"Healing is an energy phenomenon. Hope is another word for Healing. "Cracks in the concrete are just reminders that you fall apart no matter how strong you are""Sometimes it is best to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve""Im going to smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like its all a dream, and pretend its not hurting me."
Post Edited (TeNNiSd0C09) : 4/9/2008 3:28:46 PM (GMT-6)
Co-Moderator Anxiety/Panic Disorders
Weekend Warrior Princess
Wow! I have to say that I too am very proud of you - for a couple of reasons. First, knowing what your true limits are and second, for stepping up and talking to your teacher about this real problem. You were very brave in telling her what you deal with and I'm glad to hear that she could see just how bad this is for you. Your willingness to do an alternative assignment also shows that you just aren't trying to get out of this speech. Are you willing to give the speech in front just her? Maybe the one-on-one will be a little easier for you. Trying to work out an alternative is a good thing to do. I know how hard public speaking as it's also something I just have never been able to do.
You are not a weird person at all. I also think of everyone else's needs before my own. It's only in recent months (and I'm in my 40's) that I have started to think of myself and that's only because of the downward cycle I've been in. Thinking of others first before yourself can be a hinderance to you, because there are times when you really do need to address your own needs first. I can understand that you don't want to let everyone down, but I don't think it's worth going through this much anxiety and panic just to please everyone else. You just aren't ready for this huge step yet - at some point you might get there, but just not now. It's not your fault and please remember that. You need to give yourself a bit of a break and not be so hard on yourself about this issue.
I hope that you are able to work something out with your teacher and please let us know how you make out with this. In the meantime, try to relax a little (I know, easier said than done) so that you can have a better day today.
Every little bit helps, please donate to HW if you can! http://www.healingwell.com/donate
I am in no way a medical professional, any advice given is purely on an amateur level.
Please seek professional advice from your doctor.
Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety
Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Lunesta, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER, Valium
“People have two ears and one mouth for a reason; you need to listen twice as much as you talk.”
Top Fuel pro - Bob Vandergriff, Jr
Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea
Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin LA, Rozerem, Valium
Well, I talked to my teacher today. It went well actually. I thought it would since she is really nice and she understood the other dyay. I let her know my worries and how I felt and she was on track with me. She was very understanding also. She wants me to try to give it to at least her and another person or so...just so that I am taking a step. She wants to help me take a step which I think is kind of cool! I mean, she cares enough and knows its a problem and she's trying to help me! And then I have to turn my typed speech, that I can do.
But, I am really appreciative of her wanting to help me so.... She also said she would talk to my school counselor about it...(the same one I talk too) Yikes! I have no idea what she is going to say, but at this point, I dont care! As long as I dont have to get on stage in front of everyone! lol =] I will do my best at the rest! Although, I still have not written my speech.... I should be getting on that. I have never written a speech before and I dont want it to be bad or stupid if I have to read it to her...
She said we would talk more about it tomorrow and we would figure things out! I am so grateful to have her, some teachers wouldnt care and they would just let me fail! So, I am very happy she is helping me! I will let you guys know what happens tomorrow! Thanks for everything!
I'm so glad things went so well for you today. It sounds like you have exactly the right kind of teacher to help you hrough this. And it's great that you're willing to give the speech to her and one other person as a way to make yourself feel a little stronger.
Bravo to you. Go get 'em!
Hi Tennis: I want to add myself to the list of everyone who is so proud of you. Stepping up and talking to your teacher must have been so difficult. Like you, I do not share any personal details about myself unless I absolutely have to and hearing about what you did shows me how much strength you have.
I had a really bad experience in college with a professor in a speech class. So many years later, I joined a national speech association called "Toastmasters". And that literally changed my life. Maybe some day when you are ready with your life and circumstances you may have opportunity to do something like this as well. But in the meantime to know your limits and speak up for yourself - to me that is just as hard as giving the speech. Way to go girl!!!
Meanwhile, if its not too late, I would love to offer up my services. I love writing in any manner and if you would like some help with someone to review a draft, to bounce ideas back and forth with, help with questions, or anything please let me know. Maybe it might help you feel better about things beforehand? Just a thought! I'll keep checking online. I know that I can't post my e-mail address here, but if you do decide to take me up on my offer we could always figure out how to get in touch.
Again, I'm so happy for you. Between having the school counselor and really handling this situation so well- it shows how far you have come and how much you are truly capable of.