Anxiety and violence.

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sodoesplastic
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 12/24/2006 12:30 PM (GMT -6)   
I've been dealing with PD and PA for over a year now, and recently some scary thoughts and ideas have begun racking my brain.  I was watching Nightmare on Elm Street during Halloween, when I started thinking about the probability of my becoming a serial killer.  I have no history of violence, and I don't fit the profile at all, but the idea soon sucked up quite a bit of my waking thoughts and I became convinced I was turning into a bloodthirsty murderer.  For a time, it left me with a VERY unpleasant urge to harm loved ones around me.  I would be eating out with my girlfriend, having a great time, and would suddenly feel like I was one second away from reaching over the table and grabbing her.  It hasn't happened in a few months, but man, it was UNPLEASANT.  Has anyone ever dealt with something like this, or know what could trigger those awful urges?  Any advice would be appreciated.

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/24/2006 1:09 PM (GMT -6)   
WElcome
No I have no idea but would suggest that you do see a therapist and talk this thru
does not sound healty to me at all
I am glad you found us and you will find lots of support here as you post more but please do talk to a professional about this
Happy Holidays and all the best in 2007
lyn


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 Happy Holidays and all the Best in 2007 .........
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                                   Lyn

Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 12/26/2006 8:06:23 AM (GMT-7)


hypopaniac
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 40
   Posted 12/24/2006 1:47 PM (GMT -6)   
I have had these type of thoughts as well, especially after watching 20/20 or shows on psychopaths. I consider these unwanted thoughts that many people experience with obsessive or anxiety disorders. The author of "Panic to Power" talks about having such thoughts. I simply let these thoughts pass, since I have never even been in a physical fight with anyone, much less been violent. Study up on anxiety disorders and talk to therapist if you cannot let these thoughts pass on their own.

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/24/2006 2:20 PM (GMT -6)   
YES Claire Weeks is a great person and writer
Thanks Hypo for your great input
U have become an asset to this forum 'Thanks from my heart
'All the best to you in the New Year and thru the Holidays


LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity...with that ...My God
 Family and Great Friends ........I have it All
 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......You can Do It........We are Here For You 
 Happy Holidays and all the Best in 2007 .........
               God Bless .........Lyn


smiler
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Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 657
   Posted 12/24/2006 2:31 PM (GMT -6)   

Don't know if you're on any meds or not but.........years ago I was given Prozac which made me want to harm/kill total strangers in the street - I never did hurt anyone , I went back to the docs asap and they changed my meds.

Just my two cents.


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DX : Bipolar , Panic Disorder , GAD , OCD.
 
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aquarias
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 296
   Posted 12/24/2006 5:37 PM (GMT -6)   
When my anxiety was really bad- I had the same thing. It was horrible. Horrible thoughts.  I thought I actually might want to act on them.  I could be eating dinner and have the thought of stabbing someone with a knife.  I know that is horrible, but that is what severe anxiety disorder does.  I am past that now- I have been in therapy and on medication. You will never act on those thoughts because you are not crazy, that is why those thoughts are so troubling.  There are CD's by Lucinda Bassett that might help you.  You can find it online. It is expensive, but it lets you know you are not the only one going through this.  I can't even hurt a fly or a bug, and I had horrific thoughts.  But that is all they are "thoughts"  not actions. Take care.

Twiggygal
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Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 12/24/2006 11:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Welcome to Healing Well . :)


I have had similar urges and it is quite frustrating too... but it typically happens after watching very violent movies or TV shows.

So now I avoid those types of shows because for some reason I become obsessed with the very idea you're talking about and start panicking because I think I am turning into a murderer.... WHICH I'M NOT... it's just my dang mind messing with me...

I've never physically injured anyone (not on purpose anyway... kids always get hurt tho when I was younger I mean).... and I could never see myself wanting to hurt someone... I just became obsessed with the idea of it too....

Just try to listen to some relaxing music and not any violent music or whatever you may be doing that might be inhibiting these thoughts.

We panic disorder sufferers tend to obsess on thoughts... what may run through a person's mind once... repeats itself incesssantly for myself anyways...

Like... similar thought obsessions..

Did I lock the doors to the house?

I know I locked the doors.

Wait what if I forgot about ONE lock...

and so on...

I do that often ... obsessing about locks....

slightly OCD maybe?

I don't know.


Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 



sodoesplastic
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 12/24/2006 11:11 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you very much for your insite, guys. This forum is a godsend. I was thinking about the topic after I wrote it, and remembered I had those same urges in different situations, outside of harming other people. I would randomly want to put my fist through a wall, or pull my hair out. Maybe more people could relate to this? Maybe it's just part of the frustration we go through having to deal with this affliction.

Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 12/24/2006 11:18 PM (GMT -6)   
Yeh.. I get those feelings too...

Probably pent up frustration at times from having this disorder... I get so angry I cry... or I want to just punch the wall....

usually I just cry.... or I start painting... I try to release my anger in more constructive ways. I get mad at the world... and wonder why I have this disorder...

but it is what it is...

It's hard to say where it stems from.... we can only guess...

what seems to make the most sense is that perhaps we are frustrated and are fighting these demons day in and day out... and almost want to punch a wall to see if the pain overrides the fear perhaps?

Just my two cents...

Twiggygal~


"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 



hopefulmigrainer
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Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 902
   Posted 12/25/2006 12:45 AM (GMT -6)   
Welcome to HealingWell. I'm glad you posted. I personally have never had these kinds of thoughts but I do have a hard time getting particularly disturbing news clips out of my mind. It's like my mind wants to drive me crazy! I do hightly urge you to talk to a therapist about this for your own mental health and the safety of others. Their are people who keep these thoughts to themselves b/c they never "act" on them and then one day they do. Oprah had a show not long ago about depression. A mild mannered husband and Father killed his children. It came out later that he was depressed and that he had those thoughts for a long time but since he never acted on them he convinced himself that he never would. He saw a therapist but never told the doctor. I believe that a psychologist can help and I hope that you will seek that help. You can learn how to free yourself of these thoughts. Take care.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Amen."
 
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freezinginAK
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1052
   Posted 12/25/2006 12:48 AM (GMT -6)   
  I know that I too have had that feeling, I had beat the crap out of a guy just fishing I tryed to show him how to do it fishing for the red salmons and he just keeped throwing his hook all over the place and then he hooked me, I pulled the hook out and just started to beat on him at that time all I wanted to do was kill the guy thank God I was pulled off of him at that time and that's when I realized I needed help now.

aquarias
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 296
   Posted 12/25/2006 11:52 AM (GMT -6)   
I don't think that you will go crazy and commit the acts that are in your head. I have been through a lot of therapy, and therapists and psychiatrists do not think you are going to actually do anything.  I also have slight OCD- especially with locking the doors on the house.  I have headed out to the mall and driven back 3 or 4 times to check that the door where locked.  But I have a small dog that I worry about getting out.

ThatsMzTaz2U
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 166
   Posted 12/25/2006 9:21 PM (GMT -6)   
Just a input have you had your thyroid checked out, with me many years ago I had the same thoughts terrible thoughts I dont even want to say but I found out several months later that I had an over active thryoid and the doctor said that you can have these thoughts with that just a idea, I have had no more horrible thoughts since my thyroid is under control
 Hugs Anna
________________________________________
Help Me Lord To Be All I Can Be And To Take One Day At A Time
 


nolaman
New Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 15
   Posted 12/26/2006 12:00 PM (GMT -6)   
AVOID VIOLENT SHOWS! If you are constantly fixated on harming people, you need to seek professional help. It will also protect you in the event something does happen. If you are violently ill, you should avoid things that make you feel this way.

jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 12/26/2006 1:02 PM (GMT -6)   
Just wondering if you have been to counselling/therapy? The reason I ask is that sometimes we supress our anger at stuff that has gone on in our lives and not even realise it..and it can take a trigger like the movie that u watched to bring it to the surface..talking about it to a prof. is a great way to deal with these feelings :)
Just a thought anyhow..
Take good care.
Maree
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