It sounds like the sun has gone behind the clouds for you. Take some deep breaths and don't let your current situation overwhelm you. If your husband isn't treating you the way you feel you deserve then you need to pick a good time to sit down and talk it through with him. When we feel unloved and under-appreciated then everything becomes so much worse and we feel "unstable" and insecure.
This could be why you feel everything is crashing down upon you right now sweetie. Try and tackle these issues one at a time..as I said, it's easy to get overwhelmed. maybe you could suggest that you and your husband have one night together that's just for you. It doesn't have to mean going out or spending money..it could be a nice home cooked meal..or a DVD on the couch.
You deserve much love and respect. Don't settle for anything less my friend.
You are SO worthy of love. Don't let that insecurity take over okay? You are a beautiful and caring wife and mother and you do not deserve to be treated this way. If you honestly aren't getting any support from him and you are serious about changing this bad situation you may need to consider the option of leaving.
I don't mean to be overly dramatic..and I'm sure it seems overwhelming to even consider leaving with all that is going on, I'm just saying that you may want to think about it if things don't improve. No-one deserves to live with uncertainty or to be made to feel unnattractive and worthless.
You deserve more sweetie. Fight for it.
I'm glad that you have considered leaving..it means you have some kahoonas and are ready to fight! Maybe your intent to leave may be what he needs to get his act together, but I would expect big changes from him and many apologies. Don't let him beg off.
If you are the one who does the leaving I'm sure your kids won't see you as the bad guy, they are most likely sensitive to the tension and will respect you for making such a brave decision.
Best of luck with whatever happens, Hugs,
Co-Moderator, Anxiety and Panic Forum