Does anyone have social phobia?

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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 4/12/2010 6:42 PM (GMT -6)   
I am a new member to the site and have Bipolar disorder (dx in 2000) and have been told I have social phobia.  I am terrified of people, crowds, stores, most days I can't leave the house.  It has gotten so bad that I fear the other people in cars around me if I have to go out to drop off or pick up one of my kids.  I can't go anywhere alone.  I always have to drag my husband or one of my kids with me or I just make my husband go out and do it.  I have recently become ill, maybe Crohn's or chronic adhesions, but I feel so stupid going to the doctor.  I just want to go once, say what it is and not have to go again.  I hate putting myself out there, having to talk to nurses and being in the waiting room with people.  I have been having enough problems with the bipolar and now with this I have completely stopped going to school where I was having a hard enough time and never making it a full week before.  Now I am going to fail the entire semester.  Being sick has made me isolate worse.  My family went away last weekend and I went because I know my husband would have been upset if I said I wanted to stay home and I was afraid to be alone.  I ended up staying in the hotel room all weekend while my husband and the kids went out and did stuff.  It was a family reunion and I am sure my husbands family probably thought I was being a grouch but there were so many people around.  I had recently, before I got physically sick, gone down to Florida to visit my parents because my dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer and my mom was a wreck.  My (only) friend told me it was flooding therapy to help me get over my fears (cause I called her every day freaking out and wanting to go home).  I am really worried how my behavior is affecting my children and husband.  They must be getting tired of helping me and I am still physically ill and need to see another doctor and it is going to take all my courage to go to my appointment.  My therapist left the center I go to and they have not found anyone to take on her clients and I can't afford to go anywhere else.  I don't know what to do.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 4/13/2010 12:05 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, Newbie
I am sorry to hear about your phobias affecting your life so much. It sounds like you're close to being agoraphobic. I know what you mean as to having to go to the one clinic that will treat you. It's the same here. My fave doctor left and it is not the same.
Are you on any meds? If not, I strongly recommend that you see the doctor about doing so. Tell the psychiatrist exactly what's going on with you and don't hold back. Also, I know how hard it is to swallow your fear and go out and do things, but you need to MAKE YOURSELF do it. The more you face the fear, the more likely it will be to get less intense. I say this because of what happened to me back in 1993. I was getting more and more anxious about facing ANYTHING. I was awake all night dreading getting up and going to town the next morning (we lived in the country). I got up and got dressed. I was in terror as I got into the car. I wanted to run back into the house, but I didn't. Dad started the car and we were on our way. I was extremely tense and anxy, but I gritted my teeth and rode. about half-way to town, I had a full-blown panic attack and wanted nothing more than to go home. My dad offered to turn the car around and take me back but I knew right then and there, quite instinctively, that if I went back home, I wouldn't be able to leave it again...that scared the mud out of me! So even though I was crying my eyes out, I said "No". We kept going. I made it thru the day even though I felt like I was in a trembly fog. My anxiety came in waves. It would come and retreat some, etc. I went thru anxiety like that for a long time, nearly a year. Sometimes it was worse than other times, but I knew that I had to keep on fighting. I'll tell you what though, when the doc got me on meds, it was a big help!!!!
You need to be honest with your family about how you're feeling and let them be supportive. They may not understand (and probably never will understand exactly) what you're going thru, but if you educate them, they'll be less critical hopefully.
Hang in there and keep up the good fight. And I know I say it like a mantra on here, but PLEASE look into getting the book by Dr. Claire Weekes called "Hope and Help For Your Nerves". If they don't have it at your library, you can probably find it cheap on ebay.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/13/2010 2:16 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi and welcome
i never use to have this til i became deaf n now i find i am shutting self off from ppl n friends / family
it is scary out there at times but i know i was soooooo much hapier when i was involved doing things
you hv to learn to trust hun n that is so hard for many i believe
ive also had to make self realize that yes some ppl hv no patience with me n it will stay that way others i feel i can write or hv them write down to talk to me
i hv read these books of claire weeks n i agree they are helpful
so glad you got to light at end of tunnel

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/15/2010 7:00 AM (GMT -6)   
I go thru bouts of this now due to being deaf but i will force self to go out
i dont appreciate the attitude some ppl hv with deaf ppl but i go with it til i get so frustrated i speak my mind

i hv become more of a recluse n yes agoraphobia is not a good thing
it robs you of life

stay with us n we will help you thru

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