Fear of going crazy!!!

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eyelashes
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 5/11/2008 11:58 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Everyone!

I am new member here, and just recently facing the world of anxiety and panic attacks. I had my first panic attack 2 years ago. When it happened, I had no clue what was happening to me, thought I was having a heart attack (I'm 24). I never knew such a state of mind existed.

The panic attacks and anxiety have been off and on over the last 2 years, usually only during stressful times.

But here's my problem. I have this HUGE fear that I'm going to go crazy. And then I start panicing about how my family would feel if their daughter or sister "lost it"?? Sometimes the fear is so great that I think I say things in my head just because I am fearing that I will think it.

Sometimes the feelings can last all day if I don't find some way to occupy my mind. But once night comes I fear going to sleep as my mind runs rampant.

Is this part of the anxiety? Or is this a whole other problem?
 
Does anyone experience something similar? Am I going to eventually "lose it"??
 

jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 5/12/2008 1:59 AM (GMT -7)   

The good news 'eyelashes' is that you have come to the right place for help and support..Welcome to HW :-)

Crazy? - No...

Suffering Panic and Anxiety which sometimes feels like u going Crazy ?- Yes (I should know - I have been there many times over the years - still here to tell the tale :-) )

I am wondering if you are on meds for anxiety? If not - I would suggest going to your doc. and telling him what's going on with you just now - just like you told us..If you are on meds I would suggest a review of them...Meds don't have to be forever - they can just be a temporary help while we are going thru a rough patch...

Most of all I would like to reassure you that with the right help, maybe some meds and even a dose of counselling - that you Will be ok :-) I promise..

I know there will be some wonderful understanding and help coming your way from everyone here at HW..Keep posting.

Maree


 
  •  'Raindrops on roses..'
  •  'Peace of mind will come to us when we are happy with 'not knowing'...
  •  'No more stinkin thinkin...'
  •  'It's not how we survive the storm..But how we Dance in the Rain..'
 
 
 
 
 
 


panic queen
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 56
   Posted 5/12/2008 4:24 AM (GMT -7)   
Eyelashes,
Hi
When my panic started, I was about your age also. The "fear" is unbelieveable.
It is like a small snowball that gets larger, and larger. I sometimes felt / feel like "Chicken Little".
This is part of anxiety. It seems overwhelming doesn't it? Reasurre yourself, that this is just part of it, and try to divert your mind somewhere else with something else.
I would also suggest seeing your Dr for some medication for times like these for
yourself. You will feel much better with some help when you have the "fear"



L

wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 5/12/2008 4:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Eyelashes,
 
First, Welcome to Healing Well.  The members here are wonderful, they are helpful, thoughtful, caring and a great source of knowledge.  You'll find a great amount of resources via members, resource links, etc.  One of the resources is to the right, just click on the Anxiety-Panic link and it will take you to the list of resources available to you.  Another resource that may be of value to you is in the Anxiety-Panic Resources link at the top of this page (tan area).  In that area, at the bottom, are two links - one is called CBT Therapy - What is it? and the other is Relaxation Techniques.  The techniques may be of great use to you while you are having an attack. 
 
Are you going crazy?  No, not at all - it sounds more like anxiety/panic disorder to me in my opinion.  As you can see from this board this is a VERY common disorder and we try our best to help each out with this.
 
The biggest thing I find that helps me is try to focus on something other than what has triggered the attack; it's not an easy thing to do.  But maybe having someone talking to you telling you that you will be okay, that nothing will hurt you and that this will pass may be helpful to you.  Reassurance really does help.
 
I would also go along with Maree's suggestion of seeing a doc about meds if you aren't on them already and if you are seeing if the dosing is correct or may need to be changed for awhile.  It can sometimes take several tries before you find the right medication that will work.  Counseling may also be a good route for your for awhile too.
 
Just remember that you are not alone in this battle and you now have the Healing Well family to help you through this.  Please keep posting and we will be sure to help you however we can.
 
Take care and welcome to Healing Well,
Wen

Co-Moderator Anxiety/Panic Disorders

Every little bit helps, please donate to HW if you can!   http://www.healingwell.com/donate 

I am not a medical professional, any advice give is purely from personal experience.

Always seek professional advice from your doctor.

Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea

Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin LA, Rozerem, Valium

 “Be a good listener.  Your ears will never get you into trouble.” - Frank Tyger


eyelashes
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 5/12/2008 7:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you kindly for all your support. It's so difficult to convince oneself that I am "okay" when I start feeling this way. It's easy to convince yourself that this is for real.

One question, I try to fight the "crazy" feeling so bad, but it can become difficult. Am I supposed to just let myself feel it? I get so worried that once I open myself up to the feeling, that I will forever be crazy and never go back to normal.

As for meds, my doctor prescribed me Clonazepam just to take every now and then when sleeping becomes difficult. I took half of one last night and it took about 4 hours to fall asleep.

I think I will look into couselling. It's just I usually only think of it when I am in the middle of one of my attacks. And then I'm convinced they'll lock me up and lable me "insane" if you know what I mean lol.

Again - thanks for support!!! If anyone else has felt similar things, please let me know!

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/12/2008 9:53 AM (GMT -7)   

eyelashes

A Warm Welcome to HealingWell and the A & P Forum.  As the wise ones that have posted before me have said you have come to the right place as we all understand anxiety and panic.  You will find lots of caring members here ready to suppot you.

I am Kitt and try to remember this when you are into a anxiety or panic attack:

It does not matter if you feel frightened, disorientated, dreamlike, or unsteady. These feelings are an exaggeration of the normal bodily reactions to stress.
Just because you have these sensations doesn't mean you are crazy. These feelings are just unpleasant and frightening, not dangerous. Nothing worse will happen to you.

Let your feelings come. . Don't run away from panic. When you feel panic build up, take a deep breath and as you breathe out, let go. Keep trying. Stay there almost as if you were floating in space. Don't fight the feeling of panic. Accept it; you can deal with it.

Try to make yourself as comfortable as possible without escaping. If you're on a street, lean against a post or a store wall. If you're at the cosmetics department of a store, find a quieter counter or corner. If you're in a boutique, tell the salesperson you don't feel well and want to sit for a while. Do not jump into a car and go home in fear.

Don't indulge in stinkin thinking, "Why can't I be normal ? Why does this have to happen to me?" Just accept what is happening to you. If you do this, what you fear most will not happen.

Think about what is really happening to your body at this moment. Do not think "Something terrible is going to happen. I must get out." Repeat to yourself "I am ok, I will not die or lose control."

I have to practice the "I am okay"  frequently when my anxiety spikes.  Just stay in the moment and don't worry about yesterday or anticipate what might happen tommorow.  Just live today. Laugh often, dream big and reach for the stars. 

We are here to help you, take our hands in friendship.

Hugs
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


percycat
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 1952
   Posted 5/13/2008 9:22 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello and welcome!

In my worst times of anxiety and panic, I have definitely wondered if I was having a nervous breakdown, losing my ability to function, and maybe should just check myself into a psych ward for a while. I think these a pretty common feelings in the middle of a panic attack, and it's very hard to talk yourself down from them. Do know, though, that if you were really going crazy, you probably wouldn't be sound enough in mind to tell -- you'd probably think you were "normal." It feels even worse when you throw in the worry about "what will my family/coworkers/friends think if they find out?"

I had an extremely bad period of this kind of thinking earlier this winter, but with a change in my medication, that aspect of my anxiety is gone now. I also tried to plan my options for what I could and couldn't do or how I would handle trying to work and be around people while feeling so close to the edge mentally. I thought about how much sick leave I have, who I'd tell the whole story to and who I'd just brush off, etc., and I realized that if I did really crack (which in fact wasn't going to happen), I had alternatives that weren't so scary as I'd imagined.

Remember that what you're feeling is a very common reaction to anxiety in a lot of people, and see whether counseling, relaxation, or medication can make an improvement for you.

Good luck, eyelashes!
percycat

peacesoul
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 2446
   Posted 5/13/2008 10:26 AM (GMT -7)   
percycat said...
Hello and welcome!

In my worst times of anxiety and panic, I have definitely wondered if I was having a nervous breakdown, losing my ability to function, and maybe should just check myself into a psych ward for a while. I think these a pretty common feelings in the middle of a panic attack, and it's very hard to talk yourself down from them. Do know, though, that if you were really going crazy, you probably wouldn't be sound enough in mind to tell -- you'd probably think you were "normal." It feels even worse when you throw in the worry about "what will my family/coworkers/friends think if they find out?"

I had an extremely bad period of this kind of thinking earlier this winter, but with a change in my medication, that aspect of my anxiety is gone now. I also tried to plan my options for what I could and couldn't do or how I would handle trying to work and be around people while feeling so close to the edge mentally. I thought about how much sick leave I have, who I'd tell the whole story to and who I'd just brush off, etc., and I realized that if I did really crack (which in fact wasn't going to happen), I had alternatives that weren't so scary as I'd imagined.

Remember that what you're feeling is a very common reaction to anxiety in a lot of people, and see whether counseling, relaxation, or medication can make an improvement for you.

Good luck, eyelashes!
percycat
 
I would have to say this post relates to me as well.

Crazy is not a word I would use, but scared more like it
Crazy = pedophiles and or serial killers.
If you are being chased by a bear, you run screaming right? Well this doesn't mean you're going crazy, it means you're scared out of your mind!

Fear is normal, ride the wave and it will pass and in the meantime talk to yourself, but not out loud in public, because people will think you're crazy...haha!
No seriously, give yourself a good pep talk when this fear sets in. It's our perception that is out of tune.


The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong in the broken places
 


wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 5/16/2008 4:35 AM (GMT -7)   
Eyelashes,
 
You have been given some great advice and I hope you can use some of them.  As Percycat said, if you were really going crazy you probably wouldn't even know it.  Just try to ride it out, stay in the moment, and try to tell yourself that you WILL be okay and nothing will hurt you.  Please keep posting to let us know how you are doing - remember that here at Healing Well, we do care about you.
 
Take care,
Wen

Co-Moderator Anxiety/Panic Disorders

Every little bit helps, please donate to HW if you can!   http://www.healingwell.com/donate 

I am not a medical professional, any advice give is purely from personal experience.

Always seek professional advice from your doctor.

Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea

Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin LA, Rozerem, Valium

 “Be a good listener.  Your ears will never get you into trouble.” - Frank Tyger


jazzy29
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 43
   Posted 10/22/2008 2:22 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi eyelashes
I suffer from exactly the same thing as you and find it unbearable when going through it!
I have many fears that manifest through these periods and they are so frightening that I find it so hard to believe that it is just anxiety!!
I can have the underlying feeling all day or be fighting them off and it ends up getting worse resulting in a full blown panic. Just lately I have been having PA nearly every day! I also would not describe them as the usual PA as i do not get fearful of not breathing properly or anything like that, for me its the intense feeling of turning crazy any second or actually being crazy in that moment and remaining in that state of fear. I generally feel really weak and shaky and dont feel in control, i find it hard to keep still and i can also get the chills or feel really hot.....and that is just a few of my symptoms!! they can slightly change each time. Do you or anyone else get similar feelings?
I hope you are still here as the original post was a few months ago. I truly hope you are starting to feel better now.
Best wishes
x

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/22/2008 6:10 AM (GMT -7)   

jazzy,

Hello and Welcome to HealingWell.  I am so sorry you are having these problems. 

You are not alone...I frequently feel that there is something wrong with my body. I have worrying thoughts and anxiety that escalates on a whim. Sometimes the anxiety and thoughts that I will not get through the panicky feeling one more time are controllable and sometimes not. My neck and shoulders are always tense and cause me to have neck and back pain. I try to feel comfortable around people but sometimes I just want to be home in my safe place and all I can think of is how to escape. I know it is my own self consciousness and insecurities. I have a hand tremor that gets worse when I am anxious so I try not to be in a position where people are watching me.

The following books are both good.  I know they have been used by the members with improvement in their anxeity and paniic. 

The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook, Fourth Edition

Pass Through Panic: Freeing Yourself from Anxiety and Fear
by: Claire Weekes

We also have some great reference materials posted at the to by Wen4003.

Take care and keep posting.

Kitt

 



 


 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


jazzy29
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 43
   Posted 10/22/2008 11:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Kitt
Your words are reassuring. For me it is like the anxiety develops new and scarier ways to make an impact. I would say my first PA was what I wouls call a 'classic' PA, when I would hyperventilate and be scared I was about to die of some major health problem, these started when I was pregnant at 16. (I was always a very anxious child and would fear all diseases!)
They would come on and off after that for years, I had lots of counselling which helped then I was free from panic for about 2 years but would always worry about stuff. I have had health anxiety for ages but now I am going through a house sale and having a teenage daughter!! they have come back with avengence, I would say that I have developed panic disorder now as been having PAs every day and feeling very anxious in between. As i am writing now I am feeling OK. I have started some counselling again and also had some sessions of EFT. I am too scared to take meds as I went to the GP after my 1st recent PA and got meds but after 2 days on them I had the worst PA ever which lasted about 3 hours on and off! I think that was what started my complete fear of having another 1. I have just bought some vitamin b complex and magnesium which i have been told helps so will try then as there are no written side effects!! Anyway thats me for now, its cathartic writing this but it does feel a bit lke im exposing myself.
Best wishes
C

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/22/2008 2:25 PM (GMT -7)   

Jazzy,

There is something comforting about baring your soul to the members of A & P and remaining anonymous. :-) When panic strikes remember this:

It does not matter if you feel frightened, disorientated, dreamlike, or unsteady. These feelings are an exaggeration of the normal bodily reactions to stress.

Just because you have these sensations doesn't mean you are crazy. These feelings are just unpleasant and frightening, not dangerous. Nothing worse will happen to you.

Let your feelings come. . Don't run away from panic. When you feel panic build up, take a deep breath and as you breathe out, let go. Keep trying. Stay there almost as if you were floating in space. Don't fight the feeling of panic. Accept it; you can deal with it.

Try to make yourself as comfortable as possible without escaping. If you're on a street, lean against a post or a store wall. If you're at the cosmetics department of a store, find a quieter counter or corner. If you're in a boutique, tell the salesperson you don't feel well and want to sit for a while. Do not jump into a car and go home in fear.

Don't indulge in stinkin thinking, "Why can't I be normal ? Why does this have to happen to me?" Just accept what is happening to you. If you do this, what you fear most will not happen.

Think about what is really happening to your body at this moment. Do not think "Something terrible is going to happen. I must get out." Repeat to yourself "I am ok, I will not die or lose control."

Try to distract yourself from what is going on inside you. Look at your surroundings. See the other people around you. .They are with you, not against you.

When the panic subsides, let your body go loose, take a deep breath, and go on with your day. Remember, each time you cope with panic and anxiety, you reduce your fear.


 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


crz4mrx
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 10/22/2008 5:49 PM (GMT -7)   
I am not sure if this is the correct thread for this post, but here goes. I am suffering from Depression and GAD. I tried both Zoloft and cymbalta, and although they seemed to help depression they made my anxiety worse. Xanax seemed to help somewhat, but my Dr is not good about giving it to me. This has been going on for about 10 months. Was severe at first, lost 10lbs in 10 days, now months later, weight is back, but my anxiety is just sort of always there, along with depression. I went through this once before 20 years ago with postpartum that lasted about 6 months. Thought I would never experience it again. I went throughan extremely bad situation 10 months ago, that may have kicked it off, but I am usually so strong. It really sucks to feel this way. At home I could just walk up and down the hallway and not get anything done. Does anyone know if Lexapro helps with both anxiety and depression. I am afraid to keep trying, since I have not had good luck with the two I have tired. Any advice?? What about natural supplements?

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/22/2008 8:42 PM (GMT -7)   
crz4mrx
Welcome to HealingWell and we are very happy that you found us.
 
I am so sorry your going through this rough time.
 
Lexapro works  for anxiety and depression as does Cymbalta and some of the other newer meds.  I really need to refer you to your pysician to pick out the right med for you.
 
Each person will react different to the meds.
We do have the Depression forum too if you want to check that out.
Again a warm welcome
Kitt
 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

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