Hello, this is Kitt. My best advice would be to slow down and not fixate so much on your fear of freaking out. IMHO meeting someone you talk to online is not the best way for you to get into a relationship. If your dating now and your happy then just go slow and do not start the "stinkin Thinkin", "the what ifs". There are many chances we take in life and when it comes time you will take a chance but only when your ready.
Have you seen a therapist for your anxiety?
Hugs to you
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression& GERD Forums*~*
I'm sorry to read you were subjected to Abuse.He's not a Man he is a $&*(%^$#!The last Guy I was involved (engaged) was emotionally Abusive.If I had stayed,I truly believe it would have turned physical.Men have deeply hurt me to the point I decided to stay single.Saying this,I selected a Friend to be the Father of my Baby (s).I simply won't tolerate a Man's Abuse,insensitivity or crap any longer..neither should you or other Women.
I had a verbally abusive stepmother and I believed what she told me.
She would call me, stupid, fat, my father's "brat". She made me wear clothes I hated and she thought nothing of saying I ate like a pig in front of relatives, on Thanksgiving. She became my stepmother when I was 5. She could not wait until I moved out.
I got married at 17 years old after I graduated from High School. My self esteem was low and I eventually divorced my first husband. I have been through therapy and my therapist said I was like a daughter without a Mother.
I have learned to leave my childhood in the past. It is over and now I live in the present moment. I learned to know I have done good things but I still have trust issues and when something happens I feel like I knew it would end that way.
Trusting your therapist with your inner thoughts is difficult but just do it. The tears came as I cried for the childhood I had missed out on but now I let go and accept each day as it comes.
I will be here to support you and comfort you when you need me.