Padraig........ My Story ........My Wife..... Your Story?????

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Howlyncat
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   Posted 5/28/2006 11:32 AM (GMT -6)   
  Hi there Padraig I put this thread up for you to share your stories with the rest of the forum and for them to share theirs as well .I am hoping this will be a helpful thread with advice ,support and loads of caring and love for each other........Take care and God Bless...Give G Jean a gentle Hugg for me .
Snowy ,Rosie ,Bag Lady ,Nance and (hope I have not missed anyone ) any new members you are more than welcome to share your stories here....We can support each other and perhaps learn new things to help combat this DD
 Take care all and God Bless......Lyn

Post Edited By Moderator (Admin) : 7/11/2006 10:59:45 AM (GMT-6)


CharleyRice1931
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   Posted 5/29/2006 9:36 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lyn, Thanks for your help. There's no way I would tell or advise anyone to take on caring for a loved one without help and support. My purpose is simply to show why I came to undertake caring for my wife without help. The system as I saw it failed both my wife and I. There was and still is a lack in understanding of the deep bond of love that exists between us. I consider us as one and expected to be treated as such. When I was becoming a pain in the neck to the staff at the nursing home looking out for the intrest of Jean. The matron left me speechless with the remark: "You realy do take 'till death do us part serious' ". A meeting was convened attended by my daughter and I to discuss my removing Jean. I expressed my wish to take back control of our lives. Leaving the meeting my daughter: "Dad they are pleased to be rid of both you and Mom". "Why do you say that?" "They expected you to complain about the place, with spending long hours there you saw too much". I didn't care, I was getting her home soon. I recall saying, and repeating many times: There is no one or any thing out there, I can do this alone. Didn't I spend the first 16yrs of life alone. The first night home togeather I was apprehensive and not a little scared. The next morn all my worries melted away to see her smile, I knew I had done the right thing. More than three years later still caring alone I couldn't be happier. This girl has inspired me with her love to achive things I never thought I was capable of. I spite of her lack of speech or movement she still inspires me.
How I wish I could give some of my determation to the less fortunate.
May your God go with you.

Howlyncat
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   Posted 5/29/2006 10:29 PM (GMT -6)   
Padraig ....your stories do inspire people that is why I started this thread and with the hopes others will post their story as well .......Your love and determination shows thru all of your posts ...you are a wonderful man and I know G Jean is better off with you than anywhere else .......and you are all the stronger for having her with you .........Thanks for your post.....Give G Jean a gentle hugg for me.......God Bless.....Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 5/31/2006 6:48 AM (GMT -6)   
Sylvia this is a great thread for the story you posted .........God Bless....Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/1/2006 5:51 PM (GMT -6)   
Ali (luvdogs) this is a good place to put a story about your lady friend as well ..we all have stories ...My mom just passed away a couple of months ago and I am going to post but am not in that "zone " yet ........be well .....God Bless..Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/2/2006 12:51 PM (GMT -6)   
Hope all are doing well ........God Bless..lyn
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luvdogs
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   Posted 6/3/2006 12:32 AM (GMT -6)   

Wow, I'm incredibly awed and encouraged by all of you.  Thank you so much for welcoming me into your forum.  I feel blessed to read your stories and to share my own story about my special friend in the nursing home.

I have been reading through all of your posts over the last several days, and I am deeply touched in my heart by each and every one of you. 

Lyn...I didn't realize that you recently lost your Mom.  I'm so sorry.  Your love for her clearly continues to shine.  She must have been a remarkable woman to have had such a wonderful daughter.  Thank you for all you have done to support others dealing with Alzheimer's.

Padraig...Your story brought tears to my eyes.  I have not yet married, but when I do, I pray that I can find a husband as devoted and loving as you.  You truly inspire me.  Alzheimer's may be robbing your wife's memory, but it is not robbing your love for her.  Thank you for sharing your story.  I will keep both you and Jean in my thoughts and prayers.

Lyn..You asked me to share more about my dear friend.  Thank you so much for providing me with this opportunity.  This gracious lady has changed my life in many ways, and I often wonder if we were destined to meet one another.  I have been her friend, but she has also been my friend - a very special one too.  Even though she is 55 years older than me, I feel a connection with her that cannot be accurately described with words. 

I first met Carolyn shortly before Christmas of this past year.  My two Cavalier King Charles Spaniels had just been certified as Therapy Dogs, and our first official visit was to one of the nursing homes in my area.  Little did I know that I would soon form a close friendship with one of the residents of that home.  When my dogs and I first entered Carolyn's room, I could definitely tell that I was in the presence of a die-hard dog lover.  On her walls, paintings of all of her dogs in her life proudly hung.  In addition, many framed pictures of her dogs were carefully placed around her room.  Her bed was full of dog stuffed animals.  So, as you can imagine, when she saw my two smiling spaniels rush over to her side, she started clapping her hands in excitement.  "Put them in my lap," she kept repeating.  After I carefully placed one of my dogs in her lap, she hugged him and smothered him in kisses.  We stayed about thirty minutes that day, and as we were leaving, she asked if I would return with my dogs for another visit.  I promised that I would.  And that promise I have held, and will continue to hold, until the very end.

After that first visit, I began returning at least once a week to see Carolyn.  After placing my dogs in her lap, or in her bed with her, we would share stories.  I began to learn more about her and her past during our many conversations.  She had been totally independent until about three years ago, when she had a stroke that left her unable to care for herself.  Shortly before that time, she had lost her sister, who was her best friend.  There was no other family to care for her, so she had to placed in a nursing home.  Because no beds were available in the city in which she lived, they had to place her in a home three hours away, in the city in which I live.  That meant that she had to leave her friends and neighbors, which upset her greatly.  What particularly devastated her, however, was that she had to find another home for her beloved dog.  When I asked if the person that took the dog ever sent her pictures or updates, she replied with tears in her eyes, "No, I asked them not to.  It would hurt too much."  Of course, that broke my heart.

I began to notice that her memory problems were increasing as the months passed.  She would often become incredibly frustrated with herself when she couldn't remember something.  Also, I noticed that any excitement or unusual change in routine only worsened her memory problems.  What most disturbed me, however, was that she was seeming more lonely and sad.  When my dogs and I arrived at her room, she was always sitting in her chair with a sad and distant stare.  Once she saw that my dogs and I had come to visit, however, her face would light up.  Clearly, she needed my dogs, and somehow, my dogs sensed that as well.  We began to visit her more often, and we spent longer times with her.  

Now, my friend has good days and bad days.  Usually, when we first arrive for a visit, she has the most memory problems.  Interestingly, after she has been holding my dogs for about fifteen minutes, she does much better.  For her entire life, dogs have been incredibly important in keeping her happy and healthy, and I think that now the same holds true.  Sometimes, when we leave, she shuts down. 

I know that life in a nursing home has been incredibly hard for her.  She once told me that all she wants is for a dog to sleep in her bed again.  I wish that I could do more for her.  For now, I'm just trying my best to educate myself on Alzheimer's, and of course, we visit her often.  Every time she forgets something, though, my heart sinks.  She really feels like a grandmother now.  No matter what, my dogs and I will continue to visit her, even if she ever gets to the point that she no longer recognizes us.

I apologize for my long post.  When I write, I just type and type away.  Thank you again for all of your support.  It's time to put my therapy dogs in the bed.  Now, I'm grateful for just the simple things like that. 

Take good care,

Ali



"The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear."  Maya Angelou

Post Edited (luvdogs) : 6/3/2006 12:26:58 AM (GMT-6)


CharleyRice1931
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 6/4/2006 3:35 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lyn and greetings to all, All the tasks that should be done I fail to complete in a day in spite of setting my alarm back to 0510 hrs. I must do my morning run and as the weather is better I push Jean around my 3 and a half mile route. Friday I took her on our twice weekly shopping when she became upset at seeing and hearing a small child loudly howling in the hope of being carried. I smiled as I watched the Mom talk softly to the child. "Jean he's testing his Mom, but she's not giving in". I enquired of the Mom "Is he going to win?" Smiling she replied "No". It's too easy to become upset at the vunerable who's ability to communicate is limited. When Jean appears upset I just smile and put her good hand on my nose and tell her to yank it. Some times she looks sad. Is she asking, "Am I a burden?" It's at times like these I tell her "Ah God love ya, are'nt you a dote". I think if she could talk I would hear the the oft repeated phrase "Your strange". Last night as I was giving her the drink after the meal, I was tired and wanted her to hurry up. Taking a good look at the picture of her mouth and chin covered in chocolate and her making a noise as she blew bubbles in her bottle. How could I get upset? Ali we are closer to dogs in make-up than we might think. I always quote the analogy of myself as an abondoned abused stray when first released from state custody at 16. Having seen the violent death of a playmate in the institution and not being touched by it, except to say "He's better off" shows how emotionaly barren I was. It was not until I met Jean did she touch my very soul. Like a stray she won over she'll never get rid of me.
May your God go with you
Padraig
 
 

Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 6/4/2006 4:38 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks to you both for sharing your stories ......it does help doesnt it Ali and Padraig has so much to offer all of us .......Yes I lost Mom in March and it is still very hard for me .....my step dad has AD as well so I am still looking after him........there is not a day that goes by that I do not feel blessed for being given this opportunity ...........never........Take care all and God Bless......How could you not help but smile Padraig? Give G Jean a gentle hug for me
Ali, you are Carolyn's Guardain Angel........Your story is wonderful and inspiring ....Thank you ..........God Bless...Lyn
 
  Ali do not apologise for the posts being long it is okay and you had a great story to tell......God Bless....Lyn


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Post Edited (Lyn (Howlyncat)) : 6/5/2006 12:50:55 PM (GMT-6)


Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/5/2006 1:46 PM (GMT -6)   
Hoping all are doing well and having a great time with loved ones anf friends.......whether they have AD or not I am a firm believer they know we are there for them .....and love them unconditionally........God Bless...........Lyn
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CharleyRice1931
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Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 6/5/2006 3:20 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi Lyn and friends, Sylvia your poem touched me deep. Like Lyn you are blessed to have such Moms. Reading it seeing how you both have the deep love reminded me as a child fantasising about having a Mom. But I grew up as I started work at ten daydreaming finished. At 16yrs I was due for Disposal (not my words, but those recorded on official docs.) I was introduced to my birth mother. This stranger asked me my name, on telling her, she looked at the Christian Brother, "Are you sure you have the correct boy?" Thinking did I get it wrong? for if I did I'm in for a hiding. My luck was in when the Brother asked, "What's your number boy?" That's something I'll always get right, 11536. "That's your son". Weeks later I was given over to her, she didn't have a place for me to stay. This year I have discovered someone lied and still the jigsaw is incomplete. I never got to know the woman as I ran away free for the first time in my life in a strange wonderful world. But like any stray I kept my distance and observed, and still do. Something within me refused to let go the belief there were caring Mothers. Thank you for re-enforcing the belief. From Jean I discovered the power of love, is it any wonder I rejoice in returning that love to this special person who I believe was sent to me. This small glimps of my background shows how my perspective differs from most people's. I have completed my story to the time of our marriage, it had been hard work. It has been suggested I do the second story of our life. Of course the longest chapter would be on my caring. I've had a wonderful life and would be pleased to share it with others. I'm not interested in making anything, just hope it might help others. I have recently been told I'm dyslexic! how funny is that?

May your God go with you   

Padraig

Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/5/2006 8:32 PM (GMT -6)   
Padraig ....I am so sorry for you and the pain you had to have felt not having your Mom and being known as a number.........God gave you G jean and she has given you the abilty to love and be loved .....You are so good for this forum and I am glad we have you with us .......Sylvia's poem touched us all .........Please give G Jean a big yet gentle hug from me .........God Bless........Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/7/2006 4:20 AM (GMT -6)   
I will be in bed most of day today have bronchitis and not feeling to good ..time to quit smoking ........Take care all and God Bless..Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/10/2006 6:23 AM (GMT -6)   
Padraig ..........How are you I am starting to worry about you and G Jean ....have not heard anything from you .....Is everything okay??......God Bless....Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/17/2006 8:43 AM (GMT -6)   
Hoping you post and let me know how you are doing ......God Bless..Lyn.........Here's to a Great Father's Day for you Padraig..........Miss You........God Bless..Lyn


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Post Edited (Lyn (Howlyncat)) : 6/18/2006 8:17:22 AM (GMT-6)


CharleyRice1931
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 6/20/2006 10:16 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lyn, It has been hell without a landline. It ment I had no phone nor access to the internet for almost a week. It proved very stressful as I hate asking people to let me use their phone. I pray it's OK from now on. Jean is keeping well, except that she is sleeping much of the day. Like every aspect of Alzheimer's the different signs come and go, until they stay. Her limbs are much stiffer some days more than others. Like a child she holds on to my clothing or hands when I wash or dress her, also holds on to the towel when drying her. The first year home she had tremors her hands would tremble it was explained away as part of the illness. I never noticed it vanish over time, could it be withdrawl symptions when I removed all the medication she was receiving at the nursing home? My present concern is her hiccups, can it be some thing I am feeding her? what's the cure? I am off to the hospital tomorrow to have an operation on my gum, it should be interesting when I turn up with Jean. It was carers' week last week and I paid a visit to a show bus they had in the town centre. I found it strange no one wanted to learn about Jean, I was told I was very lucky to be able to look after her without any help and I was a "one off" one in a millon. Questions I asked, they were unable to help with, I just get on with it, telling myself 'so what's new' Must dash and bath Jean before evening meal. How are you and your Dad? try to get as much full fillment as I do caring for Jean
May your God go with you
 
Padraig

Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/21/2006 6:31 AM (GMT -6)   
I am so happy to see you .....I figured something was wrong or you would have been on here........I would think for sure it would be withdrawal from meds .why do they constantly over medicate ......You see most times in homes they (the patient ) is in bed not active not getting any kind of interaction at all ..just medicate....I dont think half or more is needed........I really think peeps are to afriaid of this DD to want to learn about it and that saddens me as we have lots to teach from a caregivers stand and as a person with DD...just know you are making a contribution here thats a blessing itself .........I hope all goes well for you and sounds painful I will always find my Dad funny and fulfilling yep even sometimes agravating lol but Oh how I love him ,he is not doing to bad considering ..lots of yard sales and such ...on to this kick with Casinos.......had to say no to that.....he has always been a bettting man on the horses and I will still do that occaionally with him but I am not a Casino person.........Take care and keep posting ..Lots of love to you and G Jean............God Bless......Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/25/2006 10:59 AM (GMT -6)   
Hoping all went well with you at the dentists ..How is G Jean doing ...Gentle huggs to her from me .......God Bless.Lyn
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/26/2006 4:05 PM (GMT -6)   
Still having problems with your internet or are you not well after the dentist visit .....Post and let me know how things are when you are able ...God Bless.Lyn
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CharleyRice1931
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Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 6/27/2006 3:08 AM (GMT -6)   

Hi Lyn, Yes I have been having trouble with connecting to the intenet. Had our son over all yesterday says he fixed it, addmitted he made errors before. I expected treatment at dentist, it turned out to be a checkup to find what I required done. The hospital staff and dentist seemed surprised at my taking Jean everywhere with me and asked about help I received:"I look after my wife 24/7 and don't want any help thank you" The dentist said I looked remarkably fit and thought that was why the infection was being contained. They said Jean looked real well. I managed to convince them to give me an early date for the operation to remove a bit of infected root from my gum 6th July. I have to convince myself I can cope no matter what after the operation. Hope you and your Dad are keeping fine, enjoy the moment. At last I am getting on with my early life's story and expect to finish it soon. It will help me to put it behind me. Jean sleeps much longer now, it gives me time to write. Best wishes to you all.

May your God go with you. Padraig


Howlyncat
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   Posted 6/27/2006 4:00 AM (GMT -6)   
These darn things can be a pain but they are great for being able to reach acrosss the world to talk and meet friends like you ....I bet they were surprised it is not often you see aman or woman for that matter who looks after therir wife/husband the way you do ...I am honored to know you .......I am so looking forward to reading your "Life Story"........G Jean will sleeep more and more luv as the days go by but she is at peace and knows she has you her greatest love in her corner always ........God Bless and Keep You and G Jean Safe .........Lyn
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CharleyRice1931
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Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 6/27/2006 10:05 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lyn and fellow carers, I had completed a message and pressed post that meant the end of it. So here goes again. I note your post is at 0400hrs don't you sleep? You must take care of yourself for the sake of your Dad and your own wellbeing. You must be reading my mind as I was considering asking if you would mind reviewing a chapter of the story at a time. I have finished it, but am still crafting it am starting the 3rd chapter. As Jean sleeps a lot, it gives me time to get on with it. I will be pleased to get the early years over and done with and maybe gain peace of mind. Two things I can't understand from reading the entries from experts and fellow carers. How come Jean knows me still, most say their loved ones don't know them. It is said it is impossible for one person to care for a loved one alone, I have been doing it for years. The sadest statement too oft repeated is "I can't bear to visit him/her it's too painful, I want to remember him/her the way they were". Could it be a case of nature and no nurture when it comes to my perspective on life. After all nuns could not get emotionally involved with the children in their care. The blessing is when affection is shown its value is overwhelming. Please take care of your self and savour the moment.
May your God go with you. Padraig.

Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 6/28/2006 3:53 AM (GMT -6)   
Hello there ....I would be honored to read the story a chapter at a time for sure and thanks for asking ........yes I sleep but not to well ....I am breaking out in those sores again I will send you the pics of them they are gross but I have to live with them and I do preety good ,they are so painful it is unbelievable .......Mom knew me as well and my Dad she got cait and I mixed up at times but still knew who I was if I was there w/o cait........She also knew that my Dad loked after her til I got there to take over ......She knows you dont doubt that at all ......Peeps that say that "they cannot go as it hurts them or they want to remember the way the were" are just scared or making excuses IMO........I do believe you are the epitomy of Nature not Nuture ......you really had no one til G Jean and I feel she is the best thing ever to happen to you .....and you for her.......Take care and I will rest I promise ....I have to go to Cait's school today .......got a call from the Principal and she is getting the " Highest Acheivement" award today .she is truly my gift as is G jean yours .......Lots of love and gentle huggs to both .God Bless.Lyn
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CharleyRice1931
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Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 397
   Posted 7/1/2006 7:36 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lyn, Still having problems with connecting to web. AOL beleive they sent faulty equipment and will replace it by Mon 3rd. Also arrange to have our phone line checked. Sorry to hear your sores are playing up again, is there no quick fix? It is illnesses like yours and others which go to re-enforce my appreciation of my own wellbeing. I have just returned from a three mile walk with Jean. She keeps leaning to one side and her head falls back, I'll have to get working on that. I have just been looking through Jeans closed  medical diary from the day of her arrival home, 46pages. Drawings of the preasure sores, gradings and sizes. Notes on medication like morphine etc plus installing a catheter. It is hard to believe she was so ill and I believe it was due to lack of proper care. I can't blame anyone, the needs of both the carer and patient are not properly understood. Sadly no one appers interested in learning from the experts- the carers. Thus the reason for joining this forum.       May your God go with you.              Padraig.

Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 7/1/2006 2:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Padraig.... ..you are so right about peps not wanting not willing to learn sometimes:most times.... ......My sores are really bad right now so I have been resting quite abit have an IV in now so hopefully it starts to heal them soon,,,,I have seen so many pressure sores on peple in homes and in their own homes it is unbelievable : all it takes is a few minutes to keep making sure person is changed positions and that will be some benefit.. .....Why was G Jean on Morphine ? For the bed sores ? Seems like quite a heavy med for that??...... .....WE all are learning from you on this forum so keep on posting I hope your internet gets straightened out soon..... ....I LOVE the first chapter of your draft it is beautiful writing and I am pretty positive you are not dyslexic...... ....Give G Jen a hugg for me .... .Love and God Bless. .Lyn

Post Edited By Moderator (Admin) : 7/11/2006 10:58:38 AM (GMT-6)

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