Is some improvement possable?

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Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 6/5/2005 5:21 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello everyone, I wonder if you can help me figure somthing out.
 
My sister is now 55 and she was diagnosed when she was 50 with what the Doctors called "early dementia" I have asked if it is Alzeimers that she has ,and the Doctor said that it was a "Alzeimers type" of Dementia. I still feel a bit confused about that to be honest,but anyway,to the main reason for my post.
 
My sister lives with her Husband and Daughter. Six months ago my sister didnt seem to be able to think enough for herself to get up and get her self so much as a drink of water. Now suddenly over the last few weeks she has started making a cup of tea in the mornings for her self and her Daughter. She has also started to do some washing up and she had stopped doing that as well at one time. Can this possably mean that my sisters problems could be due to somthing other than Alzeimers?
 
I personaly believe that a lot of my sisters problems have been made worse by her husband. He drinks alot. I am sorry to say but he is horrid. My sister blocked the toilet because she used kitchen paper instead of toilet tissue and instead of reasuring her and telling her not to worry instead he shouted at her and made her feel stupid. This has led to my sister now putting dirty toilet tissue in the bin(wherever she is)instead of her flushing it down the toilet. interesting I think that according to my sisters daughter,Husband is still in bed and not watching over her while she makes the morning cup of tea. My self and my other 2 sisters spend what time we can with her and make sure that she gets good meals and take her for days out etc,but there is only so much we can do when we have our own lives and problems to deal with.
 
I have spoken with sociel workers about my sisters husband but they just say "well we cant kick him out of his own house" I just feel that without her husband my sister could be 50% better than she is. Do you think it is possable that her problems are more due to being trodden into the ground for so many years by her husband rather than it being Alzheimers that she has?
 
Sorry to go on, but any thoughts on this would be apreciated.
 
Sue
 
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 6/6/2005 3:32 AM (GMT -7)   
Sue ...........this sure sounds like it has that possibility BUT I would have the doc do some more tests and then you would know if it is from abuse or actually alzheimers ............was her hubby ever physically abusive to her causing her to hit her head alot ?I ther living in that environment is not good for her at all but what are you suppossed to do .......does her daughter live with her ? Snowy will prob be better at advice for you on this one but I would think she needs more tests and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers ............God Bless ..........Lyn
 
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    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 6/7/2005 2:38 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank Lyn.
 
Yes my niece does still live at home with her Mom,although she is in her mid twenties and Engaged so she isn't going to be there too much longer. She is the one that makes sure my sister has her tablets at night and takes her shopping etc on the days that the rest of us can't help out.
 
Too be honest my sisters husband will only go as far as the local shop to get his paper and booze so if the rest of us don't make sure that Stella(my sister)gets to her Doctors apointments etc,well I just don't know what would happen. But her Husband is the one that is claiming the care alowence. It is wrong,it should be going to my niece not him. He always seems to put on a show whenever a social worker goes around to see them and I am sure that they don't believe that he is as bad as we have told them he is.
 
I will do what you suggested Lyn and ask if Stella can have more tests. I will let you know what happens.
 
Thanks again
 
Sue


Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 6/7/2005 2:43 AM (GMT -7)   
It's me again sorry.
 
I forgot to mention somthing else and then I couldnt find the edit thingy lol.
 
You asked if my sisters husband ever hit her. Well my niece says that he doesnt but I am realy not sure what to think because since my nephew has left home he is saying that his dad used to hit him when he was only young. I wouldn't be surprised at all to find out that he has hit my sister,but without proof it is like you said,what can I do?
 
Sue


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 6/7/2005 4:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Sue ....it is a fact as far as I know that the hits on the head will or may contribute to this..........I am so sorry she or any woman or man for that matter has to live like this it really is so sad isnt it ...........glad you will look into it for her ......and in my opinion if he hits one whats one more right ....I pray thats not the case ....yes please keep me posted and you take care as wel ....God Bless ......Lyn
 
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    I cannot keep your feet from stumbling..........I can only offer my hand that you might grasp it and not fall...........Lyn


SnowyLynne
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 1539
   Posted 6/7/2005 6:38 AM (GMT -7)   
Do the social workers know he doesn't take her to Dr.appoitments,& talk to the Dr?The Dr.can back this up.
SnowyLynne


Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 6/7/2005 8:44 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello SnowyLynne

Yes they do know because it is always myself and my neice that take her for Doctors apointments and we have also had apointments with sociel workers at their office and my sisters husband never comes. He always says he isnt well. He did go for one apointment though to do with sorting out care alowence(surprise surprise) Also my neice has been up to the office of the sociel workers in tears more than once on her own because the situation at home was becoming too hard for her to cope with.

I personaly think that because the social workers know that there are some family that are trying their best,that to a certain extent they have the attitude of "oh the family will make sure she doesn't die" I am sorry I do know that these people do a lot of good but I am finding the whole situation very frustrating.


SnowyLynne
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 1539
   Posted 6/8/2005 6:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Did Neurologist Diagnose her?
SnowyLynne


Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 6/10/2005 3:55 AM (GMT -7)   
I feel awful not knowing the answer to your question SnowyLynne,but Stella saw a Lady that I believe to be a Consultant and she was the one that sent Stella for the brain scan etc.and then I presumed that the results were then sent back to the consultant. I have to say that I do not know if a Neurologist Diagnosed Stella or not. I will definately question the Doctor about this at our next visit and I will also find out for sure what the "consultant" actuely specialises in. I know all about which Doctor to see etc and what questions to ask when there is anything to do with the digestive system because of my own health problems in the past,but when it comes to a Dementia type illness I am at a loss. I am learning though thanks to you and this board.

I am going away for a week now because my family have organised a surprise holiday for me(one of my other sisters will make sure that Stella is ok while I am away) I will get back to you and let you know what happens at the next Doctors apointment.

Thankyou both and take care

Sue

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