Hey Junebug, I'm sorry for your loss. I understand what it feels like to mourn "what could have been". I know what a great person you are and I'm sure that she would have loved you if she was in the right " mental space" to contact you. Hopefully in her spirit she knows that you care even if you didn't get the chance to share it. I hope this makes sense. Sounds like Patte is a gem, I hope you really enjoy your time together while she visits.
hugs for you honey.
First of all, I am so sorry to hear of the death of your sister. You are grieving and that is good and it is normal. When someone dies we will mourn for what might have been. I know exactly how you feel. You always wonder how things might have been if you had your sister in your life. You had a dream that someday your family would reunite and with your sister's death that dream has died too. You have my prayers to help you through this sad time.
I am happy that you did get to see your other sister, and mall crawling is great therapy too.
I am glad you can come here and feel comfortable sharing with your HW family. We care and we are here for you.