please dont think im crazy

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New Member

Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 1/24/2008 3:59 PM (GMT -6)   
My anxiety was getting so much better, I actually thought I found "the secret" to beating it, but then my fiance broke up with me. If thats not enough, he has to stay in my house until he has somewhere to go. Because of this i'm basically experiencing isolation because he wont have anything to do with me and i dont have any friends where I live. Well, i've been controlling my anxiety quite well until today. I was watching TV and I needed to get up for something. When I was walking down the hall, I heard laughter from the TV and a thought came to my mind, "What if they're laughing at me?" I instantly thought, oh my god, that is SO stupid lol. I'm almost positive that it was just one of those thoughts that happens with anxiety, but it made my anxiety flare up so bad because of my fear of going crazy. Has anyone else had this happen?

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 1/24/2008 6:36 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi there and of course we do not think your crazy, no one is crazy here.  I have not had that experience but perhaps someone else will be able to address it.

I think staying in the same apartment is not a good thing.  If he broke up with you he should move out as it seems to be his hometown can he not move in with a friend, rent a hotel room or whatever.  It is so unfair to subject you to his presence and make you feel isolate.  That is mental abuse........... talk to him about leaving. 

Do you have a therapist or someone you can talk to that is just for you?
Keep posting here as we will support you and we care. Hugs to you. 


Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 171
   Posted 1/24/2008 8:00 PM (GMT -6)   
I agree with Kitt, it is NOT a good idea to stay in the same house with your ex until he finds some place else to go. If you allow this, he may take advantage of you and take his sweet time getting out, which is just not a good (not to mention fair) situation for you. I also agree with Kitt that his staying there is a form of mental abuse. He is the one who decided to break up with you, it is your house, and he will have nothing to do with you, therefore it is his obligation to leave right away. He probably thinks that you won't force him to do any such thing, which is why you must be strong and tell him to get out. If he says he has no where to go, don't feel bad -- remember that he left you and put you into a situation that you don't deserve. If he doesn't have a friend he can stay with, give him a list of local hotels. Trust me, if you allow him to stay in your home this way it will only fuel your anxiety.

It is only natural that you're feeling anxious at a time like this, so please don't fear that you're going crazy. No doubt it will be a tough few weeks ahead having to deal with the breakup and its fallout, but you WILL get through it and your anxiety will diminish again. Just make sure you be your own advocate and tell your ex to leave so that you can work through the anxiety that much more quickly.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 263
   Posted 1/24/2008 8:00 PM (GMT -6)   
I too am with Stkitt...He should be out of there. I would try to find a a therapist to talk to. A break up can be hard but with him still there, thats like salt in a wound. I am sorry your going thru this, it can be very hard.

I have never thought the tv was laughing at me but if it was just a quick thought for just a sec, it could be your mind just wondering about. I dont think your crazy at all!!

Best wishes!
Puttin' the Fun in Dis-fun-ction!

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 171
   Posted 1/24/2008 8:07 PM (GMT -6)   
Whoops forgot to address the bit about your thought! I've had similar experiences, but just like you have quickly thought afterward "That was silly/irrational..." As long as you're able to realize that the thought is irrational, you're OK. Don't worry that you are crazy/going're not! But if these thoughts get out of control or you become to think they are REAL it would be wise to speak to a therapist.

New Member

Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 1/25/2008 10:27 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks everyone :) Thankfully, I have never had such a thought and thought it was real. I just always wind up asking myself, "Do I have all of these thoughts for a reason?" but i always know when something is off the wall or irrational.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 1/25/2008 9:34 PM (GMT -6)   
You will never be JUDGED nor thought Crazy here ever.........

We are all here for support and understanding

Please do keep posting and personally IMHO you need to kick him to the curb and the sooner the better for YOUR health ....Just my opinion........Welcome to the "family"

Contribute Today ..Click On         
Moderator,Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers,Co Mod for Crohns                     

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 344
   Posted 1/26/2008 8:46 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey Porcupine,

I feel for you. My ex-finance also broke up with me (six months before the wedding, saying that he didn't want to go down this"path" with me anymore and asked for the ring back). I was devastated. While we didn't live together, I still put everything that reminded me of him into a corner and gave him everything he or any member of his family gave me back to him, except for the stereo system and some CD's I really liked.

For you to heal and look out for yourself, he needs to move out. It's not fair to you, especially since he's the one who broke up with you. He should have thought about the ramifications (i.e. no more housing) before he decided that he wanted to move on. I understand if you're a compassionate and understanding person, but you have to do what's best for you right now, since he's doing what's best for him by free loading off of you. If you're feeling particularly revengeful, I'd even suggest changing the locks and not giving him a key. After all it's your house. He has no right to be there anymore, unless you allow it.

I've also had plenty of irrational thoughts when I'm particularly stressed out, which at the time seem to make sense, but I quickly realize are completely nuts! :)

Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 345
   Posted 1/26/2008 1:58 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm with everyone---not a good scene having the guy that just broke up with you---to live w/ you! To the curb with his rubbish! :)

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