Kicks and Giggles to Decrease Your Anxiety..........Funtime

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stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/23/2008 10:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey there all Members .....A member asked for a thread to help decrease anxiety......a fun thread.
 
Laughter truly is the best medicine. Tell a joke, share a link, and lets have a laugh!
 
Remember to stay within the guidelines of HealingWell.
 
smhair    smilewinkgrin    devil    turn     tongue     cool     shocked    blush     scool     yeah     smhair
 
So here we go, let us LOL
 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/23/2008 10:50 AM (GMT -7)   

Bumper Stickers:

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

If this sticker is getting smaller, the light is probably green.
 
Caution: I brake for no apparent reason.
 
I respect your opinion, I just don't want to hear it.
 
Be Nice to Your Kids, They'll choose Your Nursing Home.
 
Vehicle made in Japan, but bumper sticker made in USA
 
I owe, I owe, so off to work I go    
 
American Health Plan  Don't Get Sick
 
Bless you all and hope I put a smile on your face.
 
Kitt
 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/23/2008 3:33 PM (GMT -7)   

Halloween Jokes:

Doctor, doctor, I'm so ugly. What can I do about it? Hire yourself out for Halloween parties.  cool
 
One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes. She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, "what are you supposed to say sweetheart?" The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or Tweat!"
 
The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead honey say it just one more time." Once again the little Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!" The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag. The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says, "Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my  cookies!"
 
Look out for those angels.............LOL  turn    turn     turn

 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/23/2008 6:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Kitt,
Great thread, thanks sweetie. I'll have to go get my old joke book out of the back shed. I hope there are no spider hiding on top of it smhair
Join in everyone..it's time for a good belly laugh!
Megs
Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/23/2008 10:43 PM (GMT -7)   

A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.

The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.

She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.

The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"

I'm blonde, so I'm laughing on the inside.....!

Meg


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/24/2008 3:15 AM (GMT -7)   
LOl loving the bumper stickers guy at work has this on his car

Squirrels ... Natures Little Speed Bumps.

Love Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
 


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/24/2008 5:48 AM (GMT -7)   
http://www.trevorvanmeter.com/flyguy/
 
a little fun game if any1s really bored it made me giggle. :P
 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/24/2008 6:47 AM (GMT -7)   

badfish

That was to funny.  Easy to play and sure makes you laugh.

Your the best.

Kitt


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/24/2008 3:43 PM (GMT -7)   
OMG
Thanks
I really NEEDED these today
Had rough night
'Have a thumb that looks like I smushed it with a dang hammer it is so big ugly painful and swollen

AWWW such is life

Jolly green Giant..me am
Ho Ho HO

Great idear lil sis yeah
Loves Big sis


  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/24/2008 3:51 PM (GMT -7)   

Top 10 reasons why your to old to Trick or Treat.

10. You get winded from knocking on the door.

9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

8. You ask for high fiber candy only. smhair

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

6. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!" and you're not wearing a mask.

5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hairpiece.

2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.

1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

I need to go get some more witches brew..................giggle.


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/25/2008 9:20 AM (GMT -7)   

Jokes about Marriage   devil

 "If you'll make the toast and pour the juice, sweetheart," said the newlywed bride, "breakfast will be ready."
    "Good, what are we having for breakfast," said the new husband.
    "Toast and juice," she replied.
*********************************************************

A husband and wife were shopping when the wife said, "Darling, it's my mother's birthday tomorrow. What shall we buy for her?  She would like something electric."
    The husband replied, "How about a chair?"
*********************************************************

I bought my wife a new car.
She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor."
I said, "Where's the car?"
She said, "In the lake."
smhair   smhair smhair smhair smhair


 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/25/2008 5:18 PM (GMT -7)   
  OMG Lil sis
I am just about piddling me pants here
YOU are just what the doc ordered
well that and the Liqued Morphine lol
 
BTW I have finger that looks like I HIT it with hammer ............
Not that I did
Dang rheumy put 2 needles in ankle and so started my journey of the Pyoderma once again
 
devil   turn  But feeling NO PAIN right now lol
 
  Roflmbo..........
 
I lost my dentures today and was freaking cuz I had to go out
Finally found them ..........but not gonna say on here where......... smilewinkgrin
Loves
Big sis
Lyn
'S.I.S.
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    


Buddha443556
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 293
   Posted 10/25/2008 7:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Ok, I have no jokes but there's something that amuses me.

ALF

Good clean fun.
You must do the things you think you cannot do. -- Eleanor Roosevelt


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/26/2008 10:12 AM (GMT -7)   

 

Got this in an email today I love it had

'to share


MOTHERS                                                                   
                                                                           
Real Mothers don't eat quiche; they don't have time to make it.           
Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox.
                                                                           
Real Mothers often have sticky floors, well used ovens and happy kids.   
Real Mothers know that dried play dough doesn't come out of carpets.     
Real Mothers don't want to know what the vacuum just sucked up.           
Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?' and get their answer when a little   
voice says,  'Because I love you best.'                                   
Real Mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height or years
or grade...                                                               
                                                                           
                                                                           
It is marked by the progression of Mommy to Mom to Mother...             
                                                                           
    The Images of Mother                                                 
                                                                           
    4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!                           
                                                                           
    8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!                     
                                                                           
    12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.     
                                                                           
    14 YEARS OF AGE - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.       
                                                                           
    16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.             
                                                                           
    18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!             
                                                                           
    25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it .       
                                                                           
    35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.         
                                                                           
    45 YEARS OF AGE - Call Mom, she can answer that.                     
                                                                           
                                                                           
    55 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?       
                                                                           
    65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.                 
                                                                           
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she
carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen
from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place     
where love resides. The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but   
true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she
lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, and the beauty of a woman with
passing  years only grows! 
 
Buddha...I love Alf too            turn   
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/26/2008 10:15 AM (GMT -7)   
I am soooo glad you did this thread
'WE do need laughter to get thru all the stuff we do go thru

Great thread.........Loves big sis

Great Jokes and all ....

Luvs
S.I.S.
Lyn
ROO
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
               Look For The GOOD,Even At Your Lowest
 
     Listen To Your Heart,Look Inside Yourself,Understand You
 
 
 
                    


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/28/2008 3:48 PM (GMT -7)   
Need more kicks n Giggles

Luvs to all

Lyn
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
    We Have Anxiety / Panic ..Anxiety / Panic DO NOT have US 
 You have To Have Some Laughter as Well as Those Tears IMHO         
 
    
 
 
 
                    


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/28/2008 6:33 PM (GMT -7)   

Children's Books that didn't make it

  1. You Are Different and That's Bad
  2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
  3. Dad's New Wife Robert
  4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share
  5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book
  6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
  7. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
  8. All Cats Go to Hades
  9. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
  10. Some Kittens Can Fly
  11. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption
  12. Grandpa Gets a Casket
  13. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator  
  14. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
  15. Strangers Have the Best Candy
  16. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way
  17. You Were an Accident
  18. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
  19. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games
  20. Your Nightmares Are Real
  21. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?
  22. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
  23. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
  24. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
turn   cool I can think of a few more...but I'm just too polite to say it!!
Meg

oops I missed the green ham one..deleted!!

Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 

Post Edited (nervymeg) : 10/28/2008 10:16:48 PM (GMT-6)


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/28/2008 9:13 PM (GMT -7)   

I love Alf............

Big Sis, the Mother one was great. Thanks for posting that one.

Megs your mind wanders to the dark side with mine sometimes.....nice to have you with me.......... turn

Hugs,

The Witch of the Midwest


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/28/2008 9:18 PM (GMT -7)   

Me? Dark? Nah, just a little evil!! devil

Hugs,

The wicked fairy of the south,

Megs


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/28/2008 9:30 PM (GMT -7)   

Small Town Cops

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."

"Quiet!" snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back."

"But, officer, I just wanted to say,"

"And I said be quiet! You're going to jail!"

A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you, the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

"Don't count on it," answered the guy in the cell. "I'm the groom."

************************************************
The Pope On Tour

The Pope has just finished a tour of Napa Valley and is taking a limousine to San Francisco. Having never driven a limo, the Pope asks the chauffeur if he might drive for a while. Well, the chauffeur doesn't have much choice, so he climbs in the back of the limo and the Pope takes the wheel.

The Pope proceeds down Silverado, and starts accelerating to see what the limo can do. He gets to about 90 mph, and suddenly he sees the red and blue lights of a CHP cruiser in his mirror. He pulls over and the trooper comes to his window.

The trooper, seeing who it is, says, "Just a moment please, I need to call in."

The trooper calls in and asks for the Chief. He tells the Chief that he's got a REALLY important person pulled over, and asks how to handle it.

"It's not Ted Kennedy again, is it?" asks the Chief.

"No Sir!" replies the trooper, "This guy's more important."

"Is it the governor?"

"No! Even more important!"

"Is it the PRESIDENT?"

"No! Even more important!"

"Well, WHO THE HECK is it?" screams the Chief.

"I don't know, Sir," replies the trooper, "But he's got the Pope as his chauffeur!
 
God Bless and Good Night.
Kitt
 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/29/2008 4:22 AM (GMT -7)   
LOl kitt cracked me up,

Megs I loved dads new wife robert :P

Keep em comin ppl
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/30/2008 9:08 AM (GMT -7)   
OMG
I am soooooooo glad I read theses
I am LOL and trying to hold me piddle
by crossing legs
Not gonna work too much longer

Great ones for sure

Megs.....The dark side EH
Luvs
Sis in Sobriety

Lil sis
You are da cracker for sure
Loves
Big sis

I like the Mother one too
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety/Panic,Fibro & Other DD
                                    Donate at  www.healingwell.com
 
Moderator @ Alzheimer's,Co Mod @ Anxiety/ Panic,Co Mod @ Crohns 
 
                                    FIGHT the FIGHT with all YOU HAVE
    We Have Anxiety / Panic ..Anxiety / Panic DO NOT have US 
 You have To Have Some Laughter as Well as Those Tears IMHO         
 
    
 
 
 
                    


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/30/2008 9:55 PM (GMT -7)   

A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half.

Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet.

The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient replied, "Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?"

The doctor inquired of Patient #1 what Patient #2 was doing. Patient #1 replied, "Oh. He's my friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a light bulb."

The doctor looks up and notices Patient #2's face is going all red.

The doctor asks Patient #1, "If he's your friend, you should get him down from there before he hurts himself"

Patient #1 replies, "What? And work in the dark?"

turn  I think I would fit in at that hospital just fine!
Lyn - Nothing sweet about me!
S.i.s,
Meg
Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 


behindtheseeyes00987
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 191
   Posted 10/30/2008 10:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh Man,
I don't have any good ones yet but you guys are hilarious! i loved these!
-Depressed-
 
"Tell them to look up. Tell them to remember the stars."
 
 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/31/2008 11:14 AM (GMT -7)   

Halloween Today

The door bell, rings, and a man answers it.

Here stands this plain but well dressed kid, saying "Trick or Treat!"

The man asks the kids what he's dressed up like for Halloween.

The kid says, "I'm an IRS agent." Then he takes 28% of the man's candy, leaves, and doesn't say Thank You.
_________________________________________________
Tiny Dracula
 
Two nuns are traveling through Europe in their car.

They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light.

Suddenly, a diminutive Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and scratches at the windshield!

"Quick, quick!!" shouts the first nun "What shall I do?"

"Turn the windshield wipers on, that will get rid of the abomination." shouts the second.

The first nun switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and hisses even more loudly!

"What shall I do now?" shouts the first nun.

"Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water at the Vatican!" says the second.

Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and hisses again at the nuns.

"Now what?" screams the first nun. "Show him your cross!" says the second.

So the nun rolls down the window and shouts:

"GET OFF MY DARN HOOD, YOU LITTLE CREEP!"

Hint:  She is cross skull devil smhair smilewinkgrin like ticked off  ROFLMBO

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