My brother died in his sleep Monday!

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paniccu
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Date Joined Apr 2005
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   Posted 1/16/2008 2:47 AM (GMT -7)   
 I haven't been on this forum in awhile. I realized that if I wasn't anxious it could actually make me anxious so I don't go on a lot, but I really need you all right now. I am losing it. My sister came into town Saturday, 1st time in 2 years. My brother and his wife came over and  his children's families came over for dinner. Everyone had a great time. Monday morning I get a call from my SIL that my brother is dead. Never woke up in the morning. He was only 54. I am literally loosing my mind and my poop. I already hadn't slept Monday and yesterday I was up all night with diahrea so bad I'm wondering if I could have the stomach flu. Still have it, how could there be anything left in me? I think it's just because I feel like my insides have been ripped out. I am so distraught. My chest is constantly tight. You know yada yada, the usual, but I can't get control over it. I'm thinking of calling the doc for Xanax to get me through the wake and funeral. I don't know what to do about the diahrea though. I tried Pepto Bismol and nothing worked. Sorry for rambling. Any thoughts, advice would be appreciated. Deep breathing usually works for me, but it's not this time.  I am so afraid I will be constantly anxious again after this because it's taking so much out of me. Oh, and now I'm more afraid of dying of course. I guess that would be the best way to go though.

Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/16/2008 6:00 AM (GMT -7)   
I am so sorry about your Brother hun and I do know how it feels to lose someone you love

I would go ahead and call the doc to get something to help you threw this
Immodium might help you beter with the D....I am sure it is or might be a physical reaction from the mental and physical pain you are going thru

I think everyone is afraid of their own mortality so you are not a stranger there and I know that ppl here will help you thru this and support you as much as you will let them

Please let us know how you make out with the doc and the Funeral ..

MY thoughts and Prayers are with you in your loss
God Bless
LYN
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Moderator,Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers,Co Mod for Crohns                     
 


paniccu
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   Posted 1/16/2008 6:35 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you Lyn.

Junebug05
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   Posted 1/16/2008 9:22 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm so very sorry about your brother.  I agree with Lyn, call the doctor and get some xanax to help you get through this awful time.  Maybe ask for something for the diarrhea as well.  I hope that you will be able to get through this okay.  And again, I'm so sorry about your loss.

stkitt
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   Posted 1/16/2008 9:45 AM (GMT -7)   
 
Expressing heartfelt sympathy for the loss of your brother. I understand your pain, my sister died on Thanksgiving Day.
I agree with Lyn on the Immodium and yes please do call your physician and ask for something to help you with the anxiety through the wake and funeral.
 
Try not to be tough and brave, let out the tears and grieve for you brother. We are all here for you.  Gentle Hugs, Kitt
 
Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
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crying
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Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 263
   Posted 1/16/2008 12:10 PM (GMT -7)   
I am sorry to hear that. I know you must be a mess right now. I would call the doc let him/her know how you are doing and maybe he/she can give you something to help you thru this time.
Bless you and your family!
Hugs
Puttin' the Fun in Dis-fun-ction!


marthamae
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 285
   Posted 1/16/2008 4:53 PM (GMT -7)   
My sympathies to you. Of course you're gonna feel absolutely terrible! Anyone would! Give yourself and your body a LOT of time to be in bad shape. Things like this take a lot of time to heal. Many hugs.

nervymeg
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Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 1/16/2008 7:01 PM (GMT -7)   

Hey, I am so very sorry to hear about your losssweetie.  It's extra hard when it's sudden.  I'm going through a similar grief process at the moment and I find it hard to breath and sleep and forget food.  I am getting as much rest as I can and taking xanax and ativan to get me through the day and night.  This is not a time to let your doctor tell you to "get through it alone" if you suffer from panic/anxiety.  It just freaking crushing and I have to keep squeezing my face shut to stop crying...again.

My deep sympathies to you again.  It's going to take time and please get all the help you can get.  Sometimes these awful, awful things make us stronger in the long run (I really hope that didn't sound trite). I just hope we can give you some support here.  keep posting and let us know how things go xxx


I alone can do this, but I cannot do it alone. 
 
NervyMeg


paniccu
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Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 1009
   Posted 1/17/2008 5:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you so much everyone for your sympathy and suggestions. I did call my doc yesterday and he gave me a perscription for Ativan and told me to my Immodium. I do feel a little better today. I was able to get some sleep (except for my 4 yr old waking me at 4am) and my stomach feels a little better. It's going to be a long day today. Thanks again,
Liz

stkitt
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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 1/17/2008 10:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Dear Liz, We are here for you.  I am glad you got a med from your physician. I will be thinking of you today. Gentle Hugs to you and all your family are in my prayers.

 
Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


nervymeg
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Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 1/17/2008 6:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Liz, I am so very glad you got some ativan.  It's helping me through a rough time at the moment too...sleep is an absolute gem for the grieving process..I hope you get plenty more and start to feel a little more part of the human race soon.  Try and break the day down into small things instead of looking at how long it si until you can get back into bed.  I'm finding it helpful to keep myself really busy cleaning and working, best of luck and many symapthetic hugs xxxxxxx

I alone can do this, but I cannot do it alone. 
 
NervyMeg


machelle
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 1/17/2008 8:34 PM (GMT -7)   
So sorry about your brother, i can't even imagine loosing mine, but you need take time to make yourself o.k. going through something so hard, again so sorry for loss, my prayers for you and your family.



machelle

lavendar
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 450
   Posted 1/18/2008 1:24 AM (GMT -7)   
 
     I have five brothers and cant began to  imagine lossing any one of them . I hope it doesn't happen in my lifetime. I know the adavin will help you as well as the imodium. I have suffered from an anxiety disorder for many years and adavin has really helped. Unfortunately your loss is new and hearfelt. I will be praying for you. june

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/18/2008 7:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Wondering how you are doing

Wanted to let you know I have been thinking about you and praying for you

Hoping all is as good as it can be under these circumstances

Take care and know we are here

Luvs
LYN
Contribute Today ..Click On         
Moderator,Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers,Co Mod for Crohns                     
 


paniccu
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Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 1009
   Posted 1/19/2008 6:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks all for the sympathy. I'm hanging in there. My sister and her family are at my house still. They are leaving this afternoon. My 4 and 6 yr old sweeties are also helping me. They are full of love and hugs.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 1/19/2008 11:01 AM (GMT -7)   

Children are the reward of life.  ~ Congolese Proverb ~   I am so glad youhave your two wonderful children to give you hugs, warm and gentle hugs.

Kitt



 
Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/20/2008 2:01 PM (GMT -7)   
Hoping you are doing better P
I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers

Luvs
LYN
Contribute Today ..Click On         
Moderator,Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers,Co Mod for Crohns                     
 


mynameis
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 1/21/2008 11:54 AM (GMT -7)   
So sorry about your brother's death. Grief is so hard, it's something you have to just try and ride through by trying to get plenty of sleep and surrounding yourself with people you love. *hugs*
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