feeling so alone...panic is taking over my life.

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Jillene
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 9/20/2008 4:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone,
I just joined this group and not quite sure how everything works. I guess I just feel alone tonight and need someone to talk to. I've suffered from mild panic disorders since I was about 13 years old. In the past 6 months or so they have gotten worse. Worse to the point where I am even scared to go out with a group of friends because I am afraid I will have to leave due to panic. My boyfriend does not understand and gets mad at me when i have to leave somewhere. ive tried explaining how i feel to him but he just doesnt get it. we just got in a big fight tonight about it and now im all alone because none of my friends are available to hang out with...and i just feel so sad. i talked to my doctor about this at my last appt. and she gave me some books to read until my follow-up appt. i almost feel like since ive started reading the books, im getting worse. is this normal? i just need to hear some stories from people who are feeling better.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/20/2008 4:59 PM (GMT -7)   

Jilene,

I have had Anxiety and Depression for 24 years and I can honestly say that for most of those years I did very well on my meds. I would feel the anxiety but I was able to control it until one day it all crashed down on me.  I spent a long time in therapy and working through my anxiety with my husband's support.

There were times when he would throw up his hands and say I don't know what to do for you.  Then I felt worse as I did not want to make his life miserable but he always came back to me and said not to worry he would take care of me.  And he did.  He drove me to the therapist uptown. He was a rock.

I did get better but I still see my Pdoc monthly.  I did get past the anxiety and started to travel again, even on my own.  Our son is in Oregon and I flew out there alone and stayed for a week in a hotel and had each one of the kids spend a night with me.  So I am out doing things.  I know the anxiety can rear it's ugly head but I will not live with anxiety ruling my life. So I kick the old anxiety to the curb and keep on going.

Do I have bad days?  Yes, some days I wake up in tears and I don't know why but I just get up and dressed and get on with my life.

I don'tknow why I was the one blessed with the anxiety but I am strong and I will always make it through.

Bless you and keep posting.

Gentle Hugs

Kitt

 


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


machelle
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 9/21/2008 8:15 PM (GMT -7)   
i do this too, but i know in some cases that i have too, but i try to keep a low profile, i have shaking issues all over so that made me super scared to go out, i do limit myself to activitys i feel safe at still, no one really understands unless its them, thats whats bad they think you can control it and you can't, i have gotten better in town i made myself go out in public , i guess i am getting better, but i understand you and so does everyone on here, but i here if you ever need to talk. smilewinkgrin

fara21
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 8
   Posted 9/22/2008 1:50 AM (GMT -7)   
hi there..
i had bad anxiety,id feel like i was going to die & sumthing awful was going to happen..felt like screaming..
just had to hide in a room/toilet n cry..
it wud go away by itself..
i had suffered hyperthyroid n had an operation..since then its been ok..
 
actuali,there realli is nothing wrong with u..u r ok..its sumting thats causing the panic attacks.
i hope u have blood tests or sumthing to find out..
 

bigcc_1976
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 94
   Posted 9/22/2008 4:12 PM (GMT -7)   
Jilene,

Many if not all of use here in Healing Well experience anxiety and PA's. However, we all have different reasons why and how the anxiety effects us. For me I suffer from health anxiety. My mind starts thinking I am having a heart attack when all it really is is anxiety.

My family also does not understand, what I go through on a daily basis nor do they try. Just keep up with us here on this forum, we are here to listen and share our concerns and of course our good days as well.

CC

Jillene
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 9/23/2008 7:25 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement. I really appreciate it. Just to hear that people understand does me a world of good, as it seems no one around me understands what I'm going through.
fara21: yes, I had some blood tests done to check my thyroid and my B12 and I have a follow-up appt. with my doctor at the beginning of october...she wanted to make sure that my anxiety wasn't caused by some underlying condition.
bigcc_1976: it really does interest me how many different forms of anxiety there are - i don't know what one would call my type, but what I'm scared of is throwing up. I'm always afraid that when I have a panic attack that I'm going to throw up...which is why I avoid public places sometimes because I start to think "what if I'm going to be sick?". Then, all that thinking about getting sick makes me actually start to feel sick - its this terrible cycle.
machelle: i know what you are talking about with the shaking...its so embarrassing when that happens in public because people don't understand. I'm so glad you have gotten better with going out and about - that's my goal!!

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/23/2008 2:17 PM (GMT -7)   

Jilene,

I hope you are having a good day.  I have a fear of people noticing my hand tremors.  Someone always says " What are you so nervous about?"

Boy if I only new I would drop kick it to the curb.  I am afraid people will look at me and think I am a basket case................and sometimes they are right. shocked

Other days I can conquer the world.  So stick with us sweetie, We know what your going through.

Hugs
Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

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