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maidmarian4
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 5/22/2008 11:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi- I'm glad I found this group.  I am 27, have a great hubby of 7 1/2 yrs, 3 kids (5,4,1), 2 dogs, 2 cats and a rabbit.  I love drawing, animals and making friends.  I am also a busy SAHM.
 
I've been diagnosed with anxiety for 6 years now (but have had it since I was a kid).  My anxiety is anything from worrying, insomnia stuff, being too "giddy", feeling like someone is going to hurt me (really irrationally) and feeling like I am seeing things.  I've been on Zoloft in the past, but the 3rd time around it had no effect.  I tried Prozac and that made me too happy and unrealistic.  But, then I started on Wellbutrin, and it seemed to make a difference.
 
Well, first, I'm not very good at taking my meds.  Anyone have/had the same problem and would like to share ideas on how to get me to take it (I need to remember, and I need to want to take it).  I also don't want to go to the Dr to go over the meds and it's affect so I can get a refill.  I don't dislike Drs though - just don't like talking about me being crazy (in my eyes).
 
Also, my house is a MESS.  I don't have a ton of support with my husband on house chores, and I think I've made that one of my reasons for not being so good at cleaning house.  I dunno.  I think there are also "deeper" meanings, but I don't have money for a psychologist or psychiatrist to help me figure them out (wish I did).  Anyway, after sharing my concerns about myself to my hubby, he suggested I try to find others w/ my plight so I could be motivated w/ people also struggling.  I haven't been able to find a group like that, so I thought I'd start here.  I look forward to the day when I can feel mostly ok w/ having random people show up at my house.  I would also like to feel like I am teaching my kids to be clean - and to feel comfortable asking friends over to a fairly clean home.
 
I know you don't know me, and so it is hard to make a suggestion w/ such little information - but anything may help!

nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 5/23/2008 12:37 AM (GMT -7)   

Hello MaidMarian, a very warm welcome to healing well, I'm so glad you found us here and I hope we can help.

It sounds like you have a beautiful family there. (I love animals too altho I can't talk my cats into accepting a rabbit!) Families can also be a lot of hard work and it sounds like you are busy. Don't beat yourself up too much for having a bit of mess around, you are a mum!!

I've found that it's easier to remember to take my meds if I take them at the same time evey day and keep them under my nose (or near the chocolate).  I also used to keep a checklist on my fridge to make sure I had taken them by the end of the day if I got busy or didn't have any chocolate. Not likely!

There are many wonderful people and resources here at healingwell, maybe check out the resources list at the top for some ideas.  I'm sure some more people will be along soon to say Hi and give you some input.  Again, welcome, I hope to chat again.


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/23/2008 7:52 AM (GMT -7)   

Hello MaidMarian,

Welcome to HealingWell and the A & P Forum.  I am Kitt.

4 children, how fun.  That is what I had and there were times I felt I was really losing my mind :)  That is a lot of responsibility and I found I was often isolated from others because my husband worked swing shifts and I did not know many people in this town when we moved here.  I was at home alone with the children and by the end of the day I was beat and worn out and lonely.
 
Now that I look back I think I would have slowed down and spent the time with the children and not worried about some of the other things.  We do not have to be the perfect Moms or housekeepers to make a house a home. 
 
I do not like going to the Drs. either, but I have found that I just go as it is the only choice I have.  Sometimes letting out all your feelings to your Doctor will help he/she prescribe your meds and understand you better.  Try to build a trust relationship with your physician. :-)
I would really like to see you tell your physician all your sx and get a good check up to make sure none of your issues are due to a physical problem.
 
WE are here and I know you will come to feel comfortable here and you will find the members are warm and caring................take care and keep posting
 
Kitt
 
 
 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


percycat
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 1952
   Posted 5/23/2008 6:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi and welcome!

I find that the best way to remember my meds is also to take them at the same time each day. Not time by the clock, mind you, but time as in part of my schedule. I have pretty irregular hours quite often, so there are some meds that I always take as I'm getting ready for bed, and I try to take my vitamins every morning with breakfast (kinda hard on those days that I don't eat breakfast).

I've read (once) that it takes 30 days to establish a habit, and even if it's not true in general, it is true for me. So when I needed to start meds in the first place, I had to force myself to do it, to make that artificial commitment just for the first few weeks/month. After that, it was easier.

As the folks on here are so good and supportive in saying, take baby steps. You don't have to change or improve everything all at once, just one little thing at a time. Maybe try starting with your meds, and then take it from there.

percycat

ColtsFan
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 5/23/2008 10:25 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello.
I have the same problem with house cleaning with my 2 daughters.  They are both 17 and their rooms are disgusting to me.  I'm not quite OCD bad about having my house clean but I do like a very clean house.  After years of battling with the kids I have finally gotten them to the point where they will keep my part of the house clean (which is everywhere except their rooms) if I let up on them about their rooms.  It isn't easy to do and I have to keep their doors closed.  People who come in our house always say how clean it is but if they ever went in the kids rooms they would freak out.  A few years ago one of them won a hermit crab at a carnival so we bought it a little tank to put it in.  Somehow it got out and we have never found it.  I just have this image in my mind of them moving out in a couple years and me cleaning out the room and finding this huge crab that has been living off the food they can never seem to get back to the kitchen.  Not to mention the 1000 remote controls we have lost over the years.

nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 5/23/2008 10:46 PM (GMT -7)   

Oh Coltsfan! A missing hermit crab Arrghh! You are far braver than me! I would be running around squealing :-)

MaidMarian, just checking in to say hi and see how you are getting on, cheers


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


lavendar
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 450
   Posted 5/24/2008 3:16 AM (GMT -7)   
Your symptoms don't sound at all like the anxiety I get. I would love to get giddy on one of my meds. I have white coat syndrome. Have an attack, sometimes a week before I go to DR. I take atavan when the anxiety gets really bad and zoloft on a daily basis. I was recently told by the psyc. that I should not take the atavan because it is habbit forming. What then??? I've been on it for at least 20 years, or something similar. I have the weekly containers for my meds. and I keep them next to the coffee maker. Itake half of them with my morning coffee. The rest I take in the evening , anytime after 8:00pm. If I didn't have the atavan I would end up in the ER every time I got a panic attack. And all the would do was give me adavan and a large bill to go along with it. june

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/24/2008 6:36 AM (GMT -7)   
Welcome to HW
I see you have had plenty of greetings and input already
Sorry not been around been out of the loop ....

I have never gotten giddy on my Valium either ( meds)

I am hoping you are having good day so far today and will continue to post...share and become part of the HW family here

LYN
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
 
Moderator @ Anxiety Panic..Alzheimer's..Co mod @ Crohns
                               FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
 
   
 
                   
 


maidmarian4
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 5/24/2008 8:33 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all for the warm welcome and advice. I'm thinking the checklist thing for meds is the only thing I haven't tried - so I'll try that out. :-)

As for the house mess. It's not that I am OCD about the cleanliness of the house (there are many other OCD things I worry about LOL) - it is that I think I just kinda make myself "forget" about it. Then, I look at it on a daily basis and remember - but then zone myself out of thinking about it again. The only time the house really gets OK clean is when visitors are coming. Our poor babysitters never see the house decently clean because I just have phazed out so much for when they've come over that I convince myself that they are used to it, and wouldn't expect anything more of me. But, I know I can actually do more! And I do not want an exceptionally clean home - but a "lived in" type home... not a pigstye.

For example, we've had a new kitchen put in (we had our dishwasher leak and ruin the floor) about 4 weeks ago, and I STILL haven't put at least 50% of the kitchen back together. I just feel that is so pathetic. My kids should be able to get a clean cup from a put away place, and I clean it w/in a few days so they continue to have clean dishes. Instead, I buy paper/plastic products. While this proved great when we had no kitchen, now I really need to get us back to "normal".

Another question - How many of you think you see things but know they aren't there - but you can't convince yourself they are not there (all at the same time - not as an afterfact).

maidmarian4
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 5/24/2008 8:39 AM (GMT -7)   
Oh, and forgot to address the "giddy" stuff. I don't mean I get happy. I mean that I get a feeling to laugh out loud when it is not really appropriate. It doesn't happen all the time, and when I was younger I was worse about it. But, it is still a real feeling, and quite annoying the times I can't fight the urge to laugh or get extra excited about something.

ColtsFan
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 5/24/2008 6:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Sorry.  I didn't mean to insinuate you had OCD or lived in a pigstye.  I was really speaking more about myself.  I do think if I did all the things I wanted to do I'd have OCD really bad.  I used to try and make my daughters keep their rooms and the rest of the house up to what I considered to be clean.  I finally realized it wasn't them so much not trying so much as my standards were too high.  That is why I let up on them with their rooms although it really drives me crazy when I go in them.    Oh well, enough of the house cleaning.
 
As for the seeing things and being giddy, I really don't have those symptoms and would hate to even comment since I only joined this group a few days before you.  It seems like there are a lot of people here that are more experienced and willing to help though.  I would think there would be a medication or CBT that would help with that.
 
Best of luck to you and hang in there.

nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 5/24/2008 11:06 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi,

I think I get the "giddy" thing too, but not from meds.  It feels like a bit of a hysteria I can't repress, it made me laugh at a funeral once and was horrible.   sometimes I have disturbing images or impulses in my life (like falling over on an escalator and cracking my knees open and some others I wouldn't want to post).  It feels awful, but it passes...

You are not alone in these fellings okay? Just keep posting and asking questions, we are really supportive here and non-judgemental. Stay well sweetie.


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 5/25/2008 9:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi MaidMarian,
 
I'm sorry I haven't greeted you until now but I haven't had a chance to be on the boards for a couple of days due to some family issues. 
 
You have found a great place to be as this is a great community that is a wealth of information vi a members and the resources available to us.  To the right you can click on the Anxiety-Panic link and it will take you to the a list of resources for you.  Also at the top of the page is an Anxiety-Panic Resources link that has two threads in it - one about CBT Therapy and one about Relaxation Techniques.  They are both good reads and may be of great use to you.
 
For me to remember to take my meds, I use a couple of different things.  My son is also on meds and we have to take ours both in the morning and at bedtime, so I remember those.  The only ones I forget are my noon time meds, so I have set up a reminder to come up on my computer so that I don't forget them.
 
I don't get the giddy feeling you speak of, I'm just mostly scared and anxious most of the time.  As for the seeing things, yes there are times that I think I see things out of the corner of my eye and cannot convince myself that it isn't there.  It's hard for me to understand this and to control it - I just don't know what to do about it.  The next time I go to the doc, I will be mentioning this as it is quite unnerving.
 
My house is usually a mess in the fact of clutter, not dusted and not vacuumed enough.  I really need to dust and vacuum more because my daughter has allergies, but it's so hard to get the energy to do it.  But I just need to make myself do it in order to help her.
 
Again, welcome to Healing Well.  Keep posting and let us know how things are going for you.
 
Take care,
Wen

Co-Moderator Anxiety/Panic Disorders

Every little bit helps, please donate to HW if you can!   http://www.healingwell.com/donate 

I am not a medical professional, any advice give is purely from personal experience.

Always seek professional advice from your doctor.

Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea

Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin LA, Rozerem, Valium

 “Be a good listener.  Your ears will never get you into trouble.” - Frank Tyger


maidmarian4
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 5/25/2008 4:33 PM (GMT -7)   
Coltsfan- You are fine. It's hard for me to convey what I mean. LOL. I feel like I do keep a "pigstye" for a home. There are things that normal people would have cleaned up, but I don't. That is really my concern. I was also just saying that I do not have much OCD in the area of cleanliness of the house. Hope that makes more sense!

Oh, I checked out the "MoodGym" thing, and think that as long as I spend some more time on it, it should help a litte.

Thanks again for all the support. :-)

nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 5/25/2008 11:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi MaidMarian, I love MoodGym, I'm glad you like it too..are you having better luck with the meds??? Let us know K?

Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/26/2008 6:14 AM (GMT -7)   
HI there
Moodgym is awesome IMHO
I am glad you are giving it a shot

I like Kitt spent way too much time when kids were young ..alone and with the house spotless.my kids were making their own beds at early age and helping me with plastic dishes as well
I had always taught them to keep things clean BUT I am a severe OCD with cleanliness or I should say WAS
I have learnt the hard way that it is so much easier now for me to "say ah the dang few dishes could wait til morning" sometimes I can do it other times I cannot
My daughter is now developed real OCD habits just like mine and will not leave a dish in sink or anything left "looking" messsy" ya know

All my nic nacs and pics HAVE to be balanced ..my doc says this is beacuse I NEED the control inside my home as I do not have it out of it .......know what I mean??

Anyways back to you
DO not beat self up
Take baby steps
Try putting a lil note or a goal down to get something done for a certain day and make sure you stick to it ....check it off and on with the next
Even if it is to do laundry wash dry and fold .......put away at least you have accomplished it
And I believe you will feel better about your self as well
Your kids rooms sounded like my Caits and I was constantly at her about it lol........then hubby told me "she is a Teen lay off of her....next thing I know it is always cleaned before she lvs for school " whoulda thunk
WHILE you are trying to acheive the "goals" you set out have your kids join in
Make it a "Fun Thing" kinda.......assign them lil things to do and I know they may not do it your way but STILL give them the " thumbs up and way to go kiddo" and go back later IF you must and fix it your way lol.I did and Cait never caught on .at least I was never told she did
I would have a piece of bristol board and Cait would get stars or whatever for the things she did and extra for things she tried to do
Also she was then able to leave her room open ( I cannot stand that either lol) and she actually had PRIDE in her eyes when she brought ppl in or my friends would remark about her room being so nice
I would not suggesst you GO as far as I did though really roflmbo as like I said now Cait is OCD.....
She is a teen and for the past bit I have been very ill well my daughter has literally DONE everything around here PLUS cook and do the dishes...after spending her day at school.......Yes I am so proud of her and I do hope you can find a "FUN WAY " to get your kids involved with helping in their rooms and other things that need to be done
It is fun quality time IF you make if fun ( have a pillow case fight in the middle of it...DO NOT lose feathers lol).
When hubby is home have him do some things as well with the kids like if there are home repairs get hammers and play things or even real small tools for them whether they are girls or boys and have them help dad.........THEY will be proud I am sure......
I swear sometimes you never know what treaures you will find lol when going thru things so tell them you are going on a "Treasure hunt lol in their rooms " Talk to them about things you find...perhaps things they made a couple of yrs ago and put it in a "Special" place
I know your house is not a "Pigsty" I am just trying to throw out some ideas to get the kids involved with you and helping you ..
This gives them the teaching of responsibily as well IMHO
Maybe I am just rambling I dont know?? But I do hope that SOMTEHING I have said will help out here
I also want to say you sound like a very good MOM who does have her hands full ...........
I am glad to see that you found us here and the CBT workshop /book is a great start as well ........

YOU have taken a couple of great steps so far sweetie
I KNOW you can take some more BABY steps
WE will be here to help and support you all we can.......STAY with us plz

Take care and have fun.....you really can.........LOL yeah

LYN.


  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
 
Moderator @ Anxiety Panic..Alzheimer's..Co mod @ Crohns
                               FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
 
   
 
                   
 

Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 5/26/2008 7:19:39 AM (GMT-6)


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/26/2008 7:08 AM (GMT -7)   
OMG I must be feeling better..lol
I am rambling on hre like a mad woman ....lol

Welcome to HW
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
 
Moderator @ Anxiety Panic..Alzheimer's..Co mod @ Crohns
                               FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
 
   
 
                   
 


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 5/26/2008 6:36 PM (GMT -7)   
Welcome back mad woman!! It's lovely to hear you ramble. :-)
Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


maidmarian4
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 5/26/2008 7:29 PM (GMT -7)   
LOL - I had fun reading those comments.

I really do need to make very small baby steps. Laundry is a good start because I have about 5 loads of clean clothes in my hallway I haven't put away for about 5 days! eek!

Georgie Girl
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 319
   Posted 5/27/2008 7:08 AM (GMT -7)   
LOL.  I am bipolar and suffer from severe anxiety.  My OCD involves buying things.  My house is a disaster too.  Can't tell you how many times I've bought an identical pair of shoes to a pair I already have because I can't find the first pair.   I was on Geodon for awhile (eventually caused my anxiety to get worse).  The Geodon helped my compulsive shopping but did nothing for my messy house.   I was slightly suicidal a couple of months ago with extreme anxiety but the thought of my husband and son having to sort through all that "stuff" caused me to rethink that.

Georgie Girl


quietpain
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 112
   Posted 5/27/2008 1:31 PM (GMT -7)   
When some people tak anti-depressant, espeacially  Przoac and Zoloft, it can either relive a depression you weren't aware of, bt often it is a sign that you may be slightly bipolar.  That is hoe a lot bipoar2 people relize they are bipolar.  When I hear giddy I often the of traditional hypomania in drug induced bipolaar. As lond as you never slip into mania and deep depression, I'd stick with it and do a mood chart.  Crazy or sane most moms (its worse the more kids you have) have meesy homes homes.  I am lucky my husband does out laudry and my oldest does his own.  It is a lovely tradtion that when you turn 13 you have to do your own laudry.   He does have a closet and large dresser, but he puts his dirty clother away and leaves the clean in a basket.  He isn't a bad kid, but I stay out of his room as much as possible since he has textbooks everywhere along with his some of his guitars. (He travels playing on cruises, the Canada Day parade, in Reno as a jazz guitarist.)  He is very talented and in all the AP claesses so I forgive for his disgusting room.
 
As far a remembering to take your meds:  I take 10 meds for mental health beyond anxiety and some have to be spaced aprt so they don't cause a fatatl reaction.  First I use a pill case, two for each day.  The both myself and my husband programed our phones to go off when it time to take my meds.about 15 min. after my husband's goes off, he calls to make sure I took the meds or if we need to reschedule the timing (we call the doctor on that.) I am only 31, but after 17 years of seririon mental health issues, one thing is true : you just get used to it.
 
 
quietpain
 

Anxious soul
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 69
   Posted 5/27/2008 2:09 PM (GMT -7)   

Sounds like you may be overwhelmed with your housecleaning and that may be why it isn't getting done.  I suggest not looking at the whole house at the same time.  Break it down to small achievable goals.  For instance, you could look at 1 room a day or 1 whole house chore (laundry, dusting, vaccuuming, etc) a day.  To be ready for those unexpected guests or just to have a place to go where there is not housework staring you  in your face, try to keep a main room picked up (not sterilized to the point that one would think Mary Poppins lives there)  at all times.  You could also try getting someone to come in and do a whole house cleaning for you (one time) and then just keep things manageable on a day to day basis with the 1 room or 1 chore idea.  In my experience, I find it is easier to maintain a clean house than it is a messy one.

-Soul


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/27/2008 2:50 PM (GMT -7)   

Soul.

Great advice, I had a freind that would clean one room at a time.

If I had to pick a room it would be the entry way..........does that count?

I loved it when my kids were at home because we all cleaned the house together.  Now I find it boring and I have a hard time forcing my self to do the chore.

My hubby does al the vacumning but I have a bad disc in my back so that is why. 

Hang in there Maidmarian.  Your part of this great family now.

Hugs
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/28/2008 4:26 AM (GMT -7)   
I think doing the one room or laundry to start will really help
THIS will give you the knowledge that you have attempted ..overcome and you are on your way to more......

LOL .........yes I ramble I know ...........part of the OCD......I think..........roflmbo........

YOU will do great and so glad you are part of our family here too

LYN
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
 
Moderator @ Anxiety Panic..Alzheimer's..Co mod @ Crohns
                               FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
 
   
 
                   
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/28/2008 4:28 AM (GMT -7)   
nono  NOw Now Sweet Megs..........
 
devil  ME ramble ....okay I guess I do a bit ...but JUST a tiny bit lol
 
Glad to be back and able to ramble .After I posted that I thought OMG I have totally LOST IT whatever IT is ......... yeah
 
Luvs ya
S.I.S. aka Ramblin Rose.......roflmbo
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
 
Moderator @ Anxiety Panic..Alzheimer's..Co mod @ Crohns
                               FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
 
   
 
                   
 

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