Hi there. I'm new to this site, but not very new to anxiety.
Five years ago, I was a passenger in a very bad car accident. I was left with PTSD and it took me a year and a half to get help. I had CBT councilling, which was fantastic. On the back of it, I learned to drive and I am now a confident driver and a trusting passenger. However, I have been left with general anxiety.
It started with a fear of fire, possibly relating to the smell of burning tyres from the accident. I started turning off all the plugs in the house, and double, triple checking that I had. I used to panic if I thought I hadn't turned them all off. My councillor gave me the training to nip the OCD in the bud, and luckily I haven't been left with that.
Now I will worry about silly things. My husband swallowing his tounge whilst snoring, mirrors reflecting sunlight and starting fires, ceilings and walls falling through because of TV vibrations.... anything and everything, really. Sometimes there doesn't need to be a reason. I'll get a feeling in my stomach that I just can't budge. Loud noises or certain smells can set it off, too. It's debilitating, humiliating.
In the past year, I have also suffered from tachycardia. My heart rate has been over 120 bps at resting. I am on Propanolol, a beta blocker, to treat the tachycardia, but my GP has told me that there is little point in further CBT because I have already learned the techniques, I just need to use them. Much easier said than done. The propanolol has helped the anxiety, but I fear it will never truly leave me.
My husband is very understanding, but I fear that if I bother him too much over it, our relationship will suffer. No-one else that I know suffers from this, and I need someone to talk to about it. So, here I am, looking for people who know what I am talking about, people who don't judge me for being a 'headcase' and people who understand.