Saw an accident

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harlan
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/13/2008 10:44 AM (GMT -7)   
I was a little freaked out last night.  Sometimes I wonder if I am being punished with all these anxiety-provoking things going on in my life lately.
 
I was driving in Houston on the north freeway.  Then traffic came to a stop.  It was an odd time for traffic to be stopped but then I looked in the HOV lane and saw what I thought was a wreck.  Then as I creeped up to the accident area, traffic stopped again and there I was looking at the ground at a man bleeding all over the place.  This lady had a towel on his head trying to help him.  No ambulances or cops there yet so I assumed that it had just happened.
 
I got online and tried to find out what happened and only found out that it was an auto-pedestrian accident.  Some people made comments to the story and one person said he thought the pedestrian was actually one of the car owners from a wreck.  He was just standing outside his car and got hit.  I don't know what happened and the story I read said his condition is not known.  That has really been bothering me.  I've never seen anything like that up close.  I really didn't want to look but for some stupid reason, I looked anyway.
 
I can't find a follow-up story so when I finish writing this post, I am going to email the place I saw the story and see if I can find out what happened.  For some strange reason, I just have to know that the guy is ok.

Post Edited (harlan) : 6/13/2008 11:56:34 AM (GMT-6)


nervymeg
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Date Joined Jul 2006
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   Posted 6/13/2008 10:49 AM (GMT -7)   

Harlan,

That is really normal, you care and you want to check it's okay. I certainly would.  That must have been a scary experience for you. I hope you get some peace with this, it would drive me a little nutso not knowing about his staus too.  Keep us posted k? Bless


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harlan
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/13/2008 10:57 AM (GMT -7)   

As bad as the media is, I figured if the guy passed away, the media would have jumped on that but who knows?

 



nervymeg
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Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 6/13/2008 11:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Maybe, sometimes they keep it quiet until families know everything.  It's a big deal to see something like that, try not to dwell, but certainly let us know how you are feeling.  I saw a person on a bike  get run over and killed and it stayed with me for a while. Made me feel a bit scared at first, but I went to his funeral and it was such a beautiful tribute I could put it behind me. It's easy to get emotionally involved, and it's really ok. Hope you get some news soon.

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itsokay
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 6/13/2008 11:12 AM (GMT -7)   
That sounds really upsetting. I understand your need to know what happened after the trauma of witnessing something so unexpected and awful.

I got the feeling from what you wrote that you sort of felt your reaction was due to your anxiety issues. Is that right? Forgive me if I am wrong about that, but it gave me an interesting revelation: Most people who are not sociopaths would be very shaken by seeing that man lying there. I bet everyone else who saw what you saw yesterday went home feeling just as shaken and haunted. But, as I have seen in my own life, if you suffer from anxiety, you tend to not trust your own reactions - to think that you are over reacting due to your anxiety.

Of course, sometimes the anxiety DOES make one overreact, but those of us with anxiety tend to often get the message that we should just control our emotions, I think there is a tendency to sometimes feel a sense of guilt for our emotional reactions. Again, sorry if I am misreading your post, but it was a useful thought for me to have!

harlan
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/13/2008 11:18 AM (GMT -7)   

You pretty much read it right.  I went home thinking others just went home and got over it quick.  It certainly bothered me and I definitely thought it was due to my anxiety issues.  I figured most of the others who saw the accident have gone about their lives and put it out of their heads but for all I know, there could be others who have tried to find out what happened.  I just can't believe I can't find anything out from any of our local TV stations.  The only place I found anything about it was the newspaper. 

 


nervymeg
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   Posted 6/13/2008 11:27 AM (GMT -7)   
Harlan, itsokay got it spot on there (thanks). We tend to care about and dwell on things more than the average person. Sometimes I forget about that, and I thank you both for reminding me. It's our special human nature, we tend to care and worry a lot about others. It's a gift we should be thankful for (except when it upsets us too much.) I hope you get some peace. Keep us posted on how you are going.

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machelle
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Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 6/13/2008 11:53 AM (GMT -7)   
the sadest one i saw was we where coming back from the renaissance festival and these guys where weaving in out of traffic on a two way road, when they almost knocked us off the road i had this over whelming bad feeling, they a few minutes later killed a family of five mom dad three little ones, head on collision, was it worth it to them, both those idiots lived, people just need to slow down and be careful for sake of others , i still get up set ever time we pass that area. i know accidents do happen and sometimes the persons didn't mean too, but these guys where asking to hurt someone it was a hilly road

harlan
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/13/2008 12:35 PM (GMT -7)   
I got a dose of reality not too long ago. My friend I spoke about in other threads wanted a motorcycle and decided to take a motorcycle safety course. Me on a motorcycle is completely outside of my comfort zone but to be with him for the next two days, I took the course. I was nervous about it but did ok and then actually thought about getting a motorcycle. I had a good time in the training course and my friend took me to a few places to check out motorcycles.

When I told my husband about it, he just about blew a gasket. He said no way am I getting a motorcycle. I was so mad at him but me wanting a motorcycle was so outside of my norm that I didn't know what I was doing, anyway. It was really this addiction to my "friend" that got my mind screwed up.

A coworker of mine told me in the next few days that she was driving home and saw an accident. Apparently, a car cut another car off. The cut-off car swerved into the lane of an oncoming motorcycle and the motorcyclist swerved to avoid the car and ended up crashing into the concrete barrier. Killed instantly.... A friend from high school had a bad motorcycle accident a few years ago. He survived it but has permanent damage from it, and another guy from high school was killed on his motorcycle.

So, with all these deaths and accidents that I was told about in that short time, I realized....ok, maybe my husband is right. I finally came to my senses and realized that I never really wanted a motorcycle to begin with. I just wanted a connection to my friend. It was my husband who talked some sense into me!

People here in Houston drive crazy - as well as drivers in other cities, too, I'm sure - and people don't always notice motorcyclists or pedestrians.

I bet that accident stuck with you for a long time. Wonder what ended up happening to those guys? Wonder if they got a ticket or were charged with manslaughter? They should have gotten some sort of punishment and hopefully, they have some guilt but unfortunately, some people like that don't have guilt or feel remorse for what they did.

stkitt
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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/13/2008 1:03 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Guys,

All accidents that happen on the city streets and highways are public record. Look in the paper or go online and look in the paper.  Not all accidents make the news as in a large city they are happening all day long.

If it was a fatality you would have found it.

I was an ER nurse/nurse manager for 26 years.  Taking care of those people was my life and I miss it alot.  That is how I ended up here, trying to help others and of course help myself.

Also most of you may not know my own son died in a car crash at the age of 21.  He never went to the ER.  I saw him on TV under a tarp.

God Bless all the people who are in any accident.

Love
Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety, Panic & Depression 
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machelle
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 6/13/2008 2:36 PM (GMT -7)   
oh skitt i'm so sorry about your son, a parent should never have to experience a childs passing, you''ll get to see him again one day.

itsokay
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 6/13/2008 4:06 PM (GMT -7)   
That is so sad, kitt. I am sorry. What a horrible thing for you to go through.

percycat
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Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 1952
   Posted 6/13/2008 6:14 PM (GMT -7)   
I was visiting at a church - not my usual one - a couple of weeks ago. It's right on the main street of town, and in the middle of the sermon, an ambulance or police car went by with its siren on. The minister stopped right there and prayed for the folks who needed help from the vehicle. I thought it was an incredibly profound thing to do. I mean, we go to church for prayer among other things, but it's easy to get caught up in it as a ritual of sorts. Here he was modelling exactly what prayer is all about.

percycat

stkitt
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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/13/2008 7:05 PM (GMT -7)   

Thank you all for the kind words.  I loved doing the ambulance runs before our EMS all became paramedics.

What a wonderful moment in your church Percy.  Very Special

Bless you
Kitt


harlan
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/14/2008 7:18 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Kitt.  I am so sorry to hear about your son.  You must have been completely devastated.  I just don't know what to say except that I am so sorry.  That must be the worst thing - losing a child. 

I agree that if that accident had a fatality, I would have found it.  I've pretty much told myself that he's in the hospital or is home by now.  Especially since I only found the story in one place.  It just gave me an odd feeling inside seeing all the blood.

Thanks, everyone.  And Kitt, again I am so sorry you lost your son.  How long ago was that?  It still must hurt to this day.  I don't know if you ever get over losing a child. 

 

 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/14/2008 7:50 AM (GMT -7)   

Harlan,

I know how you feel when you see an accident, you are afraid to look yet you have to.  I understand that  very well.

My son died in 1990 along with his best friend, both dead at the scene.  My son was driving and he fell asleep at the wheel.  They were drving back from Iowa where they had been with other friends and had been up most of the night playing cards.  The other friends were in another car about 1 mile behind them and came on the accident.  He was only 20 miles from home.

My son was into body building, weight lifting and eating healthy......no drugs and no alcohol.  He was a beautiful young man with a heart of gold.

You never get over it but you go on because you have to and I know my Todd would have wanted that for me. I have 3 other wonderful children who did me so proud as they just took over and put together a beautiful funeral for him.  I could hardly move.  But I did as I knew it was the last thing I would ever be able to do for this child.

I do well and spent the rest of my career making sure  no parent was alone when their child lay in our ER.  I was always making sure the parents knew what was happening in the trauma room..........and I won the right to bring parents into the trauma room when their child was being resuscitated so they could see how hard everyone was working on their child and also so they could be with their child.  I had to promise to stay with them and I did.

OK, well I rambled............but hey if there is nothing else you can do for an accident victim but hold their hand, you have done a tremendous thing..........you gave them comfort.

Love you all

Kitt


harlan
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 6/14/2008 8:25 PM (GMT -7)   
My heart goes out to you, Kitt....

percycat
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 1952
   Posted 6/15/2008 11:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Kitt,

I am so sorry that Todd was killed so young and for all the pain and grief you must have gone through. It's remarkable that you took that horrible loss and turned it into something that I'm sure has been good for many, many other parents out there. I'm sure Todd would be very proud of you.

Love,
percycat
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