depersonalisation

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jostar
New Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 8/28/2008 4:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone
 
I have dp and have so on and off since the age of 15 after having surgery.
 
I recently have had a bad bout of this and symptoms include
tinnitus
feeling of unreality
Present feels like distant pass e.g the other day i was in town with my hubby and 2 kids i went to one shop with my son and my hubby took our daughter but less than a couple of minutes after leaving my hubby i could not for the life of me remember if he had my daughter with him i instantly felt sick and panicky
Poor memory/concentration, struggle to follow conversation etc
emotionally/physically numb
fatigue
headaches
de ja vu feelings
unable to focus properly find it difficult to read etc
staring spells
off balanced feeling
 
These are the main symptoms but i feel completely in my own world if feels horrendous this is the worst period of dp ive ever been through and it is extremely hard to cope day in day out with it can anyone relate to the above symptoms ive mentioned above??
 
The only relief i get from this is to go to bed to sleep  i have it 24 7 with no let up i hope that in time it will subside again.
 
I always think that i have a serious illness such as a brain tumor this is because to feel this horrendous and it not been something seriously wrong feels very odd how can you feel so bad and it be just a form of anxiety i dont understand it.  I wouldnt wish my worst enemy to feel this way when you try to explain to others they just look at you as though youre going mad you cant explain it unless you have been through it this forum is great support and help to others everyone take care you will get through it you just have to stick with it take a day at a time it will pass xx
 
 

Post Edited (jostar) : 8/28/2008 6:52:33 AM (GMT-6)


Here Kitty, Kitty, Kitty
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 85
   Posted 8/28/2008 5:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi jostar,

What kind of surgery did you have at age 15?
Also, is there a possibility you may have a long-running inner ear infection? It would
explain the off-balanced feeling and many of the symptoms up there. Are you on
any medication? Medication can cause all of that stuff you wrote - I know this
from experience from about 5, 6 years ago - every single one of your symptoms.
Be kind to yourself,

Juile

jostar
New Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 8/28/2008 5:58 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Julie

Thank you for your quick response i had a hip operation when i was younger and i do put that down to them giving me too much aneasthetic i just could come round from it couple of days later the dp set in, although at the time i didnt know what the hell was happening.

My doc thinks im depressed and ive been on citalopram 30mg for 18 months although i did try to come off it but was feeling real bad again so went back to 30mg the meds have helped me with anxiety but the anxiety is only there because of the dp.

Not sure about the ear thing maybe a possibility thanks for your reply

jodie

 


peacesoul
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 2446
   Posted 8/28/2008 10:58 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi and welcome to HW.
I also have horrible tinnitus and some of the other symtoms you're talking about.
Please don't worry about a brain tumor bcause developing an actual brain tumor is more rare than winnin a lottery.

Your symptoms can be caused by many different things. Have you ever had a full blood work up? Have you ever had an MRI?
What tests has your dr done to rule out other issues?
Moderator - Anxiety-panic forum
 
where we take it one panic attack at a time
 
 
 
The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong in the broken places


jostar
New Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 8/28/2008 12:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Peacesoul
 
Yes ive had mri full bloods etc i think its just anxiety its just hard to get your head around when you feel so bad.  I think that their must be something seriously wrong why do i feel so ill with it all but deep down the most disturbing issue is the depersonalisation as thats chronic at the moment i get no relief at all only when i go to sleep and more often than not im in bed early most nights to escape this horrendous condition.  Thanks for the reply
Jodie

nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 8/28/2008 8:20 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Jodes,

I used to experience depersonalisation a few years ago and it was related to my anxiety/panic attacks. I found it was worse if I had caffienne in my system.

I am sorry that the only relief you are getting is through sleep. Nobody deserves to live like that. shakehead  

I guess the only advice I can suggest is to be as proactive as you can be in your fight against anxiety and depression (and it sounds like you are certainly doing that - one day at a time).

I only had the really bad depersonalisation at the peak of my anxiety and it went away completely when my symptoms settled down. Take heart, this is probably only temporary. Hang in there, be gentle with yourself and if it continues to distress you, please talk to your doctor about it. You should not be living with this every day.

Hugs,

Meg


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


ddd
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 8/29/2008 6:56 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi I am new here an I read your post jostar, and I have been searching to find someone that feels like I do... Of course I have been diagnose BP but I really feel as though anxiety is destroying my life. I totally get your dpersonalization although until recently I hadn't even realized it existed. I feel more days than not totally out of my own body, I stumble and feel unbalanced all of the time to the point where I don't work and hardly leave the house anymore. It is scary and I get racing horrendous thoughts really bad on days when its worse than others. Its a nearly every day all day experience for me and has spun me into a major agitated depression and is quickly becoming unbearable. I have totally isolated myself from people and any kind of social life due to the fact that I constantly feel not me and an impending sense of doom and almost like im not even alive but Im not sure where I go. i sit and just stare and it feels like often there's not any thoughts or theyre so fast and fuzzy that it just makes me almost catatonic. I know my bf i getting fed up I mean how do you deal with people like us??? How can anyone possibly understand that hasn't experienced it? I am having a terrible time getting in to a doc and I have no meds left other than some cymbalta which seems to be making me just feel more gone .... I try to exercise when I can but often I will have panic attacks once I start that im having a heart attack. Its so unbelievably ridiculous yet its real and it's happening all day and is destroying my life as well as yours.... What do doctors do for depersonalization and do you think this sounds like it and could it be triggered by major life events? Only as of the past year have I really experienced what seems to be depersonalization. What is the deal with it?

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 8/29/2008 7:59 AM (GMT -7)   
jostar
 
Good Morning and welcome to HealingWell.  I am Kitt. I am sorry to read how much this issue is interferring with your life.
 
I know we have a few members here that have experienced what you are going through.  From what I know of this disorder therapy is one way to learn to deal with the sx and feelings.
 
I am glad you found us and hope that we will be able to  provide you with help and support.

Again, Welcome.
Kitt
 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


jostar
New Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 8/29/2008 12:27 PM (GMT -7)   
hi ddd
therapy is one way to go ive been on meds from the docs been on citalopram 30mg for 18 months and that has done wonders to settle most of my anxiety symptoms including racing thoughts nightmares all anxiety symptoms that you can think of i went through it. This took a good year on meds patience trying to become more active and fill your day with things to do being positive aswell. This recent bout of dp just hit me from nowhere i dont really know why ive been diagnosed recently with sinusitis maybe thats it i dont know. I too try to explain this feeling to my family etc but they just dont have a clue the only ones who have had their own personal experience with it fully understands you thats why these websites i feel are so helpful. DP is defo linked with anxiety no doubt about it ive had it from being around 15 years old but this is the worst ive had it ive also had alot of stress past 18 months to and that also can contribute to all this i fully understand what you are going through ive been there but believe me their is light at the end of the tunnel you just need to take a day at a time patience and be strong its not easy but you will get there just give it time 
Take care jostar

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 8/29/2008 12:48 PM (GMT -7)   
FYI for others reading this thread, depersonalization disorder is one of a group of conditions called dissociative disorders. Dissociative disorders are mental illnesses that involve disruptions or breakdowns of memory, consciousness or awareness, identity and/or perception—mental functions that normally operate smoothly. When one or more of these functions is disrupted, symptoms can result. These symptoms can interfere with a person’s general functioning, including social and work activities, and relationships.
 
Therapy is considered the choice of  treatment. CBT therapy is high on the list of one therapy that helps with the disorder.
 
Hope you have a therapist jostar. wink
 
Kitt
 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

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