My meltdown and fear of coffee making

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badfish
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Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 3/9/2008 3:30 AM (GMT -7)   
For the person who wanted to kno bout making coffee setting off my anxiety, i cudn't find the thread u started so I posted here. In my last year of uni i got anxiety attack everytime i tried to write my dissertation so instead of wrting it i found things to avoid doing it like house work, making cups of tea, cooking, washing my clothes jus general stuf but i would do them constantly like at 3am anything but be left with freetime. (coz if i had freetime tht meant i had to write my dissertation see) Neways after few wks of tht with no sleep i began to associate making cups of coffee and putting the washing machine on with me avoiding my dissertation hence they gave me big anxiety attacks. Back in those anxiety attacks wud last for hours. It sounds weird but i cudn't put the washing machine on at all had to get housem8 todo it. I cud make cup of coffee but not wivout it leaving me feeling really anxious. Then all the usual stuf evry1 goes thru, i became really detached and depersonalised myself alot. I went atleast a week without saying a word to any1, Im not exaggerating i jus didn't feel like socialising everything set off anxiety. Hope tht explains it. Every1 wil be glad tht i can make coffee fine now and use a washing machine.
  smurf (random smurf)
 
 
Ant


 

Post Edited (badfish) : 3/9/2008 4:23:38 PM (GMT-6)


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/9/2008 9:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Badfish
Thanks for explaining this
I use to constantly clean and my house was /is spotless to begin with BUT I would find things to do JUST to avoid doing something I did not want to do
So I can understand what you are saying.......

I think there are many that do this as well .........
Hopefully they will post there story
Again thanks for posting

Luvs'
LYN

*** Am severely OCD when it comes to clean and germs *** yeah


  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum, Anxiety/ Panic and Other Disorders
         Mod for Alzheimer's, Anxiety and Panic and Co Mod for Crohns
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Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 3/9/2008 11:48:24 AM (GMT-6)


marthamae
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Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 285
   Posted 3/9/2008 9:55 AM (GMT -7)   
I too read your post about making coffee and was wondering about it.

I have heard of a lot of fears and phobias and anxiety issues but never one about making coffee! It actually gave me a chuckle...in the sense that I was laughing sympathetically WITH you, not laughing AT you. It just goes to show you that for those of us with anxiety anything can be a trigger.

When you explained it it made perfect sense! Now I don't have to wonder if I should fear my coffee cup!

Hugs to you :)

badfish
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Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 3/9/2008 4:22 PM (GMT -7)   
No worries marth im constantly look bck and laughin at myself.
 


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/9/2008 5:09 PM (GMT -7)   
I am truly happy you posted this Badfish
Perhaps it will bring out other ppls fears of anything they have ya know ..........

It was great of you to share.........Luvs
LYN
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum, Anxiety/ Panic and Other Disorders
         Mod for Alzheimer's, Anxiety and Panic and Co Mod for Crohns
    www.healingwell.com Donate today to keep HW helping others
 
                     
 


getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40598
   Posted 3/9/2008 5:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Do you think that it made you feel anxious because you felt guilty for using it to do instead of you disertation? That kind of sounds logical to me right now. I often get anxious and feel guilty for enjoying life. Then I get really scared. I am getting better about allowing myself to be happy now.
Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/9/2008 5:24 PM (GMT -7)   
I do the same thing as well Karen ......
I really wonder why we feel guilty for enjoying life when we really do desrve too

be well and have a great night........

luvs
lyn
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum, Anxiety/ Panic and Other Disorders
         Mod for Alzheimer's, Anxiety and Panic and Co Mod for Crohns
    www.healingwell.com Donate today to keep HW helping others
 
                     
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40598
   Posted 3/9/2008 6:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Lyn,

It will just come out of thin air. I will be enjoying myself, doing nothing wrong, and i feel like I have done something really bad. It is wierd. I am getting better with this, it happens a lot less often than it did. It makes me wonder how I could have lived life so long not allowing myself to enjoy things and felt that was normal.

It is nice to know that somebody understands.

Luv and hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


ivy6
Elite Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 3/9/2008 7:40 PM (GMT -7)   
Jay said:
"hence the program i came up with....but i digress..."

Just a warning, Jay. No jabs, please. I thought we'd resolved that issue.

Ivy.
Co-Moderator Crohn's Forum.

Post Edited (ivy6) : 3/9/2008 8:43:10 PM (GMT-6)


ivy6
Elite Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 3/9/2008 8:13 PM (GMT -7)   
Mystruggle, I apologise if you feel that you are being picked on. The fact that we picked up that comment - which more than one mod has perceived as a jab, btw - is indicative of how upset we were by yesterday's incidents, and that we are now being very vigilant to ensure it doesn't happen again.

And yes, there was a lot of information in your last post.

Sincerely,

Ivy.
Co-Moderator Crohn's Forum.


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 3/10/2008 4:24 AM (GMT -7)   
I wudn't say i felt guilty, more i felt helpless and unable to act. Im prettyopen bout my anxiety and i kno wht it stems frm and i kno why i get particualy anxious bout certain things. Hence no amounf talk therapy wil change the reasons for my anxiety. Bringing issues to the light isn't going to change jus make u aware of y your anxious in my talking bout my oast only confirms to me tht shud be anxious bout certain things and i feel getting ppl to realise how their pasts hav affected them may only reconfirm to them y they hav become anxious. Hence the need for CBT to change to change ppl routines and thinking.
 


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 3/10/2008 4:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Karen I too am getting better with all of this with CBT and other self help techniques but I still DO often wonder why I feel bad whn I am happy and feel good ya know
'Yes Mine comes outta no where as well

I dont do anything IMHO to feel bad about .......I JUST want to be happy with no feelings of guilt or remorse

Luvs
LYN
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum, Anxiety/ Panic and Other Disorders
         Mod for Alzheimer's, Anxiety and Panic and Co Mod for Crohns
    www.healingwell.com Donate today to keep HW helping others
 
                     
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40598
   Posted 3/10/2008 10:39 AM (GMT -7)   
Same here Lyn,

I will be just enjoying myself and bam here it comes. But I am learning not to let it stay with me and go back to what I was doing. But at first it was such a feeling of dispair, that it was hard to shake. Then I would end up crying and would be depressed. But I really am getting better at is and realize that I too deserve to be happy. And I do think it is from my childhood. My mother would pull the rug out from under me when least I least expected it.

Luv and hugs,
Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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