Good Morning AlittleLost,
Welcome to HealingWell and the A & P Forum. I am so glad you found us.
First of all, I do feel like you have had a major traumatic event in our life and yes what you have been through and are going through could certainly manifest itself in unusual sx due to anxiety.
If your numbness and tingling would have remained confined to your fingers I may have thought you had a nerve pinching somewhere but total body tingling and numbness does sound more like anxiety.
If your physician prescribed Valium and knows you are breast feeding it should be OK. However anytime you have doubts or questions about our medical condition or medications please do talk it through with your physician.
I admire your strength in dealing with all you have going on. Three children under the age of 5 is a handful and then to be there for you husband has certainly put a strain on you so please remember to make time for just you. Be good to yourself.
I feel you and your husband have been blessed to have each other.