First of all I am so sorry you have lived through this all these years. It may have helped if your parents had backed you and not given in to her but their mistake was thinking they were her parents and not you. They did what often happens in a divorce, the non-custodial parent will attempt to buy the child's love and loyalty and it works for some.
My ex tried it with my children but he did not have the staying power to hang around and continue his behavior so my hubby, their stepfather, is the one they call Dad.
Some day your daughter will realize that she has made a mistake, especially when she is a Mother. For now, you must believe that you did your best, you are a good Mother and no, do not feel guilty for wanting to let go and let her move in with your Grandparents. I truly know how hurt you are by all this but please remember that you are more than just a Mother, you are a wonderful, caring human who deserves love and respect.
Gentle hugs to you my dear friend.Kitt
I am so sorry you are hurt and I think you have a right to be as your parents actions have contributed to much of the issues with your daughter. I know that it is extremely difficult to fight the pain and the hurt so reach out and take our hands, we will be beside you always.
You have lost the dream of raising your daughter and sharing a Mother and Daughter relationship that you wanted to have. She is choosing someone else to live with and I do understand your hurt.Hugs to you hun and hold on. It will get better.Kitt
Wow you have been through sooo much and yet you have survived - you are a brave and strong woman - and a wonderful mum - be proud
Here's a thought - do you think it's possible that your daughter can see the competition between you and your parents - and plays on this just a little for attention - whether it's good or bad..maybe it's time to stand back and observe from distance and see what is really going on...this may seem a little harsh...but it's just a thought I had when I read you post.
Hope everything sorts itself out soon. Keep posting.