I went to my counselor's today. She got very stern with me and told me that she can't help me if I don't help myself. On went the light! She's right, I know she is. She told me to put up my Christmas tree (there is nothing Christmasy at my house right now), if nothing else. So, I went to WalMart, by myself, and got some little tiny lights and little tiny decarations for my very little tree. I have other decorations that go on it, but I didn't want to dig through boxes after boxes and rearrange the whole room to find them. The tree is very accessible. So, here I go. She also told me to make sugar cookies and take them to a neighbor, so I bought those cute Pillsbury things that you can pop in the oven and I know who I'm taking them to. She said that I keep talking about things I want to do and never do them. She's right. I'm all talk and no action. Good at giving advise, horrible at taking it or following my own advise. I'm really going to try. Thank you all for your advise. I'm going to take it all and impliment it somewhere in my life. I can't do this anymore, wallowing in self pity and loathing. Time to try and get back the old me.
Honey I know if anyone can do this you can. You have been a great inspration here to a lot of us and sometimes it's harder to see the strength in ourselfs then it is to see it in others. We all see your strength honey and were all right here for you.
First of all, I am so proud of you for the steps you have taken!!!
I have been where you are, no getting out, pj's only, ER trips for migraines, and more migraines. I understand the combonation of depression and pain are NO FUN and really hard to deal with.
2nd, I was wondering if you are taking all the meds you have listed. the best thing I ever did for my depression and migraines was get off most, not all, but most of my meds. I really think some of them made me even more "crazy". The Geodon and seraquil(sp?) I could not handle. Made me like so doped up zombie. And being on so much stuff makes your hormones and chemicals go crazy, which can also lead to migraines. And of course you know depression is a major trigger for migraines...its a never ending cycle it seems. Depression = migraine; migraine= depression. Gosh, its no fun.
I do like your regimen for migraines(if it works for you, woudn't for me) and i think that Klonopin, and a depression med and maybe something else you need is good, but being on too many can actually make things worse.
Yes, I do take all my meds and take them the way they are ordered. My Mom thinks that I need to come off some of them also and I'm starting to agree with her. I'm weaning off the geodon and cymbalta and would like to wean off the inderal which is perscribed for migraine, not high BP. Not only would it possibly make me feel better, it would put more money in my pocket! I'm in that rut you were talking about. Although I'm starting to go into a manic phase, I feel it. I had a panic attack while wrapping Christmas presents today, uuuuggggg! I've been frantically rearranging things and cleaning, not liking where my furniture is at and wanting to rearrange it too. When I go manic, I'm really mean. I don't mean to be, it just comes out and then when all is said and done, I regret it. I just can't stop it from flying out. Maybe they have human muzzles, if not they should. I need to get one of those.
Thanks to everyone else and all your advise and encouragement!