It sounds to me, even though you don't see it right now, that a short time away from your boyfriend might help? Maybe you could meet some new friends and reclaim your independence, which is what you want.
Maybe you should try finding new hobbies like sewing or painting or kickboxing. (We get monthly newsletters of classes people can take in our city for all sorts of things, and they're great place to meet people!!)
And hey, you DO have friends. I'm your friend and we're all your friends here on HW!!! :)
Maybe you should try and find also an anxiety/depression support group where you live. I haven't found one yet but my sister used to go to one and it helped her a lot.
I know it's hard to be away from him, but I think it might be for the best and maybe you can even turn your depression around? *HUGGGS*
You said you don't know who you are without him... well you are you.. and you need to find that person and embrace and love YOU!! :)
Finding yourself is hard to do, talking about
it here will help. I had to leave a few relationships where I didn't know who I was without my boyfriend, and it was hard!!!
And how come you're trying to wean yourself off your meds hon? Oh I see, (reading further on) well if you can get put on something else, do it, but speak to your doctor about
what you're doing and explain how you've been feeling as well!! Weaning yourself off them without supervision isn't a good idea I don't think, and it doesn't sound like it's doing any good for you, call your doc first thing tomorrow and ask about
other meds you can be put on.
What dosage are you at now on the Cymbalta?
I hope this helps.
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."
DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
RX: Ativan/Lorazapam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (15 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines