Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression& GERD Forums*~*
Post Edited (Green Grove) : 12/27/2008 1:04:05 AM (GMT-7)
id be angry- the behaviour of your niece was short sighted and selfish. Your sister deserves to enjoy the simple things while she endures such a complex illness. it would have boosted her spirit so much to see the tree & trimmings- a bit of a healing balm for the soul, and your niece robbed her of that.
I believe you can show her a beautiful home christmas next year. Prayers are with you and Beverly.
Always, Maz XX
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. No one said the world was fair but it makes me feel so helpless as I would have gone out to ND and that tree would have been up.
I will be ok, but I am very protective of my sister right now as she has lived her life going without and giving to others she deserved to have a tree. I worry that these kinds of disappointments kick her into depression and she loses hope and her dreams.
I will not let that happen. I will be glad when she gets back her on the 5th and away from the toxic people that are all about material things and having a good time.
Whoa.............the French/Norwegian lady has a temper and I do reign it in as I know my sister never wants a fuss in the family.
I get so mad I cry as my hands are tied.
You have every right to be angry. I would be too. Your expectations for what you wanted for your sister Bev were so high and then you came crashing down when you found out that what Bev had been wanting to see wasn't there. Some people just don't understand the simple pleasures of the season like seeing the tree lit up.
Is there any way you can recreate the scene that should have been in North Dakota at your home for your sister to see and experience when she arrives back with you? I know it wouldn't be quite the same as what she should have had in North Dakota but would it mean something to Bev to see it in your home. Is the "better late than never" applicable here? I know if I found out something like this, I would try to do my best to make sure that she had something special when she got back to my area.
I hope you can find it in your heart to let go of the anger (though you do deserve to be angry) and to try to focus on what you can do for yourself to get past the anger and what you can do to make things special for Bev but also remember you can't do it all. I'm one of those kind of people who holds onto my anger and just hangs onto it and my Mom often says the only person it is hurting is me.
Gentle Huggles to you Kitt.
Anxiety 2007; IBS 2004; Chronic Hives 2002. Medications: Allegra, Zantac, Xanax, Darvocet.
Thank you all. My daughter has a 10' tall gorgeous tree and perhaps she will leave hers up and we can do a mini Christmas tea or something special when my sister gets back.
I do not know yet what date her surgery will be but she is adamant that I am there and don't leave her alone, I will be there.
When I feel angry it triggers so many past injustices and that fuels the fire. Diane, you are right ......I need to let it go. I am the one who is unhappy and the people such as this great niece are going about their merry way.
I am working on CBT.
Thank you my friends.
Keep us posted on Beverly's condition, i believe she is a fighter and with you at her side she is doubly strong. and remember Kitt, while you are coming off cymbalta, all your pain is magnified. make time for yourself. if you need to wallow, then by gosh, you do it! i jeep you and Bev in my prayer list and offer up a prayer every day,
much love to you my precious friend- you wouldnt be human if you accepted what your niece did and just let it slide- you have every right to feel cheated and hurt.