Good Morning Everyone!
Hope that this finds you having a panic/anxiety free day thus far. I'm doing okay- not bad but not good either.
Yesterday I made it to my Dr. appt. I had a list of things to ask her so that I wouldn't forget anything... and I ended up forgetting to ask her two main things- ugh! So, I am thinking should I call this morning to make another appt.? I ended up forgetting to tell her that most of the time it feels as though there is a rubberband around my left ankle. Anyone else ever have this feeling? I recall over the summer visiting a cousin and she mentioned feeling it even before i did... anyhow WHAT IS IT from, I wonder? I of course link it to my heart. The other thing that I forgot to tell her about was this buzzing little nerve that i feel on my back ( like it is in the lung.) She ended up letting me tell her all about the heart pains, arm pains, neck, etc. etc. She told me that someone with Panic Disorder really CAN have chest pains similar to a heart attack. I kept asking her are you sure??? She checked my heart by listening to it for a while and said that she would be able to tell if my heart was jumping all over the place. She said that my heart sounded healthy. I told her that it would help me if I had reassurance with a stress test or ekg. She said that I was fine and that she would give me a blood test something to check to see if my electrolites (sp?) were down or something like that... Ugh. She did a mini physical on me and said that I was checking out healthy. So, I leave there feeling a little better but still wondering why they never double check to make sure that I am heart healthy.
I went through out the day feeling okay... Then, I have to read an article in Redbook about the NUMBER ONE KILLER AMONG WOMAN- HEART DISEASE. I know, I know, I should not of read the darn thing- but i felt like I had to. So, needless to say I have EVERY DARN symptom! So, I go back to thinking that I am going to have a heart attack. I'm 31, and it didn't help that there was a 23 year old that had a heart attack and kept insisting that there was something wrong with her to the Dr. and they kept telling her that she was okay and she ends up having one. Ugh!
I pray all the time about not having these thoughts but when you have the physical symptoms to back them up... what is one to think??? I wish that I had MONEY so that I could get one of those body scans. Maybe that would put my mind at ease!
I have been taking the 50 mg of Toprol for blood pressure and it has finally gone down to 122/80. I'm happy about that! It is nice knowing that the meds are in there helping taking the strain off of my heart... but still I feel like the Dr.'s just SEE my Anxiety and tend to see anything else? Does anyone else ever feel like that?
My Dr. also told me that along with seeing a therapist I was to make an appt. every day with myself and get out of the house for one hour. She said for me to go on a walk or to go sit in the car and watch the waves along the coast, etc. I will have to do that for myself... so that I can reduce some of the stress that I have at this point in my life. With the stress of my Dad being sick here in the house, it feels as though my body is summerged in water and only my head is afloat. The Dr. also said for me to look for a caregivers support group. We are military and there isn't a group at the base hospital... wonder if there is one out in town? We do live in a rather small town in Wa. state though... Ugh! Hope that I can find one.
What is involved in an EKG? Is it just like sticky tabs put on you and it monitors your heart? I would appreciate anything on this... thanks!
Well, I am going to clean house this morning... and hope that I can manage to not think about that article that I read in the magazine- UGH!
Thanks for all of the replys from my first two posts- It has been wonderful to have such support here!!! I can't thank you enough!