Ask a stupid question

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jethro
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2004
Total Posts : 176
   Posted 10/25/2006 1:32 AM (GMT -6)   
There are times when we don't ask questions because we feel people may laugh at us.  I received this email today so I thought I would share, just to show that your question may not be as stupid as you think!!
 

Actual call centre conversations !!!!!

Customer:     "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?".
Operator:     "Where did you get that number from, sir?".
Customer:     "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".
Operator:     "Sir, they are our opening hours".
     

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Samsung Electronics

Caller:          "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator:    
    "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".
Caller:          "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC  wall socket  
 and  telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator:      "I think you mean the telephone point on the wall".

---------------------------------------------------------------------- 
  
RAC Motoring Services

Caller:          "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in
 Australia ?"
Operator:      " I think there's a clue in the name, sir" 
 

 -------------------------------------------------------------------- 
  
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator:        "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller:             "Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland
".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Tech Support:      "I need you to right-click on the open Desktop".
Customer:             "OK".
Tech Support:      "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
Customer:             "No".
Tech Support:      "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer:             "No".
Tech Support:      "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?".

Customer:            "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
  
Tech Support:          "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer:                 "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Caller:  "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?".

----------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------- 


There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):



Operator:         "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"

Caller:              "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator:         "What sort of trouble??"
Caller:              "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator:         "Went away?"
Caller:              "They disappeared."
Operator:         "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller:              "Nothing."
Operator:         "Nothing??"
Caller:              "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator:         "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller:              "How do I tell?"
Operator:         "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller:              "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator:         "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller:              "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator:         "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller:              "What's a monitor?"
Operator:         "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's  on??"
Caller:               "I don't know."
Operator:          "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller:              "Yes, I think so."
Operator:         "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller:              "Yes, it is."
Operator:         "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller:               "No."
Operator:          "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller:               "Okay, here it is."
Operator:          "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller:               "I can't reach."
Operator:          "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller:               "No."
Operator:          "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller:               "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator:          "Dark??"
Caller:               "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.

Operator:              "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller:               "I can't."
Operator:          "No? Why not??"
Caller:               "Because there's a power failure."
Operator:  
              "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
                                  Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller:               "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator:           "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back
 to the store you bought it from."
Caller:                "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator:            "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller:                 "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator:            "Tell them you're too f*
*king stupid to own a computer!!!!!" 
 


The mind is like a parachute - It works better when it's open.


Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 10/25/2006 1:42 AM (GMT -6)   
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL


This CRACKED me UP!!!


Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Ativan/Lorazapam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (15 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 



Mooney123
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 240
   Posted 10/25/2006 1:48 AM (GMT -6)   
Hee Hee. tongue

CounterClockwise
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1529
   Posted 10/25/2006 4:13 AM (GMT -6)   
Oh Jethro, I'm a-laughin' hard!! Loved the last one especially!!

Reminds me of when I worked in a university library and had some equally wonderful enquiries, the best 2 of which being:

Library User: Could you tell me where the red books are please?
Me: [Total bewilderment and wish to laugh -- and an inability to respond to the question for a moment. Then all the usual enquiries to try to tie down which books the user *really* wanted.]
N.B. A year afterwards the library actually colour-coded the different sections in it: was this user simply psychic??!

Library User: Could you tell me where the L-O-S-T books are please?
Me: The L-O-S-T books?
Library User: Yes, I looked this book up and it said it was shelved at L-O-S-T.
Me: Ah, that means "LOST".
Library User: Oh. ... Could you tell me where the LOST books are?
Me: Um, they're lost...

And remember that this was a *university* library!!!

Happy day to all!

Rosie x
********************

People are not like fish: they do not work well battered.

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded...

********************

 
Moderator, Bipolar Forum


smiler
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 657
   Posted 10/25/2006 5:16 AM (GMT -6)   
Jethro - thanks so much for posting these!
I can't wipe the grin off my face (ppl call us mad???!!!)
That was just wonderful!

normalsnofun
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 2500
   Posted 10/25/2006 8:51 AM (GMT -6)   
Jethro thanks for that I needed it hehe I guess im not the only one who works with people lacking common sense. Let me share:

At work we have a handicap acess gate and 2 turnstyles as ways into the building. When I work the desk I like to close the acess gate. When I do this it slows people down so i can see if they really belong. The funny part comes in that if I close the gate 90% of the people dont know how to get in. Mind you its an engineering school. So they push the gate and look at me like um let me in. Then they ask if they have to show thier ID I say yes they do and then....they push the gate again!!!! HELLO!!!! I mean I have a button to open it but I dont use it less someone REALLY needs in that gate. So I tell them to go through the turnstyle and they look at me like im speaking jibberish so I point. SMART PEOPLE!!!!!!
--Michelle

...I dont want the world to see me, 'cause I dont think that they'd understand
When everythings made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am..."
--Goo Goo Dolls

"Those who are different change the world,
Those who are the same keep it that way."

“We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”--George Bernard Shaw


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 10/25/2006 10:01 AM (GMT -6)   
Jethro just what I needed after having locked self out lol and having to climb thru window BUT at least I was laughing then and now I am just a roaring
did you send that email yet ?????
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
         Don't Comprimise Yourself :you are all you have    
 Never Give up on Yourself ,Your True friends nor your Dignity
   


shell67
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 1268
   Posted 10/25/2006 12:16 PM (GMT -6)   

tongue   tongue tongue tongue tongue tongue Thank you so much jethro, i needed that today, and yes, there are some crazy questions out there, i get alot of them working in a library hehe. Again, thanks for the smile...

shell


" Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now, in this instant of time. From this moment onward you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed."
Eileen Caddy


Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 10/25/2006 1:45 PM (GMT -6)   
Funny story for you all.
 
I was at work one day with my coworker, I'll just call her Barbie.  We had just gotten some fast food and I was eating a chicken crunch wrap from Taco Bell, she had gotten food from Mcdonalds.
 
Me:  "This would taste so MUCH better if there was beef in it.  The chicken is gross."
 
Barbie:  "Beef?  Eww that's gross.  I don't like beef," she says this as she takes a huge bite out of her Big Mac.
 
Me: "Well what do you think your Big Mac is made out of, it's beef."
 
Barbie:  "Hamburger, HAM, duh!!!"
 
Me:  "Well what does that mean?"
 
Barbie: "It's made out of pig, HAMburger," she keeps saying.
 
Me:  "No it's beef, it comes from a cow."
 
Barbie:  "No, it doesn't.  It's made of pig."
 
Me and a couple coworkers:  "The word hamburger is derived from Hamburgh, Germany, and it's made from cow."
 
Barbie:  Well Barbie decides to go ask everyone in the OFFICE if she's right, because she thinks she is so right at this point that a hamburger does in fact come from a pig.  When she asks everyone in the office, they look at her like she's nuts.

hahaha

Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Ativan/Lorazapam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (15 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 



jethro
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2004
Total Posts : 176
   Posted 10/25/2006 4:00 PM (GMT -6)   
There seems to be a lot of them about.  lol
 
Yes Lyn sent it yesterday
The mind is like a parachute - It works better when it's open.


Georgia5
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 285
   Posted 10/25/2006 6:04 PM (GMT -6)   
It's always good to laugh those are great. Thanks for posting that.

hugs,
Georiga

normalsnofun
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 2500
   Posted 10/26/2006 8:24 AM (GMT -6)   
Gotta love those people who have nothing but air between their ears.
--Michelle

...I dont want the world to see me, 'cause I dont think that they'd understand
When everythings made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am..."
--Goo Goo Dolls

"Those who are different change the world,
Those who are the same keep it that way."

“We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”
--George Bernard Shaw


steph2005
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 305
   Posted 10/31/2006 9:39 PM (GMT -6)   
This is just the laugh I needed today :) Thanks for posting!
*Steph*
 
 

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