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NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/13/2010 9:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Anyone ever have anxiety about getting a job and then actually went and did get the job and have been able to handle it?
 
I have never had a job and sometimes I feel like I could never handle one.  But then I remember I did go on an interview a few years ago and I did fine at that and I think maybe I would be relaxed once I got used to a job... but I'm not sure how to force myself to go get it and plus I have noc areer in mind.  I got a degree in meteorology, but no clue what I would want a job in.

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/14/2010 2:10 AM (GMT -7)   
Anxiety about finding a job i believe is normal but some suffer more
i felt more useful when i worked in nursing homes looking after ppl
i felt more satisfied with self n what i was doing

i think its good practice to work n support self it gives you more self worth n much satisfaction imho
is there anything you want to do

lyn

debaser
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1745
   Posted 4/14/2010 2:14 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm a dork but I think meteorology would be an awesome career. Once you got into the field there's going to be job security. The weather's not just going to suddenly disappear or anything. And for me I think it would be relaxing most of the time. Lots of method...numbers, computer models, etc. Are you just not interested in it anymore?

It's common to have anxiety about job hunting. Even people without anxiety are going to get seriously stressed. And on anybody's first day there's going to be some anxiety, too. I bet you'd rise to the occasion.

NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/14/2010 10:38 PM (GMT -7)   
Well what sucks is my degree would only egt me a tv job (sure not trying that) or military job (sure not trying that). So if I do want a job in it I have to take several more high level math classes which is depressing in itself. lol

I've always loved weather though.

I also finished a few courses short of a professional writing degree, somaybe some job writing about weather, sports, etc... but not sure I'll ever come across that. For now I just want some easy job and a part time one and worry about my career later once I'm less scared of a job.

NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/15/2010 11:52 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm not even sure what my anxiety is as far as towards jobs. I guess social anxiety must be most of it. I don't "think" I'm afraid of failing. Maybe my anxiety is just for no other reason than I have never had a job and so I am worried about a change of any type.

I know some of my fears include:
* what if I wake up feeling terrible? then I have to somehow still go to work and it's hard to function when I feel very depressed.

* what if people arerude or mean to me? Almost everyone says there are rude people at their jobs. Although lately I don't think I've let it bother me as much when someone was rude to me.

* Will I be so worn out from working that all the fun is gone out of my life? (had that fear since in high school)

* Will they give me too much work for me to handle and me then feel like a failure for not being able to do it at a relaxed pace.

* How will I get to work? I don't drive due to a vision problem and I would hate risking the public transportation in this city, one of the most dangerous in the world really (Memphis, TN)

I remember even as a young kid already having anxiety about even spending the night at friends' houses since I feel so unsafe when not in my everyday setting. I guess I'm scared of anything other than what I'm used to.

I'm also worried I won't even GET a job if I do try hard to get one because I would have no references really.
 
edit:  Oh and also I'm worried I will hate the WORK itself.  Who wants to be miserable all day?

janetlee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 4/15/2010 2:30 PM (GMT -7)   
NO,
Back when I was 17, I went got my first job...and after one day of training, came home, ate supper, watched some TV, went to bed...woke up in the middle of the night with my first panic attack ever...didn't go back. Tried a few more times, no go. If I had known about getting mental health help back then, maybe things would've been different. I'll never know for sure. I would definitely encourage you to try because you'll NEVER know unless you do. Maybe that's what you need to keep your mind on less depressing things! Whatever you do, remember the forum is here!
jl

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 4/15/2010 3:07 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey there,


Sounds like anticipatory anxiety which is my big one, the what ifs?



I agree with JL, go for it, try it and stay in the moment. Don't worry about the what ifs? You will deal with the interview and the job offer when it happens.



Good luck.



Kitt

janetlee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 4/15/2010 5:27 PM (GMT -7)   
NO,
All the things you brought up are possible things you may have to deal with, but probably not all at once or on a day-to-day basis. I think I was afraid for a number of reasons when I tried those many years ago. I was afraid of failure at the job (afraid I'd go "blank", forgetting how to do it), I didn't want to be stuck in one spot all day (it was a cashier's position), and was sad about being seperated from my family all day. We lived in the rurals and it was about 12 miles or so to work. I felt very alone. I remember being inhigh school and would watch the cars go by the windows and wish I was in the cars...anywhere but at school, which I hated. I guess I was feeling the same thing about working. And now, I am unable to even think about the possibility of working. I gave up thinking about that in 1992 after a week of substitute teaching in a school for the mentally handicapped. The kids were great, very loving and non-judgmental, but I'd get anticipatory anxiety every day and be a mess until later into the school day. I was so ashamed of quitting yet another time and have never done so again. I do go help my mom clean offices 3 nights a week as a non-paid helper. There are times when I wish i could get my own job, but I don't really want one in my heart of hearts. I try to contribute to this world in my own piddly way. I am not sorry that I did try those times. At least I KNOW by trying it. Otherwise, it would always be "could I have?"
There is one saying I really love (not that I was ever able to apply it in my own life! LOL!) It goes: Find a job you love and you'll never work a day in your life.
I think that if I'd started with something I WANTED to do (I never wanted to be a cashier) it might have been different with me. SIGH!!!
Oh well, the only advice I'll give is this: If you try, you'll either succeed by doing well or you'll succeed by at least knowing you'd tried. Either way, you wouldn't be a failure!
jl

NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/16/2010 10:38 PM (GMT -7)   
I feel like I "must" succeed at some point because I don't have much choice really. So I just keep hoping when I do try to get a job I'm really ready for it where I don't have to keep trying different ones when it's a point in my life where I can't afford to not have a job.

I wish I knew one that I would truly love to have. When I like something I could talk to tons of people and not even feel social anxiety usually.

I hated high school also. One year I missed like 40+ days of school due to my anxiety. I just told my parents I felt sick or felt like I couldn't go and sometimes they would try to get me to, but I ended up staying home. So this anxiety has gone on for a long time with me also.

It's funny that one of the main things people say about me is how smart I am. But yet I'm not smart enough to stop this stupid anxiety I guess. Not that it means I'm dumb, but it kind of feels like being dumb when you know how to feel and can't control it.

And with me being a guy it's hard to end up in relationships because the guy is usually expected to be the one chasing and I'm shy approachign women.

Well I'm all off topic, but anyway I KNOW i can handle a job. But it's getting my body to agree with my brain for once.

I also figure you can handle one too at some point. I obviously don't know you though, but I'm sure somehow you could eventually do it. And at least trying the substitute teaching was a big deal. I've gone on interviews twice and that's it... haven't actually taken any jobs. I get told I would be a good teacher, but I figure I would be too nervous... but maybe not. I think I'm less nervous talking to younger people anyway.

In ninth grade our spanish teacher had a nervous breakdown and quit her job. The students ignored her and she couldn't even teach because they talked over her. Out of all my years of school that was odd because it was the only time I saw a teacher controlled by students.

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/17/2010 4:10 AM (GMT -7)   
I have had a/p n paic attacks since i was about nine so well over 45 plussss yrs
i went to school n applied myself there even with the a/p it made me work harder imho
from there uni n Nursing school
i graduated with honors and worked for many many yrs as a reg nurse in my own retirement home as well as the administrator
i found that it was challenging and my adrenalin was great for the work
although i would burn out at times and broke the rules of not getting close to residents lol
i really loved my job but so many passed away n i finally had to stop working due to health n hving to look after mom n dad
but at least when working my mind was on staff n residents not on my a/p constantly

just my thoughts

lyn
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NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/17/2010 11:27 AM (GMT -7)   
Well that's like today... I feel good right now, but I am already bored and that's not good for me. I either end up worrying or obsessing over something stupid. And I don't really feel like getting outside. Tomorrow we're having a family thing at my parents' since we had to skip Easter since my dad had a heart attack 3 days before it. But see I only have sporadic activity. Most of my life I've liked indoors stuff such as movies, games, internet. Now it's all pretty boring usually and I don't know what to do to get active and stay happy. And when I'm living alone that means it's even harder to force myself to do anything.

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 4/17/2010 12:37 PM (GMT -7)   
I know that all too well my daughter is gone 99 percent of time n i hv become a recluse due to being deaf
i feel ppl get frusratted easily cuz i cannot hear
its very very lonely
i get up do the routine of cleaning and sit on chair/ couch watch telly or on puter

lately i hv made self go for walks or just even sit out on porch with no puter
it helps me out for sure

im so sorry you are going thruthis but you need to get out just even if its for a lilo walk ya know
huggs
lyn

NightOwl33
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 4/17/2010 4:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks. I wish you weren't going through what you have to also. :(

I actually did go walk one direction and go around streets to end up back at my apartment from the other end. So it was a 30 minute walk. Better than nothing. Most of the walk I was hanging my head down though and trying to stop doing it. I guess I must still be afraid people are judging me. Plus with my vision problem I automatically feel more anxiety because I can't see someone clearly from far off. So I keep worrying someone is waving and me not even see they're there or something. Maybe I should wear my glasses some where at least it's a bit better, despite not too much. But then I feel like I'm even uglier with glasses on.
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