He colors VERY carefully and very thouroghyly. He even redid some of my work. He whispers when we are puzzling or coloring. Very sweet. I'm not sure why, but it is special.

Thanks for the prayers !!! I will pray for you and your family as well!!

Blessings!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie
Psalms: 139

UCTD, Hashimoto's, SAD, Diverticulosis, Glucose Intolerance


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/19/2005 9:42 AM (GMT -7)   
AR......I honestly dont know what to tell you about the whispering ,my mom does it with cait and I ..........its like its supposed to be our lil secret thing that we are doing .....i dont know but I do know it makes for a great time with her.Maybe she thinks she is getting one over on dad LOL.My siblings are nothing like yours hun ,they live right here in town and dont bother with her or my dad.My hubby will shoot dad 40.00 to go to the casino and then cait and I spend the day doing as much as Mom feels up to ,sometimes I just watch her sleep peacefully.Siblings need to understand that we are not there for what we can gain when she goes but for what we are gaining while she is still here to show us things and she is still able to teach us a few things as well.They are losing out and for that I feel bad but I wont push them to love their mom........that comes naturally........Take Care ....GOD BLESS
    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/6/2006 1:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Now it is put dad in a home lol
They cannot get that out of their head put them in homes no worries
Not in my time
Lyn
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 One thing I know for sure is we have each other and in times of need no one could be better off IMO
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity...with that ...My God
 Family and Great Friends ........I have it All
 
        Lyn
 


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/7/2006 2:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Dad did his disapperaing act at Market on me thought it was a hoot
Wind me up and watch me go lol
Hoping all are well
Lyn
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 One thing I know for sure is we have each other and in times of need no one could be better off IMO
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity...with that ...My God
 Family and Great Friends ........I have it All
 
        Lyn
 


Suzy2
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Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 12/10/2006 11:04 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lyn. So sorry that you are having such a rough time. I see this thread was started a while ago. Did your finger heal ok in the end?And was it due to your Crohns?

My Sister doesnt whisper. In fact she has a habit of saying some things out loud,especialy when we are around other people. She was in the fish and chip shop with her husband the other day. Now,my Sister has developed a habit(not her fault obviously,its due to her illness)she constantly refers to "cats" everything she sees is either "a cat" or "a cat one" Anyway, while in the chip shop she pointed to some sausages and said rather loudly "Cat one,look cat ones!" The guy behind the counter couldnt help but laugh. My sisters Husband said somthing like "oh its ok take no notice she isnt well" and the guy behind the counter replied, "Oh I see,but it was funny though" He said it in a kindly way,he wasnt making fun.

You have to laugh about things sometimes dont you? otherwise we all know what the other option is:-(



Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/10/2006 3:56 PM (GMT -7)   
I know that feeling lol
Dad doesnt always whisper and he has not lost his sarcasm at at times .......Yes I do laugh alot and not at him as you know but with him it is rewarding but sometimes it is hard

Yes my Pyoderma is directly related to crohns ..........It has gotten alot better I do have to watch stress and trauma to body or I break out
Thanks for your support and care
Take care and always be well
Luvs
Lyn
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 One thing I know for sure is we have each other and in times of need no one could be better off IMO
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity...with that ...My God
 Family and Great Friends ........I have it All
 
        Lyn
 


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/10/2007 1:54 AM (GMT -7)   
So great to see our sweet Rosie here
Definitely a lady with Empathy 
Lyn

yeah


    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity...with that ...My God
 Family and Great Friends ........I have it All
 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......You can Do It........We are Here For You 
                God Bless .........Lyn
Make The Best of The New year .......You Can and Will Reach your Goals
                              Loads of Love n Support
                                        Lyn   
 
 Co Mod for Crohns
Moderator Anxiety/Panic
Moderator for Alzheimers  
 
                                  
                          
                                  


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 2/22/2007 3:02 PM (GMT -7)   
    When You Truly Feel Someone Else's Pain
                           
                              You are Humbled
 
A wise man /friend and mentor said these words to me and I will never forget tongue
Lyn  
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity... 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......
 
 
          ** When You FEEL Anothers Pain You FEEL Humbled ** 
 
   
                             
 Co Mod @ Crohns                                     
 Moderator@ Alzheimer's 
 Moderator @ Anxiety/Panic
 
                                     LYN
                                  
                          
                                  


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/8/2007 7:15 PM (GMT -7)   
I have had a real eye opener on this with my dad in hospital and seeing other older folk with AD having NO visitors nor company at all ......Nurse Just dont find the time nor have they got enough here at the Critical Care Unit IMO......
I talk to all the ones I can it is sad n heartwrenching but I feel I need and want to Pay It Forward.......

God Bless All
LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity... 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......
 
 
          ** When You FEEL Anothers Pain You FEEL Humbled ** 
 
   
                             
 Co Mod @ Crohns                                     
 Moderator@ Alzheimer's 
 Moderator @ Anxiety/Panic
 
                                     LYN
                                  
                          
                                  


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/5/2007 4:19 PM (GMT -7)   
EMPATHY......Makes for a very FULL heart and beautiful heart

Happy Easter all ......

Blessings
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 **When you Feel Anothers Pain ....You Are Humbled**
 
 
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Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/9/2007 12:40 PM (GMT -7)   
Teach your children Empathy
I promise you will never reget it and this world just might start changing
Never know do we til we try to help change it

LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
Co Mod ..Crohns Forum
Co Mod A/P Forum
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Dx with Crohns ,pyoderma gangrenosum ,Anxiety and panic
 Way to many meds to put down ..........
 
Take that Lil step ..I will hold your hand and we will make big strides
 
                             
 
   LYN                               
                          
                                  


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 6/25/2007 2:49 AM (GMT -7)   
  MY sister needs to find out what the difference is between the two
 
nono
EMPATHY she has NONE
 
APATHY she has plenty yeah
 
 
 
There is a big difference and I wish she knew the difference
 
Just my opinion
 
 
 
 
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
Co Mod ..Crohns Forum
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DX with Crohns, Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety /Panic
 
Take my Hand ...I will WALK with you
 
When the GOING gets TOUGH..The TOUGH get GOING 
 
 God Bless All
 
LYN    
                                  


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 9/22/2007 7:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Caitlyn makes me so PROUD has started working in the Strathroy hospital is already attached to an 80 yr old woman and just tickles her to no end that she is " following" all the family members in Nursing activity for now anyways

She has sooooo MUCH Emapthy it can be hard as well ya know BUT I will never chastise her for caring and having love for all human kind no matter the race religion or age ........


Contribute Today ..Click On         
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Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 1/15/2008 8:28:26 AM (GMT-7)

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