Welcome to HW, I'm really sorry to hear you are going through such a rough time. It's wonderful and admirable that you are looking out for your kids, but don't forget to look after yourself too. In order to have happy healthy children you too need to be healthy. There is absolutley no shame in needing some time to yourself and it sounds to me like you could use that. The black pit of depression is not a place you want to be in.
As Karen mentioned, it's probably best to take your meds only as prescibed, I understand that it makes tough things easier to deal with when they are fuzzier at the edges, but it may not work in your favour in the long run. I split from my husband...5? years ago..my memory isn't that crash hot and it was awful, just awful. I had a drinking problem at the time (and the beer gut to match!!) and my husband would call me obscene names....I had to get out.
IMHO it's not worth staying with someone who doesn't love you. Even for the sake of your children. But that is just my opinion. I would suggest some therapy for both of you. No one deserves to live with depression and you sound like a really sweet guy. Take care, and please stay with us. We are here to support and listen.
Just checking in..how are you doing? Stick with us okay, we understand anxiety and depression here.
Sorry things are so rough for you right now. I'm not going through what you're going through right now but all of us have been through some sort of rough time of it or are going through a rough time now.
You obviously love your children very much and care for your wife. If she wants to stay with you, for whatever reason, I'd say there's hope that you and she can recover the love. I thought at one time I didn't love my husband and when I told him I wanted a separation and didn't love him, he knocked himself out to get us to counseling and we got back on track. That was 24 years ago and we've now been married for 32 years.
You probably need to be on medication, so I am glad you are, but you shouldn't feel overmedicated. Celexa shouldn't make you feel "doped up" but the other medication might. You should talk to your doctor about other medications that will help but won't be as sedating.
Take care of yourself and check in here often. People will be checking to see how you're doing.
You are right Georgie Girl, we will keep checking!
Welcome to HealingWell and the anxiety forum. This is Kitt. I am sorry you are in a bad place right now. I gathered from your post that your wife has depression and you sound like you are depressed too.
We do have a Depression forum that might help you more and please don't be afraid to vent or share as it is sometimes good to just write it all down and receive some feedback with lots of support from the members of HW.
We do have a new members thread, I will pop it to the top for you.
Again a warm welcome.
Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression& GERD Forums*~*
Hey Dave -
At this moment, I'm not feeling the same way as you are....However, I've had those days!
What really has helped me is to get out...get out of the house, do something even whey you don't feel like doing it! No, you probably won't get the same satisfaction as you normally would have, but just getting out for a walk helped me.
My husband was supportive during my hard time at first, but slowly it got old for him and fast.
I began therapy and it too took some time but has helped. A really great workbook that has also helped me is called MIND OVER MOOD. Changing the way you feel by changing the way you think.
I agree w/others, I would not over medicate!!
I know it can be hard waking up w/all of those feelings and wondering how your going to get through the ENTIRE day w/out them. Trust me!! It's not easy, but as you can see, what you're doing now isn't working - right?
I really really recommend that workbook! Also getting out of the house and do more w/your wife. Again, it will all seem very forced at first and maybe not very enjoyable - but what you need is change! You and your wife!
My husband hated the fact that I constanly was "on" something just to get through the day...
I knew I needed to change my ways, not just for him - but because I didn't like the way my life was turning out.
I wanted to go back to the way I was living yrs before. The workbook was not only great for me, but my husband as well.
I still am on an antidepressant, however I only take Ativan on really bad days. And on those days, I don't allow myself to just hang out and think - I'm just going to let the pills do the job for me. Take your meds yes, but cut back, either get into therapy or find some othe way to get out of your head, so you can find relief!
Hope to hear from you!