Anxiety About New Doc..

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Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 60
   Posted 3/19/2009 9:28 AM (GMT -6)   
Good Morning Family,
I have an appointment in 2 hours w/ a new doctor and I am beside myself with anxiety. I haven't been to a pdoc in about 4 years because as some of you might remember, I decided to fire the last one after he wouldn't listen and just wanted to keep increasing my SSRI. Since then, I've been trying to deal with the anxiety on my own, and occasionally my grandmom would give me a few of her 0.5 mg xanax when things got really bad.
Well, I guess I have finally reached a breaking point, because I called a few weeks ago to make an appointment with a doctor to try and get on a therapeutic regimen to help lessen and manage my anxiety more effectively. Now I sit here typing, and my head feels swimmy, my heart is beating like crazy, and I have the worst feeling in my stomach. I don't like doctors, and don't trust them as I feel they are only out to push drugs on their patients, and not to mention getting perks from the various drug reps that constantly stroll through their offices....
I am so mad at myself b/c I waited until last minute to post this concern here. I was going to post yesterday, but with all the drama from the Nikki/Garen incident I just thought that it was better to I'm posting as more of a vent/self-talk than anything since my appointment is so near...UGH.
My anxiety has been REALLY REALLY bad this week. I usually have good days and bad (like we all do), but everyday this week has been BAD. I'm so stressed out and busy, I feel like things are never going to get any better. As some of you know, my grandmom was diagnosed with lung cancer around mid-February...and my mom and I were gearing up to help her w/things as she underwent chemo, however, she passed away on March 9, due to complications from the cancer. It was like we got her diagnosis and 12 days later she was gone....I still can't believe it's real and I don't think I've been able to completely grieve...I just have this huge EMPTY feeling, and I don't know how to get rid of it. In light of everything that's been going on, maybe it's a good thing i've got an appointment today, if I can just make myself get in my car and drive there and not run away before I see the doctor....I wish all of you were here to stand behind me and see to it that I walk through that door. 

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 14995
   Posted 3/19/2009 9:32 AM (GMT -6)   
Shedontwearsocks, First off my deepest sympathies on the loss of your grandma. I lost my own Mom just 2 months ago. I too am still grieving, and I know it will take time.

I really think you need to get yourself to see this doctor. I also think you need to give him/her a chance. He/she could be the doctor you have been looking for and who will help you move thru this a/p. Sending healing prayers and good wishes your way.

Gail *Nanners*
Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Anxiety/Panic Forum
Been living with Crohn's Disease for 33 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, and Calcium and Xanax as needed. Resections in 2002 and 2005. Also diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Osteoarthritis and Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission.
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 60
   Posted 3/19/2009 9:54 AM (GMT -6)   


I am truly sorry about your mother, and my heart goes out to you. I know just how difficult losing a loved one is, and to watch my mom try to cope is even harder. I will keep you in my prayers.

Thank you for your kind words, I think you are right, I do need to give this doctor a chance and try to keep an open mind, it's just hard with my past bad experiences...but I will try!

I am abou to walk out the door to drive to my appointment (if i can get my legs to work)...I will let you know how it turns out.


best wishes,


Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 3/19/2009 10:00 AM (GMT -6)   


My sympathies are with you and now, grab all the hugs I am sending you and just put one foot in front of the will make it through the Doctors appointment and we will be right here waiting for you to get back home.

My prayers are with you.



Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
&  Moderator GERD  Forums

*~* *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 3/19/2009 10:06 AM (GMT -6)   
Megan, I am so glad you are going to see this doctor! Good for you! My heart goes out to you and Nanners for your's so hard to bear this kind of loss. I cared for my mother when she had cancer and was the only one with her when she died (at home). It is quite a shock, even when you are expecting it, as I was. God bless both of you. Let us know how your appointment goes, okay?

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 60
   Posted 3/19/2009 1:17 PM (GMT -6)   
Good Afternoon,
Well, I made it to my appointment, and somehow managed to put one foot in front of the other and make it in the door! The doctor was very nice, and so we talked while he did all his intake info on me. He told me what I already knew, which is that I have GAD and panic disorder, and suggested that I increase my SSRI, but I told him since it was working for panic attacks at the level I'm at now, I wanted to stay at current dosage in hopes that when the day comes that I can get off the SSRI, it will make tapering much easier.
Now, he referred me to a counselor for therapy and I'm SUPER anxious about this now because I can't get in to see her until APRIL 28TH! That's a month and a half away and I don't go back to pdoc for 3 months! Do any of you know how long it generally takes to get in for therapy??? I mean, I know they are super busy and I don't expect to get in this week or even next,  but a month and a half? So what am I supposed to do in the meantime? I have been taking some 0.25mg of xanax (which was given to me by grandmom) PRN...I DONT take it every day, sometimes I go a week or two before I even take a pill, but I'm starting to get low and this makes me anxious. I didn't want to come out and ask pdoc for meds b/c I was afraid it would be some sort of red flag for him thinking I just wanted drugs...which obviously isn't the case. Any suggestions? It just upsets me that it's difficult for someone like me to get needed meds for anxious times b/c the benzos have become scheduled drugs due to prescription abuse.  Help me out here, any thoughts or suggestions are appreciated
have a great day all,
megan smilewinkgrin
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