Mother hit by car this morning!

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Ellie 1
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   Posted 8/3/2006 9:58 AM (GMT -7)   
I think this is just the final straw.  In addition to not looking where she's going, her decision making abilities are at an all time low.  I dodn't think I've ever been so frustrated.
She was hit by a stolen vehicle (officer witnessed the incident), thrown up on the hood of the car, slid off the side and hit the ground.  The car (actually I think it was a truck) never stopped.  Just kept right on going.  The officer on the scene said it appeared to be intentional.
He called the paramedics out.  They check her out, find no immediate serious injuries and proceed to get ready to transport her to have her checked out at the hospital (she's 79 for heavens sake) and she balks.  Refuses to be transported.  Now she has medicaid.  She pays nothing for med. bills.  This was not a financial issue.  She just didn't want to go.  Couldn't leave the da*n cat that long.
I'm not just worried, I'm ticked off.  I asked her if the roles had been reversed and it had been me in the accident what her reaction would have been.
What if she's bleeding internally?  I told her she could be and that she might not wake up in the morning if she doesn't get it checked out.  Told her I'd come take her right now, she still refused.  At the very least she's going to hurt so bad she won't be able to get out of bed tomorrow.
I'm at a loss here.  She tells me this stuff so I'll worry and then wont let me do anything to fix it.
AAAAAAAArrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhh!
Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement.
 
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mrs mac
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   Posted 8/3/2006 12:42 PM (GMT -7)   
oh ellie poor you!!!

i'm at a loss of what to say you, you must be so worried, frustrated, angry, upset, and probably have many more emotions running through your head just now!!!

i hope your mum does hurt in the morning and maybe then you can persuade her to seek some medical attention!!! keep on at her!!!

let us know how she is!!!


sandra xxxx and some extra hugs to you (((((((((((ellie)))))))))))))))

Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/3/2006 3:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Ellie ......OMG I am so sorry I have not been here today just saw this now .....I will get on MSN with you after a bit okay when I am done at the Church.......Dam* I feel so bad for not being here for you .......LOve sis
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/4/2006 2:17 AM (GMT -7)   
Ellie ....I hope your Mom is okay and you too ........I will be on later I am going out this am with Cait ........need some Mother / daughter time ......Love ya sis and so sorry all of this happened
I wonder again if like here in Canada social worker will be knocking at her door over this
Here they would come and ascess......
If so it maight just be what needs to happen eh sis
I hope you A/P is keping under control as much as possible with all this added to it ...
BTW got your Email hun thanks ad now I know what you go under lol
we can chat later............
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Ellie 1
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   Posted 8/4/2006 5:07 AM (GMT -7)   
She called me back last night. I guess she'd called the ambulance back and had them come out. Changed her mind because her wrist was swelling. They told her that since she had refused the first time, her insurance would not pay for this trip because now it was just a swollen wrist. She'd be billed 300+. So of course once again she refuses to go, (bet they bill her for the trip out anyway) and calls me. I was in the middle of my T appt and didn't even look at the phone til I left. By the time I got her on the phone, (her line was busy for almost 90 min.) I had to leave to get my daughter to her cheer dress rehearsal. I told her I could drop the girl off and have her get a ride home and come out and take her, but no, she says she'll wait till tomorrow. I tried to call her when I got home but it was nine and she never hears the phone when she's sleeping. Sure hope thats all. I haven't tried yet this morning. It's just now seven here and I'm sure that even though she talks about how she gets up early, if I call I"ll wake her. She's going to be terribly sore this morning. With any luck my aunt took her in last night. She only lives two blocks away. She still drives all over the place. Not sure why she can't do something for mom.
Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement.
 
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mrs mac
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   Posted 8/4/2006 1:28 PM (GMT -7)   
hi ellie how are things honey????

Ellie 1
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   Posted 8/4/2006 2:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Mrs. Mac
Well, she called me at 8:30 this am and said she needed to go, but once I got my schedule all juggled and everything arranged, she changed her mind again. She told me the swelling had gone down some and it was feeling better. I don't know what's going on. I think I'm going to go out tomorrow afternoon and see for myself just the same. I'm not going to be okay with this until I do. It may very well be just a sprain, and I'm fairly certain internal bleeding would have made itself evident by now, but I need to look at the arm and make sure it really isn't a big deal. If it looks broken I may have to toss the stubborn woman over my shoulder and carry her to the van caveman style, lol. She's all of 4' 10" and I may not be a whole lot taller, but I've got a couple of inches on her, and I could do it.
Thanks for asking
Ellie
Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement.
 
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mrs mac
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   Posted 8/4/2006 2:12 PM (GMT -7)   
lol good luck ellie, hope she's ok, let us know how things go


sandra xxxxxx

Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 8/4/2006 3:16 PM (GMT -7)   
SIS ......There very well could be internal bleeding .......I am almost positive your Mom has Demetia.......I am really surprised with the attendants attitude that came last night ....300.00 for an ambulance trip that is outrageous it cost us 28.00 here for that same thing .........
AS for your other family members ya right, they sound just like mine do and were while Mom was alive and now with Dad unless they want something from him or wanted her to do something or give them money..they didnt help out at all ..........only Cait and I did and do .......
I feel they know you will .............just as mine do ....
I was so hoping that because of this an assessment would have been done .....maybe when and if you can get her to doc's or hospital I would really push for one ....write down things she is doing her mood swings her anger,frustration ...everything you can possibly think of
I am so sorry you have to deal with this ...I truly understand and know what you are feeling right now and have been for some time .........
I had to talk to cait about some issues today so we went out for the day sorry I havent been here for you ......I want you to know that I do care hun honestly and I am WORRIED sick about you .......I will call you if you want to email me your number so we can talk ..I will not repeat to any one you have my word.........God Bless sis and Luvs ya


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Post Edited (Lyn (Howlyncat)) : 8/4/2006 5:24:02 PM (GMT-6)


Ellie 1
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   Posted 8/4/2006 4:01 PM (GMT -7)   
You're such a sweetheart Lyn, I'll e-mail you later. I have a houseful of teens waiting for me to drop them at the theatre to see some silly cartoon cow movie? Barnyard? Go figure.
Mom insists she's okay. I'll see tomorrow. My aunt made her call me as soon as it happened. Of course, she didn't want to be responsible for mom in any way. Oh, you have no idea how mad that makes me. But when someone else offered to drive her this morning, so I wouldn't have to come out with all the kids, she said she didn't like him,(her nephew) and wouldn't go. I'm going to call her back in a little bit, and if she isn't considerably improved I'm going out anyway, and make her go. If it comes down to calling the police and telling them she's incompetent. I won't just let her sit there and die. She can hate me all she wants. She does anyway.
E-mail you later.
Ellie
Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement.
 
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/4/2006 4:26 PM (GMT -7)   
It may have to come to that and I dont think she hates you .........I really dont ............Please email me for sure I will check in later.....talk about Soul sista's lol..........I am forever doing something with th teens here too lol.........Good Luck sis
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/4/2006 4:31 PM (GMT -7)   
I am so Hoping that SnowyLynne will post as she has a lot of knowledge about this kind of stuff ........
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mrs mac
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Total Posts : 163
   Posted 8/4/2006 4:38 PM (GMT -7)   
hwy ellie, i do hope that it all works out ok for you and your mum!!
 
i wish i could offer you more advice, but seeing as i am in the uk, am not sure about how you guys go about things over there!!!
 
good luck and my thoughts are with you all just now
 
sandra xxx

Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/4/2006 5:06 PM (GMT -7)   
You are a sweetie Sandra......
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Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/9/2006 4:56 AM (GMT -7)   
BUmp....Hey sis how is your MOm any news of what can be done for her and YOU........
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Ellie 1
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   Posted 8/9/2006 9:00 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm told that as long as she is paying her own bills and caring for herself physically, that there is nothing I can do. I guess she has to do something like burning the house down before I can force her to go to the dr. and get checked out in this state.
She's run up thousands on her credit cards taking care of stray cats. (She takes them to the vets and has them neutered and gets their shots) A noble endeavor, if you aren't half starving yourself to do it. She lives on her Social Security. Almost nothing. And I can't help her financially.
She's taken her cat to three different vet's in the last week. She imagines health issues, takes it to the vets, sometimes they give her the meds for the animal, but by the next day she won't use it, and off she goes to yet a different vet.
I told her yesterday, that I would not help her kill her cat by taking it to the vet every other day. I will take my mother to the dr., the store, or anywhere else she needs to go, but not to the da*n vet.
I"m trying so hard to be patient. But she won't let me help her. And the system won't help her. I am frustrated beyond belief. Don't sound like much of a daughter do I? I call her every day to check on her but I dread picking up that phone. The negativity on the other end of the line is endless. Okay enough of my vent.
Ellie
Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement.
 
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Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 8/9/2006 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
Yes you are being the proper daughter ....putting your foot down.........she will come to this realization soon ..........I am totally in disbelief with socil services there we hadv "Adult Protective Services " here ......worse than Childe'sn aid ..........Dont get to down on your slf she knows she is pushing your buttons hun
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Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 8/10/2006 10:33 AM (GMT -7)   
BUMP
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greyhound
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   Posted 8/10/2006 1:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Sending prayers. God bless.
Adopt a retired racing greyhound


Howlyncat
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   Posted 8/10/2006 4:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Sis how is she doing .......and you of course.....
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 Let That Strong Spirit Be Your Guide
 
 Never Give up on Yourself ,Your True friends nor your Dignity

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