my father-in-law died @68.

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sportsfanatic girl
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 47
   Posted 12/8/2005 11:04 AM (GMT -6)   
i am not new as i post on the irritable bowel syndrome. my father-in-law just died tuesday. he started with the symptoms of alzheimer's @ age 55. he had slowly progressed to the point where he could do nothing for himself but lay in bed. it is such a heart-breaking disease. he developed pneumonia and that's what he died of. a majority of dementia patients usually die from complications of pneumonia. we know he is in a better place since he had absolutely no quality of life. it's not fair. i am a social worker in a nursing home so i am around it all the time. it is just so sad. it's very hard when they don't know who you are anymore. the best way to approach them and talk to them is to be at their level and where they are. my father-in-law used to call me "bill" and would always ask what i was doing or where i had been. i would always go along with him and talk to him like i was "bill". it's very heartwrenching but when you go to their level, you will get more of a response from them. if anyone needs to talk, let me know. lisa

Suzy2
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2003
Total Posts : 335
   Posted 12/8/2005 11:47 AM (GMT -6)   
I am sorry to hear about your father in law Lisa. I like the way you say that you spoke with with him. he thought that you were Bill,so you were Bill. I think that is good advice,I am going to try and respond in a similer way with my sister. Thankyou.

Sue


Ellie 1
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 1291
   Posted 12/8/2005 3:27 PM (GMT -6)   
(((((Lisa))))) So sorry for your loss.
God Bless to you and yours
Ellie

mrs mac
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 163
   Posted 12/8/2005 10:47 PM (GMT -6)   
sorry for your loss

you are in my thoughts and prayers!!!


take care

sandra xxxx

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/9/2005 7:49 AM (GMT -6)   
Lisa .......Yes I am in total agreement to let them think what they want and let them think you are who they want to a point ............you are in my thoughts and prayers ........This is a horrid DD that our loved ones live with and it affects all around them ...........I am looking after both parents ( step dad) and Mom......she fell yesterday and is now in a cast from shoulder down to elbow and her wrist is bandaged as well.......what a day for us both ...........thanks for your input ....God Bless .......Lyn
 
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dbab
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Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 4151
   Posted 12/9/2005 1:38 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lisa,
I was browsing through the recent threads when I saw your name here. I just wanted to add my condolenses to you and your family. You are in my thoughts.
Hugs, Des
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AlwaysRosie
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 12/10/2005 12:54 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Sportsfanatic,

So sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your technigue on how to manage some of the communication problems. I have the same experience with my dad. He introduces me as his mother (I'm his daughter), but I don't correct him either. We can still enjoy spending time together and I do appreciate every happy moment there is.

Lyn . . . OH NO! You just didn't need that and neither did your mother. I hope things go better for you this week.

Blessings!!
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