So nice to meet you. I hope your finding everyone here caring and supportive for you. I know how hard it must be on you with what your husband is going thru but you being by his side and giving him support meens a lot to him. My hubby don't do good in crowds eather but he tries. I hope everything works out ok for you and look forward to talking again soon.
your husbands meds may help, especially the antidepressant if its working, sometimes they dont work, do you think his is?
anxiety pills can help a lot if the dose is got right, more can be taken for difficult social occasions
he needs to learn new ways of calming and relaxing himself and to learn CBT, get some books on recovering from social anxiety, read them and tell him what they advise
he probably has what would be now described as social anxiety disorder for which paxil, an antidepressant is highly and expensively advertised, however, IMO any other ntidepressant is as likely to help
tell us his meds doses
most here get help from breathing deep and slow when anxious and especailly avoiding rapid shallow panting and breath holding, helped me a lot
The fact that you are on here really says so much about how much you care for him and want to be there for him. That's fantastic!
The best thing that my husband does re: my anxiety is that he takes me seriously. I have other friends and family who think that anxiety is something you can just make go away if you think rationally. They don't experience it, so they don't understand it. My husband has had some experience with it a number of years ago, so that really helps. But I just love the fact that he acknowledges that it's a real issue (as opposed to just being in my head), and he doesn't judge me for not being able to control it. If I want him to, he'll rub my back during an anxiety attack, but if I'm having a "don't touch me" kind of anxiety attack, he won't. He's great at encouraging me to do things that push my boundaries but never forces me to. I always know that he'll support me no matter what. This is the best thing he could do for me....and in my opinion, the best thing you can do for your husband.
Aside from that, is there any chance he'd try this forum? For myself, I'm finding it so wonderful to hear other people's experiences and feel like I'm not "weird" for having these problems.
Good luck! Kudos to you for asking this question. I know it's hard on you too. He's lucky to have you.