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badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/26/2008 3:24 PM (GMT -7)   
this week end has been terrible for the really annoying on edge all te time feeling. It all started when my housemate (Sam) had a go at me bout doing the washing up, she was alittle out of order becoause i only live here at the wkend so none of it was mine. This really annoyed me I had just come back from work in London spent 2hours on train and came home to that.
 
Neways I did the washing up, instead of thank you i got a load of flippant comments. Now annoyed even more i went out down the pub with my other housemate James. I vented alot told her how she much annoyed me, none the less an anxiety attacked followed and i went home earlyto go spend a restless tossing and turning in my bed wondering how to handle the situation.
 
Tired and still annoyed i got up the next morning to go local shop and buy some herbal anxiety relief, thy had it but couldn't sell it to me coz they didn't kno wht price it was. Really irriating. As you can see my wkend has been full annoying litttle things too many to mention, Ive hadn't had chacne to relax or sleep im quite stressed n i got work tomoz morn which wil jus stress me more. i found out Sam heard me joking around with my female friend saying the house was a mess coz Sam had been slacking in her cleaning duties that why she was annoyed at me and had ago at me.
 
So what do i do now jus wait for things to die down or go talk to Sam. If i go talk to her wht do i say and should I apoligise. Dnt think i'l b able to stop thinking bout this responses v.welcome.
 
An anxious Badfish smurf
 


nervymeg
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 10/26/2008 3:40 PM (GMT -7)   

Ah Flatmates!!

They can ruin your day. I would have a talk to Sam and clear the air. Don't use accusatory tones or blaming/shaming, use those old "I feel" statements. If you let negative vibes fester around the flat then it will come to a head eventually and could result in you both saying things you wish you hadn't! I've had some knock down drag out fights with flat mates in the past and it ain't pretty. Especially when you wonder why there are green floaties in your milk the next morning. smhair

Show Sam that you are mature and in control. Most likely she is doing this out of her own guilt issues. Let us know how it goes my friend.

Meg


Co-moderator Anxiety/Panic
Panic Attack Survivor
 


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/28/2008 6:32 AM (GMT -7)   

Well my wkend got alot longer.

Pulled a sickie on monday, took a sedative (like Seredyn) on the Sunday to calm me down it worked but made me extremely drowsy so much tht i was way too tired to go to work on Mon.

Neways mon nite rolls by n I see Sam she apoligies for having ago at me and says the state of the house is really getting her down and she beginning to hate living ther. I got every1 together and told them how Sam was feeling and we all agreed things need to change. Ive become OCD bout the washing up and cant have even one plate in the sink. So im definetly doing my bit.

Neways out in the pub talking to all my housemates when my ex shows up wiv her group of friends and her current BF. I hadn't seen her with another since we broke up, i knew she was seeing bt to actually see them together was weird. Especially as the group of friends sat on table next to me so tht my ex and BF wer sitting directly behind me. He had his arm round her and it was sort of touching me and same, it was just plain weird. After bout 10mins of this and her saying I hope ur too drunk wen we get back to mine. I turned round and talked to them both saying isn't this really weird for u this whole situation a brief conversation followed. Her new bf obv disturbed by my unorthodox attitude was very argumentative to everthing I said. I let it go tho and after another 10mins left the weird situation and even hey it nice meeting u to her BF in a sarcastic way. It doesn't bother she seeing some1 it doesn't bother tht im going to have to watch her with another guy i jus dontwant my nose rubbed in it. I nearly stormed off tht night but decided i wasn't letting ruin my quiet evening out.

I want too stress it wasn't her fault she sat behind the group of friends chose wher to sit when she was in the toilet. I also want to stress this was the first tme i had actully seen her with any1. This is the thing considering her BF was trying to wind me up i feel i handled the situation as best i could, Im realy pleased ok alot of ppl think im really weird bt it was my only way of handling it. I glad i didn't stress out or have an anxiety or start a fight with a wall on the way home. Old me would have done. I have to admit i have been having compulsive thoughts about the whole situation and it is now making me anxious i realy cant get it out my head and feel if im not careful a full on anxiety episode is round the corner.

Needed to vent realy, sorry for long post

Badfish smurf


 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/28/2008 6:42 AM (GMT -7)   

Good Morning Badfish,

I know you say it does not bother you but you posted a lot about something that does not bother you.  Next time you see she is in the same establishment that you are why don't you choose to go somewhere else until it truly doesn't bother you. Keep working on letting go of this ex gf.

Take care

Kitt


badfish
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 10/28/2008 6:56 AM (GMT -7)   
Lol kitt you seen rite thru me.

It doesn't me bother me her seeing ppl, im seeing other ppl. I obviously stil have feelings for her it just one of those things. It does get to me that she says Im some1 she stil cares about as a friend when she can treat me alittle inconsideratly at times. I think it will always be alittle weird between us. I beginning to feel that seeing her with other ppl will make let go of her, i cant explain v.well but hte more im around her the more i dont wan2 be around her if u no what i mean.

I wont run from this, jus to go home sit alone and have an anxiety attack like i used too. Im gonna go out ther and have good time inspite of everything show her i have moved on. As soon as meet someone else she wont bother me anymore.

Thats just the way I feel Skitt and ok ther will be times wen i miss her but i jus got to ride them not run from them.

Badfish
 

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