I feel like I can't take it anymore..

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greydays
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 46
   Posted 10/7/2008 6:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Its been a long time since I have posted here so bare with me.  about 3 years ago I started having horrible anxiety and panic attacks.  Of course the first 10 times or so I rushed to the ER and was completly certain that I was dying.  Of course my doctor said it was anxiety and put me on zoloft (50mgs).  After a month or so on the medication I was feeling back to my old self again, sometimes I would have mild anxiety but no attacks whatso ever.  about 2 months ago I got to confident and starting to forget to take my medication, then I ran out and waited about a week or so to get it refilled.  WHAT A MISTAKE.  For the last 2 months I have been living in complete fear.  I am totally consumed by anxiety again from the moment I wake up to the moment I lay down.  I have been having panic attacks that sometimes last for a couple of hours, and when I am not having one, I am already dreading the next one.  I am back on the Zoloft and my doctor has given me Ativan.  I have a phobia of medications so I have yet to be able to get the courage to take the Ativan. It has gotten so bad that I carry a cotton belt in my purse so if I ever have an attack that is so bad that I can't take it. I don't know what to do and no one seems to understand.  I am not strong enough to deal with this. 

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/7/2008 6:34 AM (GMT -7)   

Dear greydays

Hello and I am sorry for what you are going through.  I think you did as many do that are on meds, you felt good so you forgot to take meds and went pretty much cold turkey off your med.  Your physician put you back on the med and added one, Ativan, to help you until the Zoloft gets back to therapeutic level.

You have the Ativan so IMHO  I would use it.  You should only need it short term and if you are unable to function then I would suggest using  the med.

You said you have been to the ER 10 times or so in the past, you don't want to go there again just to find out what you know. Give yourself permission to use the meds.

Have you ever been to therapy to learn other ways to cope with anxiety?

I am glad you felt comfortable coming back to our forum.

Keep talking to us.
Kitt



 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
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Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


peacesoul
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 2446
   Posted 10/7/2008 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi and I am so sorry for your situation. I have suffered (and still do to some extent) horrible anxiety
You are strong enough to deal with this, you've just not be shown how to deal with it.

Your case is a classic example of how meds just mask the real issues. The Dr in the ER should have suggested you seek therapy to figure out the cause of your anxiety and not just mask it with meds.
Now you're off the meds (which was your crutch) and you're back to square one. Meds are a temp. solution to an ongoing problem

Anxiety is not on illness nor is it a disease, it's a symtom of a deeper issues, An issue that can only be solved when you find out the cause.
The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong in the broken places


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/7/2008 1:10 PM (GMT -7)   

Anxiety disorders are the most common form of mental disturbance in the United States population.

DSM-IV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders ) defines 12 types of anxiety disorders in the adult population. They can be grouped under seven headings:

Panic disorders with or without agoraphobia.

Phobias. These include specific phobias and social phobia.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

Stress disorders. These include post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and acute stress disorder.

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD).

Anxiety disorders due to known physical causes. These include general medical conditions or substance abuse.

Anxiety disorder not otherwise specified. This last category is not a separate type of disorder, but is included to cover symptoms that do not meet the specific DSM-IV criteria for other anxiety disorders.

All DSM-IV anxiety disorder diagnoses include a criterion of severity. The anxiety must be severe enough to interfere significantly with the patient's occupational or educational functioning, social activities or close relationships, and other customary activities. Reference: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders

FYI.  I have had anxiety for 24 plus years and I have done both medication and therapy and exercise.

Take care everyone.

Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/7/2008 1:51 PM (GMT -7)   
HI
I am going to chime in here as well
I have a/P for 30 plus yrs and I was never on nor would take AD's

Once I had to sell my Retirement home I crashed down full force and was put on Zoloft
I was on too high a dose but IT DID work at proper dose for ME

So again I got to not being on them and I have lost both parents and my daughter's bio dad plus my GMA and aunt in 5 yrs /dad n Mom and aunt in last 2
I have dealt with the worries of chemo...the sickness my teen daughter HAD to watch me go thru
Recently an operation for the Cancer in my lung..........


I LITERALLY was saved by support and using techniques as well as I WANTED to be on an AD
I am on Celexa plus I take ativan only if needed
Valium daily

NO theses are NOT crutches to me
I have a few CHRONIC illnesses that require meds
Do I not take meds for them
 I am 54
I want to live a full of a LIFE as I possibly can
and it means everything to me
I have faced my own mortality
I want to live and see 55 ya know

THIS is not a crutch IMHO

If your doc gave you those meds follow his or her directions to the letter.........My opinion

Most of us do not produce enough of chemicals needed to fight this
SO I say to selk I want to
Live and if it means I must do it with meds as well as self help techniques
THEN thats gonna be my way

I am glad you have come and shared your story with us
Please do look at the Resources that has a free online CBT and other techniques that go hand in hand with meds
WE will be here for support and help in anything we can .......

Take care and keep us posted


LYN

Great input lil sis..Love Big sis  


  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    

Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 10/7/2008 2:55:31 PM (GMT-6)


Georgie Girl
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 319
   Posted 10/7/2008 2:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh my, Grey Days, you ARE having a rough time of it.  I can so relate as I felt as you do just this spring, thinking I couldn't go on feeling this way.  You have come to the right place for people who have been what you have been through to make suggestions or just listen.  Don't give up.  And please, please take whatever medication a medical professional has prescribed for you.  I find I can't even skip a day or the anxiety starts to come back.  Best of luck to you.
 
Georgie Girl  
Georgie Girl


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/7/2008 2:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks GG for your input

LYN
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    


Marie-Claire
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 900
   Posted 10/7/2008 5:16 PM (GMT -7)   
As a nurse , and as someone who has suffered with PTSD, GAD, DEPRESSION I think that meds are a godsend.... I fought taking meds for my symptoms for years, ; afraid that if I took something it would mean that I was 'weak' and unable to handle things... and also I was afraid that if I took something I would be too sedated to hear my children during the night if they needed me... they both suffer from PTSD etc. also and suffered with horrible nightmares... I needed to be vigilant enough to wake up if they needed me. about 5 years ago... my doctor finally said enough! You either take the meds or I put you in the hospital... While I was thinking I was handling things so well... my body was taking the brunt of my stress.
I also learned that I couldn't begin to deal with the issues that caused the anxiety, panic and depression until I got them under control. Once the meds started working , I was 'well' enough to be able to address some of the problems, issues that led to my anxiety without falling apart. When you are anxious, depressed, in a flight or fight mode... there is no room for reasoning or learning to cope in a constructive way... all you are is anxious... it has control. When you take the meds ( sometimes you only need them for a short time) You are taking that control back... O.K. first we get the anxiety under control , then you are relaxed enough to discuss... talk, figure out healthy ways to cope with your anxiety... then you practice... then when you think you are strong enough and practiced enough... you can start weaning off the meds... because now YOU are in control... if anxiety sneaks up on you... you've got a plan of action!
I think you have taken positive steps already... you've recognized that this is a problem... you've seeked medical help... and now you are posting on HW ... all good and positive steps to regain control of the 'anxiety' monster...
Kuddos for you... keep coming to us for help.. we are here always... therapy is a good idea once you have been on the meds for a little bit... it will mean leaving your comfort zone... it will mean pushing yourself a little ...but you're half way there... keep up the good work. !
HEaling thoughts and prayers to you... come to us often ... we will be thinking and praying for you.
Mary
51 yr.old retired RN,Crohn's D for last35 yrs..severe esophagitis, migraines,strictures,urethral stricture,depression,probable MS.,RLS, arthritis, PTSD ,general anxiety disorder.
 
 


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/7/2008 6:10 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Greydays,

It's lovely to have you back, but I'm sorry for the reason why. You are strong enough to deal with this. We will be here to support you okay. Coming off meds suddenly can give your body and enormous shock and it can take a while for things to get back into balance after that. Be patient with yourself. I used to have med anxiety and I find that reading the side effects is NOT a good thing to do. Can you just take half the dose, or even a quarter to start?

I take Ativan, valium and sometimes xanax as needed, and the Ativan has been a great help for me.

Lyn is right when she says that meds are not a crutch and she is one wise lady who has been through so very, very much and come out sane and strong smilewinkgrin

Let us help you through this, you have been given some great advice. Know you can do it one day at a time. I believe you can.

Hugs,

Meg


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
Weekend Warrior Princess
 


greydays
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 46
   Posted 10/8/2008 10:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all for your responses.  I have just had so many bad days in a row, I would just like a few good ones.  I have made an appointment to start CBT next week.  I still have not been able to bring myself to take the Ativan yet.  I think I would actually have to be slipped one or take on in the doctor's office to make sure nothing happens.  Hopefully this will all end soon....

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/9/2008 9:29 AM (GMT -7)   

greydays

I understand your reluctance to not take the meds.  Whatever you decide to do I support your decision.

Glad your getting into CBT.

Gentle Hugs
Kitt

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