Thanks for opening this post, I hope you have time to read and give me your opinion. Mayb this will help you by hearing about what im going through and what ive been through.
Im 19 years old and nearly 20, all my life I've had OCD. It started first when I was about 12 and before I went to bed at night, id have to completly check out my bed. just incase their were spiders there kinda thing.
I wasn't aware of it at the time, but I have OCD. Now OCD i know from my own research is not just about doing certain habits to feel better, but for the first couple of years I definatly went through all the primary stages of it Including exstensive hand washing, laying out toothbrushes in the bathroom and doing habits before bed, standing in the garden and feeling the ground under my feet once a night and finding a place to stand where is has to be completly flat, couting numbers in my head and having to say them perfectly and many many more. All that my sound stupid to alot of people, for for me it was very very real.
I would tend to develop a new habit and then get over it within 1-8 months. But for ages it was one thing after another. Im not sure that the people I saw at special child places helped but I got to a stage where I wasn't suffering that much anymore and I was quite content.
After a bad split from an ex girlfriend at the age of 18 I have started suffering from what I beleive to be a catagory of OCD called Somantic obsession (fear of illness). Now im not sure if I have the name for this term right as ive only seen it on a list of OCD syptoms but it sounds like what I have.
It started off with being worryied about my heart. I would give myself chest pains and feel very ill, but i was doing it all to myself but I simpl couldnt help the way i felt and no-one could convince me that I wasnt ill or dying!
When I went to see doctors they fobbed it off straight away as OCD even though they did not listen to me. I guess I wanted them to check my heart and tell me that im 100% fine. But in the end and after a couple months I got over it.
The nest thing i got was fear of headaches and having a brain tumour. I gave myself terrible headaches and again I'm pretty sure it was all from having OCD and worrying about it.
At the moment I have a fear of fainting. Im not sure why im scared of it so much but im pretty sure again that its my OCD thats making me feel as bad as I do. As soon as I get into a situation that makes me a little anxious. Its really annoying me and getting me down at the moment, because I just want to go out with my friends and skateboard (which I love and have a small company selling skateboard decks). I tend to feel good in the morning then into the afternoon I always tend to feel really bad and have to lay down to make myself feel better. I think something that made me feel worse was when skating with friends I got a load of stars in my eyes that where still there when I closed them. It really scared me and I felt instantly dizzy (proberly because I was paniccing.
Has anyone else ever suffered from making themself feel faint and dizzy all the time through worrying?
Does it definatly sound like my OCD is causing it? (which im pretty sure it is, but being the worryier which I now am I have to ask)
Thank you soo much if you have read this, and ive love to hear your opinion.